Anata no Ichiban Ni Naritai
by Zentrodie
Summary: During a Boson jump test an unexpected accident results in the altering of the lives of all those aboard the Nadesico as they try to recover what was lost to them, what was most precious.
1. A simple experiment

Standard Disclaimer

I do not own any rights to Nadesico, contact ADV if you wish to know who does.

This is going to be my first attempt at a Nadesico fic, I mostly work with comedy but as by the rating you will note it is a drama.  I hope you like it and continue to read it past the initial chapter that is if I continue to write it.

This fic begins after eps 19 but before the Jovian brain bot attacked the Nadesico.

Thank you.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anata no Ichiban Ni Naritai

Chapter One- A simple experiment

The talent contest buzz was finally beginning to die down, and to the members of the Nadesico that meant it was to once again think of war.

The Jovian's advances in boson jumping technology was an advantage Erina was hoping to curve.  Her target was set and once she convinced Akito to help Nergal's tests, Earth would be on equal standings.

"I don't see why you need me to help you with this Erina?" Akito asked after being cornered in the mess hall.

Staring him right in his eyes Erina calmly explained to him, "You're the only human we have that has survived a Boson jump Tenkawa.  We need to learn why that is."

Akito looked at his half eaten tray of food, "Is it dangerous?"

Playing on his idol worship, "It is uncertain.  We don't know if it was a fluke that allowed you to live, but don't you want to be a hero?" 

'Why did this happen to me, I just wanted to be a simple cook.  Now they want me to be a test subject.'  Setting his chopsticks down he addressed her again, "So you're saying I could die."

"I didn't say die; I just said…" Erina was cut off as a holoscreen of Inez Fressange appeared directly between the two.

"Yes Akito, you could die.  We don't know if are ability to create jump fields is stable enough to transport humans."

"But he did it before remember, on Earth!" Erina said hotly.

Inez's screen turned to face Erina, "It could have been influenced by the Jovian mecha."

Losing some control Erina shouted, "What about his jump from Mars then?"

Still in her cool and calculated voice, "Again Jovian mecha was present, it could have influenced the jump."

Akito raised his finger and asked if they still needed his presence or if they wished to continue their talk along.  After getting no response from either he bussed his tray and left to his room.  The idea of being a test subject didn't really appeal to him, nor did the fact it could kill him.  Arriving in his room and popping a Gekiganger rom into his player he sat down.

His unobstructed view of his favorite anime lasted for a few minutes before his door chimed.

"Who is it?" he called from his side of the door, 'Probably that nut bar Captain.'

"It's Inez."

Shocked she made a public appearance Akito allowed her access to his room, "Is this about the tests?"

"Yes, Akito despite the danger it could help us immensely," she stated as she found a place to sit.

Running his hands through his hair, "I know, but I don't want to die, just like everybody else on this ship."

Taking his hand in hers, "The danger isn't as great as I may have made it seem, at least give it some thought please.  It could save many lives."

'Or it could destroy me," he thought as he nodded. "I'll think about it."

Realizing that would be the best answer she could hope for at the present time Inez retired to her room.  Akito now set about weighing his options.  He could risk his life in these tests or do nothing.  'I'm already piloting to save them, isn't that enough?  I could be a hero though.  I need some air.'  

To help clear his head he headed to the observation deck to cool his heels.  He arrived a few minutes later after taking several detours along the way to bypass Megumi, Yurika, and Ryoko.  Stretching out on the false grass he let out a large sigh. "It really is nice in this room…" he said to himself.

"Is it?" a female voice stated from his side.

Jumping from the shock and praying it wasn't one of his would-be girlfriends, Akito scanned for the origin of the voice.  "Ruri-chan, I didn't notice you in here."

Miss Hoshino nodded at him before saying, "I was under that impression as well."

Sitting up next to the young girl, "I never saw you in here before, taking a break?"

"I was forced to come here.  The captain believes I spend to much time on the bridge with Omoikane." Under her breath she added 'baka'.

"Have to admit I hardly see you outside of there myself.  It's not so bad is it?"

"It is nice, but why are you hear?" she said with a small smile on her face.

"I have a big question on my mind and hoped being here could help me with it," he said as he turned to face her.

"If you believe it would help, tell me what it is."

"I wouldn't want to burden you Ruri." He smiled at her thinking, 'and she's a little kid I don't know if she could help.'

As if reading his mind, "Do not disregard my opinion based on age, adults are idiots for that."

Rubbing the back of his head, "Sorry about that, I forget how mature you are sometimes."

Blushing softly under the compliment, "It is forgiven if you tell me the situation."

Nodding to the platinum haired tech, Akito told her of the proposed tests, the risks, and his feelings about it.  Ruri for her part kept silent while he told her about his worries and feelings.  When he finished she asked, "Where would you stand to gain the most?"

Thinking a few moments he replied, "I guess I could do more good if I underwent the tests."

Sensing she could help if she prodded more, "Why would that be 'more good?'

"It could help us win the war, and that would benefit everybody…"

'If the war ends, I'll be alone again,' Ruri fathomed and lowered her head.

Not noticing her change in demeanor Akito continued, "Everybody could go home and be with their families again and follow their dreams."

'Family…' the word struck her like a blow to the stomach, "What about those without family?"

Akito finally took notice of Ruri's change in composure, "Ruri, are you ok? Did I say something that offended you?" He put a hand on her shoulder, 'Great she tries to help me and I say something to upset her…poor girl knowing only war.'

Looking at him, "I have no family."

Confused he said, "Ruri…you have a family I took you to meet them."

"I don't know them…how can they be my family," her words coming out slowly and holding a bit of sadness I them.

"At least you have a family Ruri.  When I was your age I'd already lost mine and had to live in an orphanage."

'I have exposed to much of my feelings on this matter,' Ruri thought as she stood up, "I apologize for my outbreak, you are correct.  I will take my leave now."

Nodding to her he spoke before she left, "I'll do the tests.  If anything it will give me a few minutes peace from Inez and Erina."  In the back of his mind he thought, 'but how will I tell Yurika?  She goes ballistic whenever I'm in some sort of unnecessary danger.'

Ruri headed back to the bridge, feeling she followed the Captain's orders well enough, and Akito headed back to Inez's lab area to inform her of his willingness to participate in the tests.

On the bridge, Yurika was bored again. 'With no enemies to fight and the ship on auto-pilot, this place gets boring fast.' She surveyed the bridge for the umpteenth time noting Minato doing her nails, Megumi reading a manga, and Nagare sleeping on a chair.

Ruri re-entered the bridge and took her usual set in front of Omoikane's main interface node.

Looking down at the girl, "Ruri, I thought I asked you to take a break for awhile."

"I have done as you asked, Tenkawa-san can vouch for me," she said as she placed her hands on the control panel.

"Akito is at the observation deck! Great! Where is Jun when I need him to cover?" Yurika rambled enthusiastically as she made her plans to meet her beloved.

"He was at the observation deck.  He has left to inform  Fressange-san that he will assist in her boson jump tests."

Megumi raised her head, "He's going to help her, isn't that dangerous?"  She looked over at Ruri. Despite her falling out with him, Megumi's feelings clearing etched on her face.

As realization hit her, Yurika stepped into action and headed towards the Aestivalis hanger bay to put a stop to it.

Minato smiled, "Where's her heart on her sleeve…it's so cute isn't it Ruri-Ruri?"

Hoping to sidestep the conversation, "I'm only twelve, matters of grown-up affection is to vast for me."

Megumi and Minato raised they're eyebrows as images of her singing at the talent show replayed in their minds.  They made no further comments as Ruri had successfully linked to the ship's main computer and was lost in her own world.

"You lied to them Ruri."

"I did no such think Omoikane." Ruri mentally spoke to her friend.

The AI replied, "You forget that as my memory is open for your observation, yours is open to mine."

"I still fail to see any correlation between my memory and adult feelings."

Omoikane opened a vid-screen with Ruri singing.  "That was directed towards somebody."

Ruri blushed despite herself, "You wrote that song."

"I have feelings for him as well, a sense of great gratitude, he saved my sentience and protects us all from harm," it claimed as it shut down the vid-screen.

Getting desperate, "Can we stop this please?  I wish to work now." 

Omoikane obliged it's master and opened the files requested, those of orphanages in the Utopia colony for the last fifteen years.  Sensing what was being sought the computer found and displayed what it thought she wanted to see.

The next few days flew by with extreme haste.  Yurika was hard set against allowing Akito to undergo the jump tests without a failsafe system to protect him.  Akito spent much of his time watching Gekiganger 3 in his room while attempting to avoid the girls, and their attempts to persuade him from the tests.

Finally after three days of bartering Inez formulated a failsafe that Yurika agreed was acceptable and the time of the first tests were set.  Upon learning about the failsafe right before the test, Akito was furious.

"How can you endanger two lives with this!" he all but screamed over the com-link in his Aesti.

Rubbing her ears Inez spoke, "She will be directly linked to you IFS so hypothetically whatever allows you to boson jump will allow her to as well."

Looking down at Ruri, "Did you even bother to ask her if she wanted to do this?"

Without even looking at him, "They did Tenkawa-san.  I agreed to act as the failsafe as I am most qualified."

Another vid-screen opened showing a very cheerful Yurika, "Isn't it great that we can trust Ruri-chan to keep you safe Akito dearest?"

After Yurika's declaration, Ruri thought, 'I do want to keep him safe…but why?' 

Patting Ruri's head, Akito spoke, "Are you sure you want to risk this Ruri-chan?  I can still fly back to the hanger and drop you off."

Showing one of her seldom smiles Ruri shook her head, "It is safer this way."

Admitting defeat Akito relented and received the directions on how to instigate the jump.  Inez informed the duo that all they needed to do was focus on a place and the jump field would take care of the rest.  The entire ship wished them luck, Yurika blowing a kiss for luck to them, and a final count down was started.

10…

Over his comm., "Deploying CC's"

9…

Inez reported, "All signs green."

8…

7…

Ruri and Akito began to fidget nervously.

6…

5…

4…

 Inez piped over the intercom again, "Picture your location now."

Erina crossed her fingers and prayed for success, 'If this works, my job is secure!'

3…

2…

Jun, viewing the computer read outs, commented, "Jump field opened."

1…

Activation

Akito's body began to glow with strange signals and pictured the aft of the Nadesico.  Ruri looked up at Akito and a thought entered her mind, the distracting thoughts prevented her from noticing how now her body was glowing.  The Aestivalis disappeared.

Ruri opened her eyes and was shocked. She was no longer in the cockpit.  She looked around her new surroundings and called out, "Tenkawa-san, Tenkawa, Nadesico, Anyone?"  She received no response.  She attempted to calm herself as usual and noted her surroundings.  Red sand, a nanomachine cloud overhead, and Nergal buildings in the distance.  Then it dawned on her, she was on Mars, but a Mars untouched by the Jovian's.

The shock finally overwhelmed the young girl and she collapsed onto the barren Martian soil.

End Chapter 1

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry if Ruri seemed a bit OOC in this opening chapter but that is how I think she felt.

A young girl that has no real family, ( sperm doners don't count as family in my book) is threatened with the fact that she will be taken from those that do care for her.

This was set right before the memory mix-up when they were experimenting with jumping.  I think I have most of the spelling and terms correct but if not I'm sure reviewers will pounce upon them.

The premise is set and I plan to continue, hope you enjoyed this so far.

Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com)


	2. Recon

Standard Disclaimer

I own nothing of Nadesico or its crew.

To check for the owners I advice going to the advfilms Website.

I hope I don't make too much a mess of the story line or make the charters to OOC, still I hope you like this fic and continue to read it.

First version 6/6/02

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anata No Ichiban Ni Naritai

Chapter 2- Reconnaissance 

Ruri opened her eyes and found she had again changed location.  Instead of being outdoors on Mars, she was inside a room in a medical ward.  A quick survey of the room proved that she was still on Mars. Her head was bandaged, and a nurse was walking over to her.

Taking the chair next to the bed the nurse spoke, "Glad to see you awake.  How are you feeling, Miss…?

Ruri sat up in the bed and answered, "Hoshino Ruri, I am fine.  How did I get here, did you find anything wrong with me?"

The nurse smiled at the young girl, "Akito brought you in, and aside from the nasty bump to the head you sustained you're free to go.  Shall I call your parents?"

Ruri's eyes widened when the nurse told her who brought her in, 'Akito's here? Why didn't I see him? Why isn't he here now?' She looked at the nurse, and noted that her hesitance to answer brought a shadowed look to her face.

"You don't have a family do you…poor dear.  Is that why you were outside the orphanage?" 

A slew of emotions were coursing through Ruri. Anger for being left behind, fear because she only knew of Akito's presence, and relief that at least one person she knew was still around.  She collected her thoughts, and after a moment replied, "Yes, that is correct," she chided herself for the small lie but continued, "you said Tenkawa-san left me here, can you tell me where he is?"

The nurse looked at the girl in front of her and began making plans to find room for her in the military orphanage.  "Akito-kun is out in the hybrid forest behind the orphanage. Do you feel strong enough to walk that far?"

'I have no choice I need to know what has happened to us.' She nodded and slid off the bed only to suffer a mild cause of dizziness. Gripping a nearby table for stability she addressed the nurse again, "I'll be fine, thank you for your concern."

The nurse smiled again and told her how to find the exit.  Ruri thanked her again for her assistance and left the room.  Her mind was plagued with questions about what had transpired.  She knew the Nadesico was nowhere nearby, Mars was still under Nergal control, and the Aestivalis had disappeared.  Hoping Akito had some of the answers she sought to find him.  As she passed several doors it dawned on her that she was indeed inside an orphanage, but something was strange about it.

Finding the exit was a simple task for her, and spotting the oddly colored trees nearby just as easy.  'The trees have red leaves, I wonder what they were hybrid with?' she questioned as she looked for Akito's yellow and black jump suit.

Sitting up in one of the taller trees a young boy spotted a girl approaching his location.  'Isn't that the girl I found outside this morning?'  He climbed a bit higher up the tree hoping not to be spotted.  Unfortunatly for him, he put a bit to much weight on a branch and caused it to make a loud snap, giving him away immediately as he heard the girl call out.

"Excuse me, have you seen a man in a yellow and black suit?"

Looking down at her from his perch, "Who are you looking for, your dad?"

Her voice beginning to become soar from speaking so loud to the young boy she gestured for him to climb down.  'He looks vaguely familiar, shaggy brown hair…eyes…'

The boy didn't obey her hand signal and yelled again, "Who is it?"

"Akito Tenkawa," she yelled again and made another attempt to coax the boy down.

Looking down at her he calculated the distance, 'Hope this doesn't hurt too much.' He proceeded to jump off the branch and fall about 15 feet to the ground, which he hit rolling.  Ruri looked at the act of stupidity and couldn't resist the urge in her, "Baka."

Tucking the blue crystal necklace back under his shirt, "What do you want with me?"

In disbelieve, "You…are Akito Tenkawa, the boy that took me to the medical station?"

Getting a good look at her, "Yeah, I saw you laying on the ground on the outskirts of the compound."

'Akito…he's my age, this is his orphanage!  I went back in time.  How is that possible?' She stared blankly for a few moments until Akito tapped her shoulder.

"Are you ok?" he asked in a low voice, 'She's kinda cute.'

Shaken from her revelry, she lowered her head to hide her eyes. "I…I don't know."  The stress of her situation became too much for her to bare and her eyes began to moisten.

Unfamiliar as to how to react to the situation, Akito put his hands on her shoulders.  "You'll be ok.  If you don't want to go home you can stay here."

Calming her self, she tried to speak evenly, but it came out broken despite her efforts, "Thank you Tenkawa-san."

Helping her off the ground, "I just did what anybody else would have done in the situation."

"Still, thank you."  Any further comments were cut off as her stomach began to rumble.

"Do you like fish sticks?" he asked her.

Looking at Akito, Ruri noticed how his demeanor was different now.  He appeared more withdrawn and depressed.  His voice was also softer and lacked his usual passion.  'He sounds like me.' She nodded to his question, "Yes, but why do you ask?"

Taking her hand he lead her back towards the door, "Because you're going to eat mine."

Ruri didn't argue as she defiantly felt hungry, and had no other way of obtaining food.  She was lead to a small cafeteria with a few other children, some older than her, but most were younger.  She sat at the back table and waited while Akito gathered their supper and returned to her.

A few of the other children noted how 'mopy Tenkawa' had brought a stranger in, but they lost interest as after he gave her the tray he left.

Ruri looked at Akito's retreating form in shock, 'he gave me his food then leaves without saying a word?'  She began to eat the meal set out in front of her noting that it was in fact one of the worst meals she ever ate.

Eating the bland food, Ruri pondered her current situation and what she had to do.  'I'm in the past; I need to learn how this happened.  Then I need to learn how to return to my own time.' She gathered that her current state had to have been caused by the Boson jump.  Then as a matter of deductive logic figured the best place to go for answers would be the Nergal mainframe.

'I hope they have a computer I can use.'  Thoughts of altered time-lines, time paradoxes, and other possible tragedies that could result from her being like this filled her mind.  So deep in thought was she that she didn't notice the older girl walking over to her table.

Taking a seat across from her, "Who are you?"

Ruri looked straight into the girls pink eyes, "Hoshino Ruri, do you have a computer here?"

Sneering slightly, "Friendly aren't you, no wonder you were with Tenkawa."

Ruri noticed the twin light blue haired pigtails, "Did I offend you?"

"Why don't you speak with emotion?  You like a doll or something?"

Picking up her tray, Ruri gave up talking to the venom-ant girl and headed for the door.  She was stopped a few feet short as the same girl grabbed her hand and spun her around.

The girl's voice rising in anger, "Don't ignore me.  Think you're to good for us or something?"

"No, but I have a task to accomplish," she replied while attempting to free her hand from the other girls grasp.

"Fine," the blue haired girl said as she pushed Ruri away with excessive force.  She smiled as Ruri lost her footing and toppled over, covered with her remaining food. Then she noticed Ruri's hands.

"You have those things on your hands like Akito does!  You're a worker," each word full of disgust. 

Squeezing her hands into fists to control the building anger in her, Ruri stood, dusted herself off and left. 'Akito already has his IFS?'

She wandered about the various hallways and corridors until she came across a few open doors.  She noted that each door had a metal plate affixed to it with two names on each.  'I know those names…well the sur-names.'  Reading more names off a few more doors, Ruri realized exactly what type of orphanage she was in, a military-officer war orphan's.  'They must have thought I was a daughter of an officer due to my clothing.'  She thought as she looked at the Nergal emblem on her shoulder.   'Explains why it has only a few children but still looks very well ran.'

She looked into a few of the open doors and was greeted by the sight of typical children's rooms.  Posters, dolls, cloths, and other objects kids would have.  'No computers here…'  

She wondered the halls of the orphanage for another twenty minutes before the nurse from before approached her again.  With her head cleared Ruri finally took note of the woman's appearance.  The nurse had red hair that went down to her chin and green eyes.

"Oh Ruri, did you find Akito alright?  What happened to your cloths?"

Stopping to face the elder woman, "I found him, and a girl found my manner of speech unacceptable."

"The kids don't take to new comers easily," she said with a touch of sadness.

"Baka."

Dismissing the insult, she continued, "Will you be staying with us Ruri, it wouldn't be any trouble we have an open bed."

Knowing she didn't have a choice, she needed shelter and had no money to pay for it, Ruri answered positively.

"You'll be staying with Tenkawa Akito, he's the only one currently without a roommate"

Ruri bowed to the nurse, "Thank you, ma'am."

Smiling, "Takeshi Kyoko."

"Takeshi-san, do you have a computer that I could use?"

'Girl knows what she wants,' Kyoko thought. She gestured for Ruri to follow her and lead the young girl to a small room with five computers. "Nergal funds this place so we have many benefits.  Since you'll be staying with us, you'll need to fill out some paper work," she told her as she called up a document file, "after that you can do what you please.  Lights out is at 10 o'clock."

Ruri again bowed to the nurse as she left, and set to work on the form.  She embellished her story in a few places as to not draw attention to her other, younger, self on earth.  She sent the completed form to the director's office then began her real work. 

Hacking into the Nergal mainframe posed more difficulty than she had expected, mainly due using a lower grade computer than she was used to.  When she did gain access she checked the current state of jump gate technology, locations of scientists in the field, and for any other information that could prove useful.  She stopped her hack when she saw a recent file record of an unknown boson jump inside of the utopia colony.  'They know about the jump that brought me here, or was it another?'

Shaking off the thought of being captured and interrogated by Nergal she pressed on. Finding only bits and pieces of the whole; she shut the computer off in frustration.  The sky had already darkened and she was bathed in blackness.  'The moons of Mars don't illuminate the surface well.'  Looking at the wall clock she realized lights out would occur in ten minutes, and she didn't know the location of her room.

As she made her way out of the room, the young Akito walked up to her, "I heard that you'll be staying in my room."

"If it is a problem, I can seek an empty room," she asked out of respect but hoped he would let her stay. 'He is the only link I have to my life…even if he is my age now.'

Shaking his head, "It's ok, and they don't really like to have us separate. I'm the exception because… He noticed her disheveled clothing, " I should have warned you of Maki."

Looking at her still soiled cloths, "The girl in the cafeteria?"

Akito nodded again and took Ruri to their room.  It was a small room, no bigger than her room aboard the Nadesico.  She was shocked to see how empty the room was, aside from the bunk bed, dresser, and worktable it was empty, except for a plush Gekiganger doll.

"There are a few spare sets of cloths in the closet if you want to change before bed," he said while standing outside the door.

Smiling at him, "Thank you Tenkawa-san, I will."

"Don't call me Tenkawa-san…makes me feel old."

'Yes, he isn't my elder now,' she looked at him, 'he still is taller than me though.' She entered the modest room, sealed the door and changed into a plain yellow pajama combination and sat down.

Waiting for permission to enter his room Akito thought about the strange girl, 'How did she get here, she's really cute too, platinum hair and yellowish eyes,' he allowed himself a small smile as he thought of how he had actually done somebody good today.  He allowed himself another moment or two of happiness before old memories resurfaced and he returned to his mild depression. 

Ruri opened to door for him and he walked back in.  He blushed softly when he noticed this girl, Ruri, had put on his pajamas, but he didn't tell her.  'Yellow really doesn't suit her to well.'  He climbed into the top bunk clutched his plush toy and closed his eyes.  "You can request your own cloths in the morning…if you want."

Ruri made a sound of understanding. She felt a bit nervous about sleeping in the same room as Akito, but Ruri turned the light off and climbed into her bed, 'what if I can't go back…can I just stay with Akito, or will that alter time?' Despite all the sleep she had already, she felt exhausted from all the activity she had done searching for her way back to her own time.  The thought that she may never return occurred to her, but she quickly dismissed it.

Thoughts of possible futures filled both children's minds as sleep over came them.  They didn't even hear the sounds of the ATV that approached to location where Ruri had appeared earlier that day.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was going to have this proceed really quickly in the scope I had set for the entire story.

But one of my pre-readers offered the suggesting that instead of aiming for a quick story (about 4-5 chapters) I pace myself and add more story and develop things more clearly.

I took his advice and well as you can see this chapter took up only about one day.

I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and if you spot any plot holes or grammar mistakes, I apologize.

Yes Ruri did go back in time and has meet up with the younger Akito.  I have Akito a bit more depressed and withdrawn, as the memory of his dead parents is still fairly fresh in his mind.  

Next chapter- what will Nergal do once the noticed a boson jump occurred on mars?

Thanks to my pre-readers Chewy and Golden Kitsune 

Till then Ja-mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com)


	3. Acceptance

Standard Disclaimer

I own nothing of Nadesico or it's characters.  I created a few to assist in the telling of said story but I really don't care I any readers use them for their own selfish gain :) 

Hope you read and review for me thanks again.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anata no Ichiban Ni Naritai

Chapter 3- Acknowledgement

"I still can't believe you allowed another child into this facility without consulting me." The orphanage director bellowed.

Kyoko whipped a spot of sweat from her for head, "But sir, she was injured and obviously needs someplace to stay.

"She's been here three days and do you know how many times she's used the computer network?" he added by handing her a print out of log-on times.

Looking over the report.  "Sir, you know how most shy children have on-line friends now a days.  I bet she is just contacting some old acquaintances.  It must be really scary for her like this."

"And how does an orphan have prior computer skill and have an ICS?"

"She was wearing Nergal issued clothing when we found her, it is possible her parents taught her and provided access before their…demise," Kyoko pleaded, not wanting the poor girl to be expelled.

"How do we even know her parents are dead, she could be a runaway or worse," the director readjusted his position in his chair.

"If she is a runaway her parents will eventually come for her.  I really think we should allow her to stay, Akito-kun really seems to have taken a shine to her."

The director knew as well as Kyoko that Akito Tenkawa was a special case.  Although his parents were not in the military before their deaths he was allowed to stay.  The men that brought him in stressed he should be attended to as if his parents were generals.  They never argued the point as doing so could result in a funding cut.  

The director nodded, "Is that why you didn't reassign a male roommate for him, boys and girls sharing rooms is highly odd you know."

Kyoko mentally smiled as her using Akito to scare the director worked perfectly.  "That is exactly why sir.  This is the first time since Akito moved in that he actually talks to somebody."

Again the director nodded, as Tenkawa's psychological file stressed how his parents' death had caused him to withdraw into himself.  "I guess we can allow this to continue for a while, but if this Hoshino girl causes any problems she's out on her ass.

Smiling sweetly at the older man, "You big softy I knew I could count on you," she leaned over the desk and kissed him on the cheek.

Blushing softly, "Don't 'softy' me Kyoko-chan…I can really get into trouble over this."

Nodding to her husband, "But you still do the right thing, that's why I married you.  Well I have my rounds to do, bye." She smiled at her husband again and left his office to check on the other children.

Left alone in his office, "I just hope you know what you're talking about."

In another part of the orphanage Ruri was looking over the wardrobe that she was provided with.  She was given four standard uniforms, two pairs of powder blue pajamas, a cheap dress for formal occasions, and her original uniform. She hung them up in the closet next to Akito's clothing and sat down.

She replayed the previous days accounts in her mind.  During the past two days she spent considerable time on the computer system looking for as much information on Boson jumping as possible.  The results were dim.  'Not surprising, we were only beginning to understand the process back when I first phased here.' Aside from her work on the computer the other children made her life hell.  Commenting on her rather unique skin tone and hair.  Terms such as freak and doll were now common identifiers for her. 'Children are idiots, is that how Akito-san thinks of me?'

She looked at her roommate, who was trying, all-be-it fruitlessly, to reattach an arm to his plushies' body. She smiled when Akito let out a small curse as he poked himself with the needle.  The last two days had also been spent getting to know her one time elder.  Ruri noticed the difference in the younger Akito.  He was more reserved and kept mostly to himself, but would help her anytime she needed it, weather requested or not.

'He doesn't judge me,' she smiled, 'maybe being in this time isn't so bad.'

Ruri stopped her current thought and frowned.  She knew she had to try and get home…to her real home.  Thoughts about Akito would only distract her from her mission, but she couldn't help herself from acting.

"Would you like some assistance Akito-san?" she asked him from behind.

Looking over his shoulder at the girl that now shared his room, "You…think you can?"

She stuck her hand out and waited for him to place the doll in her hand.  When he didn't react she grew mildly frustrated.  'Do all children require constant directing?'

She then spoke with a hint of agitation, "Give him to me and I will fix it."

Akito tentatively handed his prized and only possession to her, "Thank you Ruri."

Ruri examined the doll and made her calculations, 'I can improve it.' Quickly she wrote down a few items she'd need and handed it to the bewildered Akito.

"Get these items for me and I'll fix him," she smiled once she received the look of acknowledgement from Akito.

"Be back soon," Akito chirped as he ran from the room to procure the items on Ruri's list.

'Where can I find this stuff though?' he pondered.  His first stop was a utility closet next to the nurse's station.  He snuck in and began pilfering all the items on the list.  Just as he grabbed the final item a sound registered in his ears, the door opened.

"What do we have here, the loner Tenkawa stealing?"

Akito nearly jumped out of his skin when he identified the voice, "No Maki I am not."

Maki smirked from her position by the door, "Then what's with all the stuff in your hands?"

Lifting his head slightly to look the older girl in her eyes, "Ruri asked me to get this stuff so she can help me fix Geki."

Walking over to him, "You and that freak girl seem to chum around a lot.  The loser and the sick doll."

"Leave me alone Maki, I don't have time for this," he pleaded.

"Fine, what do I care what you lowly workers do.  Being the daughter of an Admiral raises me above your petty class." With a final smirk at her pray, Maki spun around giving her dress a swirl and left.

Akito sighed in relief as Maki left, expecting her to belittle him a lot more, he left the room and shut the door.

He headed straight back to their room, while attempting to keep his purloined goods a secret.  He walked backwards to assure he wasn't followed, but that left his front open.

'Why does she need all this stuff?' 

For the second time that day Akito was nearly scared to death, as a hand was placed on his shoulder.

"Akito-kun," he knew the voice was the nurse's, "why do you have all those things?"

He looked into the face of the nurse, "Please don't tell on me Kyoko-san! R..Ruri asked for me to get this stuff so she can fix my Gekiganger plushy."

Kyoko was shocked.  Akito looked near tears as he pleaded for her not to tell on him or Ruri.  'He's still an emotional wreck after all this time, poor boy.'

She made some soothing noises to calm the frightened child, and assured him he wouldn't be in trouble.  She dapped a handkerchief to his moistening eyes and told him to hurry along to his room, which he did.

Back in the bedroom stuffing was lying all over the floor, and Ruri held the hollowed out carcass of Gekiganger.  She was drawing a blueprint of the revisions she was planning on making to it.  Her stomach rumbled. 'Not hunger again.  I cannot abide by the terrible food they serve.'  Ruri got up and headed to the dresser drawer that Akito provided her with.

She pulled out a near empty box of saltine crackers she had taken from the cafeteria on the second day of her stay.  As she finished off the box and set a mental reminder to obtain another box that night, Akito returned.

The sight before him was chaos.  Stuffing was scattered everywhere, as if discarded in great haste. He saw the hollow husk of his cherished toy and looked to Ruri for an explanation.

"Did you get what I asked you to?" she said as she spat out a little bits of cracker.

Akito set the assorted items down, "All of them.  You didn't kill Geki did you?"

"He isn't alive so I cannot kill him, and do not worry," she smiled again, "he will be upgraded."

Akito's worry eased away with the smile the girl offered him.  He sat on the lower bunk and watched as Ruri began working.  As she worked, Ruri found herself smiling again.  'I've been smiling a lot since I've arrived here.' 

Time passed quickly as Ruri's surgery progressed.  For a brief time, Akito had left to gather some food for them to eat while she patched the doll.  Ruri passed on the food, not wanting to have the taste in her mouth, announced that she had finished.

Akito looked dumbstruck, "He looks the same."

The doll then turned its head and looked at Akito, speakers declaring, "Target locked, proceed with destruction."  Gekiganger then started to shoot cotton balls from its hands.

"He has been upgraded to Gekiganger V. 2.0" Ruri announced.

Geki was quickly lifted into Akito's arms and he hugged it. He thanked Ruri profusely for her work and apologized for doubting her.  She remarked that it was payment for allowing her to stay in his room, but blushed all the same.

As the young children experimented with Gekiganger's new features a Nergal van arrived at the orphanage. The men inside reviewing a print out of possible sites of infiltration exited the vehicle.  Several men in black suits approached the front gate and were greeted by Mrs. Takeshi. 

"Gentlemen, it's almost lights out tonight.  Why are you here disrupting our environment?" she asked of the approaching men, noting the Nergal emblem on their coats.

The smallest man spoke, "Miss, we're looking for any suspicious people you may have seen here over the past few days." 

"It's Mrs., and what do you mean suspicious."

The small man again spoke, "We are lead to believe a potential spy has infiltrated the Utopia colony.  Are reconosense pin-points they're arrival point to be just about fifty yards outside of this compound."

"I'm sorry but we haven't noticed any stran…" thought of Ruri entered her mind.

"Ma'am?"

Kyoko shook her head, "It's nothing, just a headache.  We haven't seen anything like that around her. Now if you'll excuse me I have work to attend to before bed."

As the door shut in front of them the middleman spoke, " She's hiding something."

"Obviously, we'll put this instillation under surveillance and see what we come up with." The short man replied.

The tallest man finally spoke, "But what type of information could a spy gather at an orphanage?"

"That's not for us to worry about, we just have to find and eliminate the threat."

They returned to their van and returned to base.  Upon arrival they ordered an increased amount of surveillance be utilized for finding the threat.

Ten o'clock reared its head and the children were hustled off to there rooms for bed.  Akito again left the room allowing Ruri the privacy to change into her new P.J.'s. He thought of how this girl had invaded his life, just like another had when is parents were alive.  His revelry about the dark blue haired girl was cut short as Ruri signaled he could come in.

Akito's face turned bright pink when he saw Ruri in her new pajamas.  "Kawaii."

The single word set off a chain reaction in Ruri, whose face turned to match Akito's.  She quickly climbed into her bed and turned to face the wall.  Akito, thinking he upset the girl, apologized before turning the light off and climbing into his bed.  Neither child had sleep on their mind however.

Two hours into lights out, Ruri stole from her bed and into the hallway.  She snuck her way into the pantry where she had found her sustenance.  Gathering a few boxes of crackers to live off of for the next few days, she turned to leave. 'Why did his words have such a strong affect on me; more so than when he was my elder.  I must banish these thoughts.  I'll be home soon and this will be nothing but a memory.'

She crept slowly back into the adjacent kitchen but stopped when she heard a scraping sound. Her whole body tensed as images of the potential burglar entered her mind.  'I must act my part to protect my temporary home.'

Grabbing a nearby frying pan, she waited for the sound to get closer.  Clutching the pan tighter she anticipated a ruthless criminal stalking closer to her.  When the sound was in range, she closed her eyes and sprang from her hiding place and swung the pan.

The target was so shocked by the assault he never had time to duck.  The pan came crashing down on his head, which sent him to the floor.  For the first time since her attack Ruri opened her eyes to see her burglar, Akito.

She dropped the pan and hurried to the boy's side.  He was knocked unconscious.  The bump on his head steadily growing in size, but no blood was spotted. She cursed herself for her rash actions in assaulting him, while gathering him and her food in her arms.  She later found out that Akito occasionally snuck into the kitchen in attempts to learn how to cook.

With Akito slung over her back piggyback style, she retreated to their room.  Ruri sent off a silent prayer to whoever was listening to not be discovered.  Her encumbered walk was made more difficult as she passed several open doors.

Eventually she arrived back to the shared domicile.  Dropping the crackers first, she placed the dazed boy on her bed. 'I can't lift him up to his own, he will have to make do.'

While she was checking his pupils to assure he didn't have a concussion, she noticed his necklace.

"He has a CC with him," she said above a whisper.

'A CC…a CC, I forgot I need those to Boson Jump!'  Her oversight now made painfully clear, she had no way home.  To obtain the CC's she needed to jump home she'd either have to steal Akito's and risk altering the time-line, or break into a heavily fortified Nergal base. 'Did he use the CC or did he lose it…he didn't have it when I met him.'

She took a seat on her bed next to Akito.  "I'm stuck here.  I cannot obtain any CC's without great risk to the time-line."  The words she spoke sinking into her mind.  She was trapped with no hope of recovery.  She would have to adapt to her new situation, with the new people. A lone tear traced her cheek as she admitted to herself that she wouldn't see her friends on the Nadesico for a long time, if ever. 

She lied down in crushing defeat.  She drew her body into the fetal position and fell asleep, midway through the night Akito unconsciously drew closer to the girl that emanated a deep sadness.  They woke with Akito still holding her.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Author notes.

Yes Ruri is acting odd but the shock of realizing she's trapped in the past COULD do that to her.  The time-line has already been altered by her presence but I've already got plans for that.  I'm not going to make any MAJOR alterations to the time line…but it is my story so I guess its understandable.

I'm trying to get how a military group would set about tracking down a rouge spy, but could be doing it wrong.

And yes Gekiganger is now upgraded :)

Next chapter- Ruri tries to adapt to the new situation, but her previous hack jobs have alerted Nergal of her presence.  The other children's reaction to the freaky duo.

Hope you still like it

First version 6/13/2002

Ja Mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com)


	4. The Hammer Falls

Standard Disclaimer!  
  
Being a poor college student and not being born in Japan, I find that I don't have either the capital or the connections to say I own anything of Nadesico. I am merely boring them to create a story. While some characters were created by me, I don't mind if you use them.  
  
This story, hopefully, is going to cover most of the Nadesico time-line so don't expect a sudden end.  
  
Unfortunately this isn't my only project. It is one of three. And being such is in a rotation of work, a chapter of Anata, then ood, then the Mst of CoaEG.  
  
Well, shall we begin.yes, yes we shall. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------  
  
Anata no Ichiban Ni Naritai Chapter-4 "The Hammer Falls"  
  
"Checking the computer logs of an orphanage, what's the point!" the underpaid, irritated Nergal data analysist said for the twentieth time in the last hour.  
  
For the last two weeks said orphanage was under heavy surveillance, wire tapes, bugs, and all computer logs were to be gone over. Most of the workers didn't even know why they were searching for anything strange from such an odd location. The personnel never questioned orders though, they all worked as told.  
  
The angry man was about to call it a night when, "Hello what's this." By pure accident the man stumbled over a hacked file in a secure file location linked to the orphanage. "Bingo!"  
  
The tech reported his findings as ordered to his superiors and was given the rest of the week off with pay.  
  
The tall man, "I knew that the woman was hiding something from us."  
  
Looking over the print out of the hack the short man replied, "Agreed, whoever did this was a computer expert. We have something to go off of now."  
  
Grinning, "All we need to do now is question a few people there and this 'problem' is solved," the tall man said.  
  
Adjusting his sidearm, "Get Erickson, we move now," finished the small man as they made their plans. ----------------------  
  
".And that is how you make scrambled eggs," Akito said proudly to Ruri.  
  
Looking skeptically at him, she tried a bite, and then another, and another, soon the plate was empty. "Much better than the other food served."  
  
He didn't know how to react; somebody had actually eaten his food and liked it. Taking the plate away from her and putting it in the washer, Akito took another look at Ruri. The pair had been spending a great deal of their free time together ever since she suddenly appeared. Whether in class, although Ruri seemed to know all the lessons already, free time, or even at lights out the two were in each other's company.  
  
They didn't talk to each other a lot, just felt comfortable with a person that had a similar air about them, despair. The other kids noticed this, and after the initial shock of the creepy boy having a friend, one equally as creepy, most stopped caring.  
  
The kitchen incident from two weeks ago actually bolstered their friendship. After a few embarrassing moments of staring into each other's eyes waking up in each other's arms, they laughed. Akito didn't have friends, not since Yurika left for Earth those few years ago. Now it seemed that he had another one.  
  
Letting a brief smile pass, they left the kitchen without being noticed, and headed back towards their room. Passing the front hall on their way, Ruri stopped and looked out the window. A sudden panic gripped her as she clutched Akito's hand and drug him off at a quicker rate of speed, knocking Nurse Takeshi over in the hustle.  
  
The green-eyed woman said to herself, "What's gotten into those two?" Of all those at the facility none were as shocked or glad to see the two together. Kyoko felt as if Ruri was sent solely to befriend the Tenkawa boy.  
  
Taking a look out the window to see if something had scared them, she took was afraid. The Nergal van from before had reappeared, but this time she doubted she could get them to leave easily. ----------------------  
  
Out of breath and panting, "What's wrong Ruri, why did you start to run?"  
  
Spinning to face the young Akito, Ruri was split, one part of her wanted to tell the boy exactly what was happening, the other half demanding a lie. The later half won out. A plan to save herself from capture formed in her mind.  
  
"I hacked into the Nergal mainframe looking for info on my past," the former voice calling her a coward.  
  
"You're.past?" Akito said as he climbed up to his bed.  
  
Resigned to her fate and the deception of Akito, "My parents, something happened to them and I wanted to know what, but now those Nergal people are after me."  
  
Waves of nostalgia washed over him, "Just like me.what are you going to do?"  
  
Taking the chair by the room's desk, "I don't know, hopefully they don't suspect to much." Her mind doing calculations on what damage to the time- line would occur if she were found out.  
  
Akito took Geki into his arms, "They won't do anything to you will they?"  
  
"If they do anything, it most likely would be imprisonment."  
  
No! He couldn't allow it. He lost his parents, his friend Yurika, and when he finally got another friend he couldn't lose her too. "What, what if you said you were looking for information on MY parents?"  
  
Ruri, while hoping for this, was surprised. She looked into his eyes and found nothing but conviction in them. 'Just like his elder self.a selfless man.' She knew the men were looking for the hacker responsible for breaking into the Boson Jump files. Those files were oddly connected to the Tenkawa family, why she couldn't decipher. If she did as Akito said, she could get off hook.  
  
It pained her to resort to underhanded tactics to remain safe, but she had no alternative. "You would really do that for me Akito-san?"  
  
Jumping off the bed and looking into her face, "I don't want you to get into trouble."  
  
Akito's words from Peace Land echoed in her head, 'A princess has to have a Knight to protect her.' She had her Knight again; she smiled at him and touched his cheek with her right hand, "Thank you Akito-san."  
  
Akito blushed at the contact and for once she actually thanked him openly. He smiled at her and they began to hatch a plan. ----------------------  
  
In another part of the facility  
  
"This is highly irregular gentlemen. I hope you have a good explanation," the director said to the two suit clad men.  
  
"I assure you Mr. Takeshi, this is not intended to make you look bad. We just want to ask a few children some questions, that's all," the short man said.  
  
Kyoko stormed into the office, "But they're children! How can you do this to children!"  
  
Erickson stood and stopped Kyoko's advance, "We will make this as easy and quick as possible. If you hamper us though we will cut all funding."  
  
Kyoko was about to continue her protest but a look from her husband silenced her. In the no win situation they were in, all they could do was cooperate. They agreed that two of the three men would talk to the children one at a time in room designated for schooling. ----------------------  
  
Erickson dismissed the current child and addressed the small man, "Who's the next child Jackson?"  
  
A flip through a clipboard as the next girl entered and sat, "Hibiki Maki, daughter of Admiral Meia Hibiki."  
  
Maki took a look at them men and sneered, "Can you make this quick gentlemen, I have things to do."  
  
Jackson clenched his hands together; he couldn't stand teenagers, especially spoiled ones. He asked her the standard bluff questions to set the mood. Maki answered them with her typical off temper attitude.  
  
Once the preliminary questions were voiced Erickson took over.  
  
"Have you noticed anybody new lately?"  
  
Without a moments hesitation, "Yeah, Tenkawa's lil playmate."  
  
At the name Tenkawa, Jackson excused himself from the room and headed out to the van.  
  
While he left, Erickson continued, "When did this person show up, and can you tell me anything about them?"  
  
Maki put two and two together and figured the men were looking for Ruri for something, and with an opportunity to be rid of another worker class she opened the floodgates.  
  
"She calls herself Ruri Hoshino. She has an ICS on both hands and spends most of her time with Akito or in the computer room."  
  
Writing down the information with great detail, "And she appeared when?"  
  
"Oh, she's been here about two and a half weeks," and she added just for spite, " she's a real freak all pale with platinum hair."  
  
After he wrote down what Maki said, he dismissed her and waited for Jackson to return. He only needed to wait for about five minutes.  
  
To the returning Jackson, "What scared you off like that?"  
  
"What that girl said, Tenkawa. I didn't think it was possible to be 'the' Tenkawa but it is."  
  
Still in the dark Erickson probed deeper, "Who is this Tenkawa boy anyway?"  
  
"Nobody really of importance, its just Admiral Mitsumaru set up the boy's residency."  
  
That information caused a start from Erickson, "THE Admiral Mitsumaru?"  
  
"The very same. We have a very touchy situation here, if we make a mistake involving the boy we may be out of a job," Jackson stated flatly as he adjusting his necktie.  
  
They both knew it was an understatement. To upset the Admiral on this was considered a great offence. Ever since the accident that caused him to leave Mars, anybody that divulged information or caused slander to the Tenkawa's disappeared.  
  
They shared a moment of silence as the contemplated their next move. A conspiracy was obvious, but to not press forward wouldn't have any benefits either. Jackson read the report of the Hibiki girl and they agreed to question the girl Ruri. ---------------------------  
  
Even though she was expecting it, Ruri was apprehensive about the upcoming meeting. She had made her plan with Akito, knowing that after her talk they would call on him to see if her story checked out.  
  
Ruri took her seat before the two men who introduced themselves as Agent Erickson and Jackson.  
  
Jackson was first to speak, "Miss Hoshino, you recently moved into this orphanage?"  
  
As Ruri opened her mouth to speak Erickson cut her off, "Answer the question already!"  
  
Narrowing her eyes at the small man she realized what they were doing, 'Baka, you played you cards to soon.'  
  
"Yes, I recently found myself.alone and needed shelter."  
  
"Isn't that convenient then, you just happened to find THIS place above all others. What a smart little girl," Erickson emphasized his words to be as belittling as possible.  
  
"Erickson, this is an orphanage, where else would she go?" Jackson countered.  
  
"But isn't it a little TOO simple?"  
  
"It's perfectly normal, calm down and let her continue."  
  
Shrugging off the abrasiveness of the mans words she answered, "I didn't chose to come here, after the incident I was injured. I was brought inside by Akito Tenkawa."  
  
Jackson went over his field notes and realized she was telling the truth, "You use computers a bit, Miss Hoshino?"  
  
Lowering her head, 'A bit, they used to be my life.' Composing herself, " I have used computers before yes."  
  
Erickson bellowed into her face, "THAT'S NOT WHAT HE ASKED YOU!"  
  
Shocking the man, Ruri stood right in his face and retorted, "I believe it WAS what he asked me."  
  
Acting to calm his companion, "Calm down Erickson, it's rude to treat her like this."  
  
They were losing to a girl; Jackson realized it was time for the trump card. "We ask you this because we traced a hack job from the Nergal mainframe back to a computer here. When we checked who was logged in it was you."  
  
They pair were following Ruri's plan perfectly, she countered with, "I was doing a favor for my.friend Akito."  
  
Looking down his nose at her, Erickson spit out, "Friend, didn't think people like you HAD friends."  
  
"A charming young girl like this with no friends, surely you jest. But what did he want you to do for him that involved a Nergal mainframe?" Jackson said in a sickeningly sweet voice while adjusting the hidden camera he had in his pocket.  
  
Sighing heavily she initiated the final part of the plan, "His parents, he wanted me to find out what happened to his parents."  
  
Cutting his concentration Erickson sat down, "T.Thank you Miss Hoshino that is all."  
  
Standing up to leave, she gave them on final address, "Erickson-san you were not a very convincing 'bad cop.' "  
  
After she was out of the room, they contacted the third man out in the van. The man was currently reviewing the hidden camera's footage and doing background checks on the girl's story.  
  
Jackson asked, "Does it check out?"  
  
"From what I have here, it is a very plausible story. The Tenkawa file is in the same location as the Boson Jump info, both heavily classified."  
  
Knowing more than the others, Erickson continued, "We'll have to talk to the boy to see if his story coincides with hers."  
  
Over the channel, "Yeah, but drop the good cop/bad cop routine this time ok?" ----------------------------  
  
The talk with Akito did coincide perfectly with Ruri's story. The agents drilled Akito for over an hour, twice as long as other children, for cracks in the story. They did so with great reluctance, but they knew they couldn't get the girl to slip up.  
  
Despite various tactics, nothing they did resulted in a discrepancy in either story. They had the wrong place. They were about to start another bout of questions with Akito when Kyoko burst into the room.  
  
Walking over and taking him into her arms, "That is enough, he's just a boy!"  
  
"Ma'am you need to let us do are job."  
  
"No, I have to do my job. And that is to protect these children. Look at this boy, he's trembling."  
  
True enough the prolonged exposure to the agents had caused Akito to weaken. He clutched the sides of the nurse like a lifeline.  
  
"But Mrs. Takeshi." Jackson started.  
  
"No buts! Unless you want us to report to your superiors that you've harassing my children, I advise you leave." She then directed her attention towards Akito, calming him with pleasing words and reassurances.  
  
Whispering to his partner, "Elmhurst just said he checked that hack.it was into the Tenkawa file, we have the wrong location."  
  
Jackson bowed to Kyoko, "Then I apologize Ma'am and we will leave."  
  
True to their word, the two agents left the orphanage and returned to Nergal to continue searching in other locations. ----------------------  
  
Ruri hurried out of the computer room after altering the traces of her previous hack, and awaited Akito's return.  
  
She felt terrible. She had used him. The only connection to her past and she used him. She eyed Geki and took him into her arms. She tinkered around with the upgrades she gave him while she waited.  
  
As time grew longer and Akito still hadn't arrived, Ruri's dread grew. 'What if they do something to him to force a testimony?' She felt a cold chill run down her. Could she live with herself if they did something to him, even if she remained free?  
  
Walking past the open door, Maki entered the Tenkawa/Hoshino abode. "You still here? I thought that after my talk to the men they'd throw you in a zoo."  
  
Yellow eyes narrowed as Ruri stared down the larger girl. A small portion of the pain she was feeling being displayed as she set the plushy on the ground. "Geki lock on and fire."  
  
Laughing heartily, "What can that dumb thing do to me.you are a freak."  
  
Her laugh was cut short as Geki spoke, "Target acquired, commencing attack. Let's Geki-ga-in!' the triumphant call was followed by a volley of q-tips being fired from both arms.  
  
Maki was struck in the face by multiple projectiles and fled the room to escape the mighty wrath of the plushy.  
  
Flipping the off switch and taking her seat again, Ruri felt slightly better. Would the small thing she did make up to the one friend she had left.and a friendship that was growing quickly. --------------------  
  
Eventually Akito returned to the room, and as Nergal goons didn't follow him, Ruri guessed the plan had worked.  
  
She asked him how he was, and if they did anything to him. She again smiled at him when he told her that they did not. Showing him a small token of her esteem she handed him the upgraded Gekiganger, calling it Geki V 2.5.  
  
Once the finished talking about the incident Kyoko appeared at the door and told them it was lights out. The now standard procedure occurred as Akito left the room so Ruri could change. When signaled to enter, Akito blushed again, he couldn't help that he found her remarkably cute in the blue PJ's.  
  
He climbed into his bed and she turned off the lights.  
  
Ruri was slightly startled to be addressed by him suddenly, "How are you feeling Ruri?"  
  
Turning to her side, "I am fine Akito-san, thanks to you."  
  
He hung his head over the side of the bed, " I didn't mean about today.you cry in your sleep sometimes."  
  
Her half shut eyes opened fully, had she actually cried in her sleep? She had bad dreams of her past life.her life in the future, but bad enough to cry?  
  
"Have I been?"  
  
Nodding from his position, "It's ok, Kyoko-san said she heard me crying too."  
  
'He cried, Akito-san cried?' Her old feelings of abandonment suddenly didn't hurt as bad, sure she was going to have to adjust and be very cautious but it wasn't that bad now.  
  
Possessed by a strange desire, Akito climbed out of his bed and into hers.  
  
The bewildered girl blushed then propelled the boy out of her bed and onto the floor, "What were you doing?"  
  
Crawling on his hands and knees back to her, "It was something Kyoko-san did for me, when I was having trouble sleeping."  
  
As her blood pressure lowered, "Kyoko-san slept in your bed?" she said with skepticism.  
  
Shaking his head, "No she didn't sleep in the bed, she stayed with me until I fell asleep. It really helped me."  
  
'He's concerned for my well being even after what I asked of him.' She shook her head, "I thank you for the offer but I must decline. I would feel.uncomfortable right now."  
  
He accepted her decision and ascended to his bed again and looked into the ceiling. He noted how Ruri's breathing tapered off and guessed she was asleep. Outside their room, Kyoko leaned against the wall.  
  
"Evening dear," she called to her approaching husband.  
  
Mr. Yuri Takeshi kissed his wife's cheek, "Long night?"  
  
The look on her face expressed the emotional fatigue she was feeling, "Understatement."  
  
Yuri noticed the room number they were standing by, "How is he?"  
  
"He's good. I had to step in on those bastards questioning session though."  
  
Laughing softly at the idea of his gentle wife berating a Nergal officer, he took her arm and began escorting her to their room. He knew Kyoko took extra care of Akito over the other children for reasons beside the official order. "He's going to be fine you know. You don't need to be so worried."  
  
Looking into her husband's eyes, "I know, its just when I look at him.I see Macki."  
  
"He would be about Akito's age. But he isn't Macki." Yuri admitted.  
  
Fighting back the swell of emotion, all Kyoko could do was nod.  
  
The loss of their son was still painful. A mutated form of the flu had hit the colony when their son was ten. No cure for the few unfortunate people that contracted the disease was found and those with it died slowly. Two years after Macki died of the disease, Akito appeared as a blessing for the still mourning Kyoko.  
  
As the entered their shared room, "I just feel so sorry for him, he lost his parents at such a young age and now.now he's so alone."  
  
Pulling his wife into a fierce hug, "He has you doesn't he? You've helped him through much of his pain, and now as much as I hate to admit you were right, he's opening up to the Hoshino girl."  
  
Nodding softly, "He deserves good friends." --------------------  
  
Akito was stirred from his light slumber by the sounds of whimpering. He stole a quick glance at Ruri as she slept and saw a few tears coming out of her eyes. Slowly he attempted to sneak back into her bed, hoping to offer her some small comfort.  
  
As he blushed and neared her, she didn't resist his approach. He lay an arms length away from her and placed his hand on her shoulder. The result was almost instantaneous; Ruri stopped her fidgeting and calmed down. Akito felt a bit nervous about sleeping in her bed for a second time, but he pushed those feelings aside. He wanted to help her as he was helped.  
  
Eventually he fell asleep, neither of them had bad dreams. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------- Author notes  
  
Well, I tried to have this work out as to not alter time line too much, at least the part that doesn't involve the young Tenkawa.  
  
The end may be a bit bold but to children, comfort and kindness take odd forms. Akito is Ruri's knight as even though he is withdrawn I think he'd try to help his new friend.  
  
You may disagree and if you do.take up the key board and write a better story :) Well comments, idea's, requests are always enjoyed  
  
Thanks go to Golden Kitsune for pre-reading again.don't know what I'd do without ya man.  
  
Ja-mata  
  
Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com www.geocities.com/zentrodie.geo) 


	5. Misconceptions

Standard Disclaimer!!  
  
I own nothing of Nadesico; so don't expect me to be able to shell out money for a lawsuit (.  
  
After a long absence I am back. Moving and returning to school was playing havoc with my time. I hope to be able to get back into a steady rhythm of writing but please don't hold your breath.  
  
Again, thanks to my pre-reader's help, story is going to be slown down, were I had planned one chapter we figured a way to spread it into three. So with that said I start!!  
  
--------------------------------  
  
Anata No Ichiban Ni Naritai Chapter 5 - Misconceptions  
  
Peaceful times have a habit of speeding quickly through people's lives. For Ruri and Akito this was also true. Three years passed since the Nergal agents questioned the children about 'the stranger.'  
  
The time passed with many happenings. The pair, while not often, found themselves comforting each other in times of sadness. Several times a sharing of sleeping space had occurred. With the passage of time, the duo aged, and as they aged something happened. It happens to all people, but when it does its never the same afterward, they hit puberty.  
  
Akito was growing into an attractive man, a fact that was now more relevant to Ruri. She had to question if Kami liked to throw women at Akito. Maki Hibiki surprised Akito on her last day at the orphanage by kissing him on the cheek with a tear-streaked expression on her face. She also wondered if her time with Akito had affected that outcome. "She made fun of you for spending time with me.but look at what happened," Akito commented.  
  
Ruri's development was a bit more dramatic than Akito's. She grew about a foot and a half and so had her hair. Ruri decided to keep her hair long and it now was down to her hips in twin pigtails. Her pale skin had developed a bit more color and her hair darkened from its platinum to a pale blue. Her figure, to her unspoken despair, had remained diminutive as she compared herself to the future captain of the Nadesico.  
  
Akito had to watch himself, as he often found himself staring at her. Luckily, from some perception, Ruri didn't notice.  
  
Akito still planned to become a great chef, and cooked more and more often during his off time. Ruri and Kyoko didn't mind, as they got to be his official taste testers. His skill was still marginal but it was growing. Kyoko was so proud of the two of them, Akito her surrogate child and Ruri, the girl that was eating away the shell that encompassed the boy.  
  
The nurse was a little upset with the two however whenever she would find the two sharing a bed. She knew it wasn't sexual, not at the moment she often confessed, but still unnerved her.  
  
The others residents, save Maki, never fully accepted the pair. That fact served to bolster the now steel framed friendship between them. Akito would defend Ruri's name whenever she was ridiculed, and one time blows were exchanged. Ruri didn't have to engage in such actions, as her method of protecting Akito was subtler, but more severe. She had the overly cruel children sent to other orphanages.  
  
And throughout everything, Geki watched. The plush toy, that without Ruri's initial aid would have been lost to time, had been significantly modified. The voice activated, Q-tip firing toy could now walk and jump large distances. "It's only until I can make him fly, " Ruri kept telling Akito.  
  
Thoughts about altering the timeline were slowly being eroded by the continually growing feelings Ruri had regarding Akito. She would often have to chastise herself for a stray thought here, a lingering gaze there. 'Puberty is stupid,' she often thought.  
  
Despite the feelings regarding her becoming a woman, she still was hard pressed to accept her feelings regarding the would-be Aestivalis pilot. She couldn't see herself admitting it to herself let alone him. But in the background, a red haired woman saw the tall tell sings of young love.  
  
"May have to assign them separate rooms after all," Kyoko said while suppressing a giggle.  
  
A single storm cloud was in the sky of the Hoshino/Tenkawa relationship. It appeared only to Ruri and its name was Kyoko Takeshi. Ruri tried to deny the idea that he could have a crush on the nurse.  
  
She reasoned, 'He knows she married, how can he have feelings like that for her!' She then recalled the look Akito would bestow upon her. She was certain it was longing.  
  
---------------------  
  
Akito glumly walked into his shared room and spotted Ruri on her bed. "Not disturbing you am I?"  
  
Putting her book down, "Not at all, is it time for light's out already?"  
  
"No, just couldn't concentrate on the ingredients tonight," he admitted and fell into the chair.  
  
Ruri knew that such an occurrence meant he was lost in thought, looking at him she ventured, "want to talk about it?"  
  
He appeared to be weighing the options of including Ruri into his ordeal. After a few moments of deliberation he reached his answer, 'she's a girl she could help.'  
  
"Kyoko-san's birthday is the day after tomorrow, and I don't know what to get her," he said with a languished sigh.  
  
Unseen by Akito, the mention of the nurse's name caused Ruri's continence to drop slightly. "Do you have any ideas at all?"  
  
"A few but they don't seem good enough for her."  
  
'He wants to impress her, his feelings must be strong.' With a heavy heart, "I could help you pick something out for her."  
  
Even as she said the words she regretted them. 'Why should I help him get a gift for a woman that cannot return his feelings.' Ruri was feeling something strange to her, jealousy.  
  
Bright eyed and smiling, "You'd really help me get her a gift, you're the best Ruri!"  
  
She smiled lightly at his comment; she couldn't help it as Akito's words always affected her. "When do we go?" she asked.  
  
Looking at an old bus schedule he had found, "We can leave about 9 a.m. for the city shopping district."  
  
"Than it is set, we'll leave after breakfast. Now will you allow me to change into my night attire?" she said in a voice that hinted on sorrow.  
  
Her tone wasn't lost on the 15 year old, "Sure.are you ok Ruri?"  
  
Realizing her tone of voice had betrayed her she responded, "I'm fine, just tired."  
  
Nodding to her Akito left the room and leaned against the wall. He was taller now and more muscular, but still had the rather shabby brown hair. His thoughts were jumbled with emotion and clouded by his entering adulthood.  
  
He could sense a great desire to protect Ruri, the young girl that had affected his life so greatly. 'When things looked so bad.she came, and now look.' He smiled brightly. Suddenly the urge to sneak a peak at the young woman entered his mind. While not the first time he had such an urge, he still felt ashamed of such impulses.  
  
To help get his mind off the attractive young woman that was changing in his room at that very moment, Akito started to think about what to get Kyoko.  
  
He came up with a few ideas; he'd wait and ask Ruri about them tomorrow while they shopped. When she had finished changing into her now light green pajamas, she signaled for him to come in. Upon entering, Akito found Ruri already in bed and on her side. He hoped she wasn't keeping some sort of problem from him, but he climbed into his bunk and went to sleep.  
  
Ruri found it hard to sleep, her thoughts on the next days actives playing havoc with her emotions. She fought back a sigh and fell asleep. 'Akito no baka,' was her last thought.  
  
-----------------------------  
  
Morning was hectic. Akito was quick to rise, while Ruri was more withdrawn. By the time she had dressed, she had found Akito had eaten already and presented her with a handmade breakfast. She knew he cooked as much as he could, but only allowed Kyoko and herself to sample it.  
  
She ate her food while Akito asked for permission for the pair to head into the city. Kyoko was a tad apprehensive about letting them go, "That spy still hasn't been found," she used as an excuse.  
  
Ruri had her reservations, but she felt that Kyoko knew the spy from three years ago was really her.  
  
When Akito relinquished the fact that he was going with Ruri however, Kyoko smiled sweetly at him and relented. They put their shoes on and were off.  
  
'Going on dates at 15, those two never cease to amaze me.' Kyoko still loved Akito deeply, for her Akito had become a second son. She was saddened though, as he never really showed any outward feelings towards her. Sure a thank you here and there, the food sampling, but nothing major. She felt slightly hurt by his lack of outward emotion.  
  
"Hope Ruri-chan helps him open up to others, " she said to nobody in particular and resumed her watch.  
  
-----------------------------  
  
As they boarded the bus, "So where will we begin our search?"  
  
Letting Ruri take the window seat, "I have a few idea's as to what to give her.but I'd like to hear what you have to say about them."  
  
Nodding at his notion she waited for him to continue.  
  
Akito had grown to understand Ruri's many non-verbal cues, "I want to give her something really special.but I don't know what she really likes."  
  
She didn't like his tone, "Why not simply give her the credits and allow her to make her own purchase?"  
  
Playing with his thumbs, "That's to impersonal."  
  
'I know,' was her thought but her words spoke differently, "Than what idea's DO you have?"  
  
"Well.jewelry, card, something for her office.something she would like."  
  
The bus came to a halt and the two teenagers stepped off into the growing center of commerce. Being a still growing facility, the Utopia colony didn't have many major centers of trade, but the two were standing in the largest. Although it was still relatively early the sidewalks were bustling with would be customers and dealers hawking their wares.  
  
As she readjusted the hem in her skirt, "How can you even afford to purchase a gift for her?"  
  
"Oh, yeah you don't know. My parents.left me a trust fund after they.died."  
  
The words sunk into her mind, 'that explains things.but why was Akito poor on Earth.' Then it struck her, 'the attack! The money must be in an independent Martian exchange system. After the attack all funds would have been lost!'  
  
Akito watched Ruri as they walked, 'she's deep in thought, wonder what it it's about.'  
  
"Are you sure you wanted to come with me today?" he asked as the started down the street.  
  
Rocked from her thought process, "Oh, yes. Just trying to think of a gift for Kyoko-san."  
  
Being brought back to subject Akito stopped in front of a kiosk, "What do you think about these?"  
  
Looking at the displayed wares, "You are not serious are you?"  
  
Akito picked up a Gekiganger graphic novel, "You don't think she'd like it?"  
  
Striking him lightly on the top of the head, "We aren't shopping for ourselves Akito."  
  
Yes, Akito's favorite anime finally rubbed off on Ruri and she too was a Gekiganger fan. The two would spend their Saturday mornings in control of the television set and watch as much as possible.  
  
Putting the book back down, "I guess your right, you have any ideas?"  
  
She started leading Akito down the street again, "You must think of why you want to give her something not what you want to give her."  
  
Standing still, "What does that mean?" he asked in utter confusion.  
  
With a sigh of frustration, "If you want to give a gift to convey emotion, you must know what emotion you wish the receiver to have."  
  
Ruri noticed recognition in Akito's eyes, 'he understands.' She still didn't like what she was doing; this was only going to hurt Akito. She found out, however, she couldn't help herself from giving her honest opinion.  
  
With his new outlook on the task, the pair visited a great deal of shops and stands. He would get the perfect gift. Noon arrived to soon for him, as he had only begun to take note of actual possibilities.  
  
He set down a decorative tea kettle when Ruri's stomach announced its anger.  
  
Smiling softly at the girl who was selflessly helping him, "Want to stop for lunch, my treat?"  
  
Ruri blushed at her unspoken declaration, "Yes please."  
  
The two looked around the promenade for a place to eat. As a center of commerce it was filled with numerous venders. Ramen, Chinese, Tai, and many unique food suppliers were available to them.  
  
In one voice they both said, "Noodles?" A woman standing by them laughed at the faces the two made when the both asked the same question at the same time.  
  
They walked to the noodle shack and made their orders. When the waitress brought the food she couldn't resist saying, "wish my boyfriend would take me out shopping and to lunch. You got a keeper their missy."  
  
Ruri quickly blushed and admonished the serving girl, "We are simply friends, and I am assisting him as he looks for a birthday gift."  
  
As the waitress apologized to Ruri, Akito tried to mask the embarrassment and recover from the slight disappointment from Ruri's comment. 'Do I want her to be my girlfriend?'  
  
They ate in silence after the girls comment. Both to embarrassed to talk at the moment. The bill came and Akito paid as he said he would, and they started their search over again.  
  
The outcome wasn't looking too promising. Akito and Ruri would often find something nice, but when they thought about it, just didn't seem to be right. As they searched, they talked. Although they were near constant companions, they didn't speak this much together.  
  
Both were the silent type, a fact Ruri was astounded by with her future knowledge. But as they shopped, they spoke openly. The rather fragile person Ruri was underneath her projected exterior of cold astounded Akito. Ruri was equally astonished to learn she had so much in common with Akito. Both had a new and greatly improved respect for the other.  
  
Checking his watch, "This is bad, the bus comes in about an hour and we still haven't picked anything."  
  
"We could revisit the jeweler, that was the best match so far," Ruri opted.  
  
"I guess." he stopped mid-sentence as he passed a glass dealer.  
  
"Akito?"  
  
"I have it! But I think it'll take some time," he exclaimed in triumph.  
  
Following his gaze, "What will take time?"  
  
In a hurried voice, "Ruri, you have to head back to the bus stop and keep it from leaving, please?"  
  
'He wants me to wait alone at the stop for an hour while he gets a married woman a gift?' Her face a mask of emptiness. "Fine, it will be there."  
  
Near bursting Akito put his hands on her shoulders and smiled, "Thanks so much Ruri-chan!"  
  
The mention of chan and the contact resulting in twin blushes from the two, but Ruri was quick to recover, "I will be off."  
  
She removed Akito's hands and headed to the station. When she was out of sight, Akito entered the store and made his purchase.  
  
--------------------------  
  
'He thinks of me as a friend, I should be happy enough with that.' Ruri reminded herself for the umpteenth time as she waited. 'Then why do I feel like this?'  
  
She knew she shouldn't get attached, she couldn't, and she did.  
  
Shaking her head fiercely to banish the slip in her logic, she saw Akito running towards her.  
  
'My Knight returns and with such haste,' she mused.  
  
Breathing heavily, "Guess.it.didn't take.as long.as I thought it would."  
  
"It appears so," she said a bit more curt than she liked.  
  
Again her voice didn't slip past Akito's now trained ears, but his questioning was cut off by the opening of the bus door. Ruri quickly slipped into the bus, her seat, and silence.  
  
-------------------------  
  
The ride back was long and arduous. Ruri not speaking, and Akito wondering why she was upset. They arrived back at the orphanage with only an hour before lights out.  
  
Kyoko insisted they alternate eating and showering with that time. Akito thanked whatever deity was watching over him, as she overlooked the bag he held.  
  
After the required tasks were completed the pair discovered what a full day of shopping can do and were quickly over run by exhaustion. Akito actually fell asleep in his normal cloths.  
  
Ruri however did change. Long after Akito had passed out, the exhausted Ruri lay looking at the underside of his bed. 'I failed.'  
  
-----------------------------  
  
When Ruri woke, she found the room empty.  
  
'Gone so soon to give her the precious gift?' she thought bitterly.  
  
She went about dressing with no real care, 'today will not be a good day.'  
  
She didn't even know what the present Akito finally settled on was, 'my attitude yesterday prevented my asking. Why must my own hormones be against me?'  
  
Standing up, she set her day's mission. 'I'm going to see what he got her."  
  
She stole from the room and made her way towards the nurse's office. The closer she got the harder the next step came. She was dragging herself by the time she reached the slightly ajar door.  
  
Compulsion now drove her actions; she licked her lips and peered in.  
  
Kyoko smiled openly at Akito as he held out a bag filled with tissue paper. "I wanted to get you something."  
  
Taking out paper, "You know you didn't have to do that Akito-kun. But it is a nice gesture."  
  
Kyoko was astonished when Akito had knocked on her door not five-minutes earlier with the bag. She knew the boy had to have some feelings for her, but expected this.  
  
His face plastered with nervousness, "I hope you like it.I wasn't sure."  
  
"I'm sure I will, and it IS the thought that counts right?"  
  
Not really agreeing, Akito nodded nonetheless.  
  
Finally taking out the gift, Kyoko stifled back a gasp. Here on her desk was the most perfect gift Akito could have given her. It was simple, but practical. A colored glass rose on an engraved base. The object itself wasn't what affected Kyoko so much but the inscription.  
  
Kyoko-san, For all the times you stood up for me, I thank you. You've been like a mother to me and I love you. Akito Tenkawa  
  
Without words, the crying nurse embraced the boy tightly. Shocked all Akito could do was hug her back.  
  
'All this time, he loved me just as much as I did him.' She openly cried on the boy, joyous tears.  
  
"I love you too Akito, your like a son to me too," she said as she lightly kissed his cheek.  
  
------------------------  
  
Out in the hall, Ruri heard it all and seen it all.  
  
It all fell into place, 'Akito didn't have a crush.he thought of Takashi- san as a mother.'  
  
Her day instantly better, Ruri shut the door to let the two talk. She headed back to the shared room and dismissed at her earlier notions. 'I had nothing to worry about.' she hung her head, 'except myself.'  
  
With a smile on her face she entered her room and picked up Geki, "It's time for you to fly."  
  
----------------------  
  
Author Notes  
  
Well again, sorry bout the delay. My bad.  
  
I know its waffy but it won't always be. Soon things are going to get troubled.then nasty.then I don't know :)  
  
Always like ideas/comments/suggestions  
  
Hope you liked this chapter and continue to read in the future.  
  
Ja Mata  
  
Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com www.geocities.com/zentrodie.geo) 


	6. Moving on

Standard Disclaimer!  
  
Whow I've been putting this off. Was going to put it off longer but the damn disk I had stored the mst I'm working on died! Oh well I do have back ups. So now back to this story. Hope you didn't mind the time lag.if you did sorry hope this makes up for it.  
  
And about the sugar content of last chapter.you're going to miss it soon as the story is going to drop a notch on the love-love meter.  
  
And without further Apu.I mean.never mind.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
Anata No Ichiban Ni Naritai Chapter Six- Moving on  
  
Several months passed since Akito presented Kyoko with her gift. Said gift greatly altering the pair's relationship. What once was quite appreciation for each other, was now open affection. A mother who lost her child and the child who lost his parents. Ruri watched the pair with envy; never really have a close relationship with her parents.  
  
As for Ruri and Akito, they still remained nearly constant companions. On several occasions Akito would insist Ruri interact with the now younger girls at the orphanage. "It will do you good to act the older sister to them. And they could use it too," he told her. Her response was to force Akito to take the younger males to the natorium bi-weekly. But, despite all the time they shared neither brought up their growing feelings for one another.  
  
Ruri wouldn't allow herself to admit she loved Akito. She was too worried that her actions could destroy the future. Akito's reason wasn't as noble, he was simple too afraid to lose her friendship. So the two withheld their feelings for one another.  
  
--------------  
  
"You know I could try to get the eviction date lengthened Akito," Kyoko said as she watched him pack.  
  
Placing the now aerial Geki into his only duffle bag, "It wouldn't be right. And don't worry I'm sure we'll be fine."  
  
Kyoko stood in the doorway as he packed. She was so proud of him, but she was sad he had to leave. It was standard procedure to have all residents leave upon their sixteenth birthday. They received their education at an accelerated rate so they could attain normal jobs at the colony or attend higher levels of school. She didn't want her would-be son to be homeless.  
  
"How about you stay until you have an apartment picked out?" she pleaded.  
  
Smiling at her, "Ruri is out scouting places now. With the money left in my trust fund we should be able to make a few months payments. Then I'll get a job and we'll be fine."  
  
Walking the few feet over to him, "So she IS moving with you?" Kyoko asked.  
  
Making a final look over what he had packed, and what he'd left out for his last few days living there, "She insisted. Actually, I'm glad she did."  
  
Her motherly instincts taking over, "Now don't do anything foolish now Akito. You two are still young and children at your age."  
  
Blushing deeply, "Kyoko-san! I.she.we're not like that."  
  
'Still denies it. Wonder how long that will last,' the nurse thought as she gave the boy a hug. "You be careful, ok?"  
  
'I don't think she likes me 'that' way anyway,' he though then nodded and returned the hug, "Don't worry."  
  
Releasing him, she said, "It's my job to worry about you. Can't let Ruri- chan be the only one. Speaking of Ruri, I think that's her coming up the walk."  
  
Looking out the room's window, "That's her."  
  
"Well I'll let you go and see what she found," taking another look out the window, "All that hair, honestly."  
  
Walking out of his room with Kyoko, "I kinda like it."  
  
'That's why she has it long Akito,' she mused, just as she separated from Akito, "I'm sure a lot of men would like to court her.if they had the chance."  
  
Stopping dead in his tracks, Akito looks at Kyoko as she left. 'Is that right?' He made his way to Ruri's room to talk to her. The director insisted that she be given her own room after he found the pair sharing sleeping space again. Ruri's defense for her crawling into Akito's bed was that she heard him having a rather bad nightmare. The defense failed and pair's lodgings were split, temporarily so it would seem to Kyoko.  
  
--------------------  
  
When Akito knocked on her door, Ruri opened it with a smile on her face. It wasn't a very large smile, but she had one. Her years growing up with Akito had drastically altered her perceptions on life. While she was still very shy and hid most of her emotions, she had them and practiced them. That fact also led Ruri to many mental debates upon her relationship with said boy.  
  
"Am I to take it that the hunt went well?" he asked he girl.  
  
Ruri started to blush; she wasn't smiling at her knowledge but that Akito had hurried to her so quickly. As the older girls left the orphanage, they were replaced by a swelling of younger ones. Those younger girls were quickly taken in by Akito's growing personality, which angered the blue haired girl.  
  
With a shake of her head, "We have three possibilities. I came back to get you to go check them out."  
  
With a slight bow of his head he found himself saying something he didn't want to, "Are you sure you want to move out with me? You can stay here another four-five months if you want."  
  
She tried to hide the pained expression she had, she was overly cautious around Akito; he could read her like a book sometimes. "Aside from you, I have nobody. The children have Kyoko-san to look after them. I would prefer to leave this place and find employment."  
  
Hoping for her to say her reasons were him, he was a depressed by her reply, 'I guess it would be better to live closer to the workplace.' He looked at her and saw the look of impatience in her eyes. "Want to go look at them now?"  
  
To both their surprise, Ruri linked arms with Akito and said, "Waiting for you to say that."  
  
--------------------------  
  
After explaining to Kyoko why they were leaving again, they boarded the bus that lead into the city. The initial shock of Ruri's forward advance had cooled and Akito found he liked being drug around by her. Ruri couldn't explain why she had done such an act; she only knew that she liked it, and it was easier to lead him than tell him were to go.  
  
They reached the first building a little before lunch. It was a spacious studio apartment. They liked the amount of room that was available but the lack of walls was considered a major problem. 'I'd have to leave the apartment when she changed,' Akito thought, Ruri was thinking along similar lines as they both had a healthy blush.  
  
In unison, "Let's try the next place."  
  
They reached their second potential home after a quick stop for lunch. As they entered a feeling of nostalgia washed over Ruri, it was very similar to her 'school.' With hardwood floors, carpeted living room, bath, kitchen, and deck it was a very nice apartment. The price was even very agreeable to the pair. Even with his remaining trust fund they needed a lot of additions, which they could afford if they moved into this residency. Only one problem existed, it was a single bedroom.  
  
"Lets take a look at the last one, I'm sure if we need to we could work something out here," Akito proposed.  
  
Inclining to agree with him, Ruri lead him to the last apartment with any vacancies.  
  
Akito's jaw hit the floor as they entered. To say the apartment was extravagant would have been an understatement.  
  
"No wonder this place is open. Who could afford this place?" Akito gapped.  
  
Walking across the padded floors of what looked like a traditional Japanese home, Ruri spoke, "With the money we have we could afford to make only the first months rent. We would need jobs almost immediately to keep it."  
  
With a heavy sigh, "That means no food, furniture, or luxuries."  
  
"Which leaves us only two choices; the studio or the single," the girl said with a hint of depression in her voice.  
  
Returning the key to the office, Akito reiterated, "You could stay at the orphanage until something better opens up."  
  
"And leave you to accidentally kill yourself? I think not," said in her normal voice.  
  
Knowing it was a joke, Akito burst into a fit of laughter, "You're getting better at jokes. You know that?"  
  
Ruri offered him a smile, and they headed back into the city proper for supper.  
  
---------------  
  
The meal was spent in silent contemplation. Both were weighing their options. They both factored in their own feelings, but that didn't help them make a decision because they refused to admit it. As the waiter took away their dishes, Akito reached his decision.  
  
"We'll take the single bedroom and I'll sleep in the living room."  
  
'The soundest resolution,' Ruri figured, "I'll tell the relater we'll take it."  
  
The check was received and paid; Akito escorted Ruri back to the orphanage, again in silence. Too many things were bombarding the now older Hoshino. She was going to be living alone with Akito in a single bedroom apartment. 'Sure he's going to sleep on the couch, but this is still a very large step.'  
  
Akito's thoughts were again of a similar nature. 'If I do live with her, can I be trusted not to try and start an actual relationship? What if I try it and she doesn't respond? She'd move out with no place to go to.'  
  
--------------  
  
The following week flew by like a breeze. After contacting the realtor and informing of their desire for the apartment, the two were accosted with paper work. Kyoko surprised the two by giving them a fairly large sum of money to 'help get started.'  
  
When they were finally in the apartment, Ruri came to a decision. 'Timeline be damned, but I have to do this.' Informing Akito, who was still unpacking his cooking supplies, that she had forgot something aback at the orphanage, she left.  
  
Arriving at her old dwelling, Ruri immediately sough Kyoko. She found the nurse in her office.  
  
"Ruri-chan, back so soon? I thought the unpacking would have taken at least a few days," Kyoko said, trying to mask the happy feeling of seeing the girl. 'Gone only one day and I already miss them.'  
  
Ruri's head fell softly, "Kyoko-san, how hard would it be for you to move to earth?"  
  
Shock instilled in her voice, "Move to earth? Why would we want to do that?"  
  
Internal conflict raged inside of her, she didn't know if Kyoko and her husband died during the attack or not. "I can't explain it. I just think it would be best if you moved back to earth."  
  
'Well we were planning on retiring on earth, but not this soon.' Standing up from her chair, "Can you tell me any reason you think moving would help us?"  
  
'You'll DIE if you stay here much longer!' Calm still in her voice, "Not directly, but it would be much better for you if you did."  
  
Kyoko sat speechless. She knew Ruri wouldn't suggest such an idea if she didn't have a good reason for it, but what could it be? "I'll talk to my husband about it Ruri-chan. I can't promise anything, but maybe early retirement is an option."  
  
Wiping the tear that threatened to trace her cheek, she smiled, "Thank you Kyoko-san. Now I must go back and help Akito."  
  
Before Ruri had a chance to shut the door, "Ruri-chan!" Kyoko called stopping the girl in her tracks. "If I do this, you have to do something for me."  
  
Peeking her head back into the office, "Anything Kyoko-san."  
  
Smiling broadly, "I know you didn't move in with Akito just to find a job. Tell him how you feel."  
  
'Of all the things to ask, she asks the one thing I CAN'T do,' grudgingly, "I'll try."  
  
After she muttered out her response, she drew the door closed slowly. She honestly didn't know if she could confess her feelings to him. She just finished breaking the timeline for Akito's benefit, could she do it for her own? Her mind was still pondering the answer to her dilemma as she approached her apartment.  
  
---------------  
  
Ruri was shocked as she opened the door to her apartment. Not only had all the boxes been unpacked, but also the floor had been cleaned. 'How did he do all this in such a short time?'  
  
Walking out from the bedroom, "Welcome back. Did you find what you forgot?"  
  
Unsure if she did accomplish her goal, "I couldn't find it. It may have been in the boxes after all."  
  
Akito simply nodded, they did have more stuff then they at first believed. "Ready to go out furniture shopping?"  
  
Sitting on the floor in the kitchen, "Can I get something to eat first?"  
  
Blushing at his own impatience, Akito cooked a small meal for her and himself. Eating out of plastic containers, both realized they needed a lot more things to live comfortably. As they ate, Akito asked how things were like back at their old home. Ruri told him that several girls had asked how 'he' was and that besides that nothing had really changed.  
  
"It was only a day and a half ago," she informed him.  
  
"It's only been that long? Feels longer, and you just got here today,' Akito murmured.  
  
Putting the empty plastic storage containers in the sink, the pair left for their shopping adventure.  
  
--------------  
  
After they left the forth store, Akito stopped Ruri.  
  
"Do you think it's a good idea to spend so much of our money?" he asked.  
  
'In about two years it won't matter how much you spent,' she thought but voiced only, "We'll both have jobs soon, so it won't matter."  
  
'Can't fight her logic,' he reasoned as they started walking again, 'but why did she look sad after I asked that?'  
  
Ruri was never more glad for paid movers as she was that day. They had visited three more stores that day, and made many major purchases. Akito gladly paid for the stores to send the heavier items to the apartment for them, he did not want to drag a couch or a bed around all day.  
  
When they gathered all the material items they thought they needed, they went grocery shopping. Ruri had to excuse herself as she pictured them as a married couple; she didn't want Akito to see how red her face was. 'I need to stop this. I could ruin everything.'  
  
Food in hand, they headed home. They arrived twenty minutes before the first truck arrived with their purchases.  
  
The rest of the evening was a nightmare. Boxes were stacked everywhere again. Heavy items being moved around again and again. When all the work was done, both Akito and Ruri were physically exhausted.  
  
They both fell onto the bed they just assembled and made.* Akito looked over at Ruri who had already fallen asleep and brushed the hair off her face.  
  
"Our first real night together," he fought back the implications of his statement. He also resisted the urge to kiss the girl who at that moment looked more beautiful than any woman he had ever seen. Instead, he collapsed next to her and fell asleep.  
  
--------------  
  
The pair soon fell into a stable routine of living. Akito would cook, and Ruri would clean. He would do the grocery shopping, and she would do the laundry. All the tasks were equally distributed between them.  
  
As the weeks passed, they started the search for employment. Akito instinctively restaurants, but found he required either a degree from a cooking school or years of experience. Ruri startled Akito when she told him she had found a suitable job.  
  
Eyes wide and jaw on the floor, "You're going to work for NERGAL!"  
  
"I am highly skilled in technical areas, and they need them. Plus it is a high paying job. I would not like you to pay for everything," Ruri replied.  
  
In truth, she was expecting a far worse response. She knew Akito had some misgivings about Nergal, but she had to work there. Her current existence would still cause major alarm. By working for Nergal, she could easily cover her own existence from their radar.  
  
Understanding slowly showing on his face. "Are you sure you want to?"  
  
As she looked into his eyes she wondered, 'He cares for me so much.would it be so bad to take the next step?' To him she said, "It will not be a problem. We need the money anyway."  
  
Putting his hands up in defeat, he smiled. "How about we go out for dinner to celebrate?"  
  
Nodding and matching his smile with her own, "I'll go change."  
  
-----------------  
  
With Ruri working weekdays at Nergal, Akito intensified his attempts at finding work. Finally he found himself walking down the city street at noon in a mild depression.  
  
'She's working to support us. I'm just holding her back aren't I? Maybe I should give up on my dream of becoming a chef for now.' Unconsciously he ran his hands over each other, and then stopped.  
  
"My IFS, I can get a job in construction or something."  
  
His mindset on acquiring a job, he set out for the labor industry. After several attempts Akito did find a place that would hire him as a driver. 'Finally I can start helping her. All these years she's been their for me, now I can start being their for her.'  
  
Checking his watch, he saw that Ruri should be getting home soon. Stopping for some take-out, he headed home.  
  
---------------  
  
As he walked into the apartment, Akito realized something was amiss. Ruri usually was watching the news when he got home late. Today he saw something he never thought he would.  
  
"Empty cookie boxes? Is that my ice cream?" he whispered to himself.  
  
Before him was a sight he never thought he'd see. It appeared to him that Ruri had gotten off work early and spent her time eating junk food. He couldn't help but smile thinking about how odd it would be to see her eating that whole box of cookies.  
  
But despite his smile he thought, 'what could have caused such an odd behavior?'  
  
He was about to call out to her when he heard a soft voice on the veranda. It was quiet and hushed but filled with sadness. He took a peek around the corner and saw Ruri standing outside, and she was signing. Straining to hear more but remain unseen he could finally make out the words.  
  
{ienai kimochi o daita mama  
  
kono mune ni anata michitekuru  
  
dakedo setsunakute kurushii omoi naki dashisou  
  
kanojo o mitsumeru sono hitomi towa yuru ga nai ki ga suru no demo ne, sukoshi dake . . . honno sukoshi dake kono watashi mite yo  
  
moshi dare yori mo hayaku anata ni deatte itanara omou mama ni negau mama ni koi o shita deshou ka  
  
mouichido moichido umare kawatte aeta nara koto wa anata no ichiban ni Naritai  
  
aeba au hodo ni tsunoru bakari awanakya sabishi kunaru bakari nante migatte na soshite konan na koi o shita no deshou  
  
isso ubaeru mo no nara sou kangaeta koto mo aru futari no kyori mou kore ijou hanashitaku nai kara . . .  
  
okubyou mono da to mou hitori no watashi ga iu soredemo itsudemo anata ga ichiban yo  
  
moshi dare yori mo hayaku anata ni deatte itanara omou mama ni negau mama ni koi o shita deshou ka  
  
mouichido moichido umare kawatte aeta nara koto wa anata no ichiban ni Naritai }  
  
As she sounded the final verse she started to cry softly. 'You were right Omaikane, but now that I am with him.I can't do anything. I'm too afraid to tell him. And I soon.soon the Jovian's will attack and I can't go with him. I'll lose him.'  
  
Ruri's unknown listener made a decision. 'She'd be mortified if she knew I saw her cry let alone sing. Why is she so sad?'  
  
So Akito walked back to the door and slammed it then called out loudly.  
  
"I'm home! And I brought supper!"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------  
  
* made as in covers/sheets correctly placed  
  
Well that's the end of that chapter. Next chapter the Attack!!!  
  
Sorry it took so long to get this chapter out but with school projects and my job search.which is over thank Kami. And sorry to those of you reading this on Fanfiction.net the don't allow italics or for some reason the breaks I put in during the song so it's a bit hard to read. Not my fault!!!  
  
Hope you liked it and can spare time to give me some reviews or emails.I always love those  
  
And if you'd like to know Ruri's song was "Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai"  
  
Ge wonder why she sang it :)  
  
If you'd like to know the English version.  
  
As I am holding on to feelings that I can't speak of, my heart is filled with (visions) of you. But it looks like these unbearably painful thoughts will make me cry.  
  
Those eyes of yours are fixed on her, Forever unwavering it seems. But hey, just a little...only a little, could you look at me?  
  
If I had met you before anyone else You would have loved me as in my **dreams...as I wish, right?  
  
(If) once more...(if) once more we were to be *born and meet again, next time, I want to be your number one.  
  
The more often we meet, the worse I feel. Seeing you is bound to just make me lonely. Isn't it selfish, this troublesome love that I feel?  
  
If I could only steal you... Yes, I have thoughts like those too. The distance between us...This is over...I don't wish to speak anymore.  
  
"You coward", another of myself will say. Nevertheless, as always, I think you are the best.  
  
If I had met you before anyone else You would have loved me as in my **dreams...as I wish, right?  
  
(If) once more...(if) once more we were to be *born and meet again, next time, I want to be your number one.  
  
www.animelyrics.com  
  
I think that song symbolizes Ruri's condition quite nicely.  
  
Ja Mata  
  
Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com) 


	7. Letting Go

Standard Disclaimer!  
  
Yes I'm back with the next chapter, and it didn't even take me three months this time! But don't get used to this. Having a heavy class load, work, and extra programming to do, I don't have much time to write.  
  
I'll try to keep things at a good pace but don't expect me to get more than one chapter of one of my stories out ever two weeks. At least for now.  
  
So are you ready for some excitement?  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------  
  
Anata No Ichiban Ni Naritai Chapter 7 - Letting Go  
  
Ruri's hands danced upon her consol. Her mind was accosted by a multitude of thoughts. The most predominant was that in under a month the Jovian attack on Mars would occur. She still had no idea as to what her actions had done to affect the time line. Had her living with Akito altered time so much as to prevent the event that spared him from the attack from occurring?  
  
She sighed heavily and reclined in her chair. Her position in Nergal was now a few rungs higher up the ladder, but she was still a grunt technician. Far below her old position on the Nadesico, but it offered her invaluable access to the Nergal Mainframe. To which she successfully hid her dual existence.  
  
'I love him,' Ruri thought. Over the years spent with him, she could finally admit it, to herself. 'I love him and I'll lose him soon. Never having told him. But.But should I? Can I?'  
  
A tear threatened to break from her eye as she pictured not only her upcoming death, but also possibly his due to her presence. The tear did fall when she knew that despite knowing the Jovian's were going to attack, she couldn't inform the populace. So many would die, so many would lose their hopes and dreams, but she could do nothing to stop that.  
  
She was so immersed in her thoughts that she failed to notice the blond haired woman watching her type with such skill. To say she was impressed would be an understatement. 'She can be of great help to the project,' she thought as she approached the young woman.  
  
"Excuse me," she said as she tried to gain Ruri's attention.  
  
Turning to face her superior, hoping she wasn't going to be scolded for slacking off in her duties, Ruri's eyes went wide as she saw the woman standing behind her.  
  
"Inez-san!"  
  
-------------------  
  
Akito was worried. Over the last few months Ruri and he had become even closer, if possible. They could have easily been confused for as a couple, but if asked both would have denied it, and it frightened him.  
  
Even though both worked a great deal, they always found time to do something together. Either on the weekend when both had downtime, or if work was lite after they ate dinner.  
  
They would attend movies, restaurants, or simply walk around the colony's growing forest lines. On several occasions both of them were sorely tempted to push the envelope so to speak and take a gambit.  
  
'I still can't believe I almost kissed her,' Akito mused as he started to prepare supper. The incident in his mind replayed itself.  
  
He thought back to the previous week when they had been to the shopping district. Something about how Ruri was looking at him caused him to lean closer to her. If it weren't for a child running into his leg he would have. He shook off the thought, he couldn't risk it.  
  
"But this is tearing me apart. I think it's worth the chance of telling her.oh crap." He looked down and saw his fried rice had burnt, meaning another trip to town for more.  
  
------------------  
  
"So you want me to help you?" Ruri asked skeptically.  
  
Reclining in the chain in her office, Inez was intrigued. This girl had know of her, not only known of her but her name as well. Inez was under the impression that Nergal had hid her identity once she arrived on Mars and started working for them. 'How much does she know?'  
  
In her usual manner, "Exactly, with your skills you'd be an indispensable help to me."  
  
In her mind Ruri was having a crisis. If she took Inez up on her offer, and stayed with her. She could live. Inez lived through the attack, and if Ruri was with her she could as well. All she had to do was accept her offer, but she didn't know much about the offer. 'What about Akito?'  
  
"What can you tell me about your work?" the smaller woman asked.  
  
Calling up several virtual displays, Inez spoke, "I cannot tell you to much as it is confidential. What I can say is that you'd be highly paid, and the work would be probably something you'd like very much."  
  
"Would I need to relocate? Would I be working directly with you?" She asked mainly to discern where the safe zone for the attack would be.  
  
Smiling slightly at her new found advantage, "Actually you'd be my subordinate. And the location is a Nergal facility about two hundred miles north of the Utopia Colony."  
  
'Her subordinate,' Ruri replied her previous thoughts about survival. 'It would work.' Again she fumbled with her hands and tried to act as if she was under Inez's influence. "Would I have to relocate? I have.someone living in the colony."  
  
To that Inez looked confused, "According to your personnel file your are not married."  
  
Ruri instantly blushed, quite uncontrollably, "Not married.we are simply childhood friends. I don't believe he could afford the rent if I were to suddenly leave."  
  
Nodding in understanding, "You would be required to live on base during the week, but if you wished you could return to your 'friend' on the weekends."  
  
Her base survival instincts warring with her logical mind fought for her life. Survival claiming Inez was offering salvation; logic asked her about the fate of countless others if her actions altered time.  
  
She made her decision.  
  
--------------------------  
  
Walking out of the grocery store, Akito was pondering recent events again. Even though things were great between the two of them, something felt off to him. 'It all started that day I heard her singing.'  
  
Akito never told Ruri, or even hinted, that he had overheard her that day. Even now he would take a look at her while she didn't think he was looking and see an intense sadness in her features. For a while he thought it was because she may have felt trapped with him. That she wanted to leave and seek other options in life.  
  
His thoughts propelled him so far as to ask her how she felt about living with him. Her response quelled any notion that her depression was based from him.  
  
"Maybe a gift will brighten her mood," he said to himself with a smile. 'Sure money is a little tough but if it helps her, why not?'  
  
So as he walked back to the transport home he window-shopped. He stopped outside an electronics store and got an idea. Ever since Gekiganger had stopped playing on television, the two of them had often found themselves bored on Saturday mornings. Remembering her unspoken enjoyment of games, he purchased a consol unit.*  
  
-------------------  
  
Akito returned home with ample time to cook supper over again, much to his joy.  
  
'I may not be able to pursue my dream now, but I can still try,' he thought as he added a few spices to the simmering pot. He set the timer and retired to the living room and found a place in front of the television.  
  
"Why did they have to cancel it," Akito moaned for the loss of his favorite show.  
  
Startling him Ruri announced her presence, "Still upset about losing Gekiganger?"  
  
Yelping in surprise Akito turned to see his roommate, "Ruri, when did you get here?"  
  
Smiling at his typical reaction to surprise, "Just a few moments ago."  
  
Before she had the chance to say anything else, "And what do you mean am 'I' still upset? Look at Geki," He stressed his point by pointing the Geki plush on top of the television.  
  
Ruri blushed at his accusation; she had made many upgrades to Geki after they were no longer able to view the show. "I just." she then saw the smile on his face and realized it was a joke. "I'll get you for that Akito Tenkawa."  
  
Simply nodded to her and heading for the kitchen, "Sure you will Ruri- chan." Akito froze after slipping in his speech, as did Ruri, both thought, 'did I hear -chan?"  
  
Both brushed off the comment, and prayed the other would as well, headed to the kitchen/dining room.  
  
They took their customary position in the cramped room and Akio served the food. As they began to eat, Akito asked Ruri a question that she was hoping to have more time to formulate a response for.  
  
"You're a little late coming home today, something happen?"  
  
She thought on the fly and took the path of least resistance, "I got a promotion today."  
  
Beaming a smile at her, "That's great Ruri! When does it take affect? Oh wait! I got something for you, I guess you can call it a gift for getting promoted."  
  
He hurried out of the room, leaving Ruri to wonder if she had done the right thing. 'We have two days then I'll be gone a lot. If I can just hold out for the attack and not tell him. He'd never have to know.' As soon as she thought about Akito never knowing her feelings she felt the urge to cry again.  
  
She composed herself just as Akito walked back around the corner and handed her the box. Looking at the game system in the bag, she smiled widely at Akito. "How did you know?"  
  
Taking his seat again, "It wasn't that hard, I saw you eyeing those commercials intently. You always did have a thing for computers too. So tell me about this promotion?"  
  
-------------------  
  
The 'promotion' as Ruri put it didn't make Akito to happy, but he encouraged her non-the-less. The time apart was hard on both of them, but they managed. The weekends, which they both waited for with rapt anticipation, were spent doing random events.  
  
They would play Ruri's game system, Akito being sorely outmatched, take Geki out for a fly, or if Ruri was overly tired, watch something.  
  
But unfortunately time marched on to its apex. Ruri felt it coming, and through her actions and feelings, so did Akito to an extent.  
  
So it wasn't a great surprise that they both saw Sunday nights as something to dread.  
  
-------------------  
  
Ruri looked at the calendar, 'September 28, 2195. Three days until the attack.'  
  
She made her way towards the door, and to leave Akito's life, possibly forever. "I'm heading to the station Akito.I.I'll see you next.week." The words were not easy for her to say, nor was the smile she forced herself to have.  
  
She had hoped he wouldn't have been there at the moment, but he was. He could feel something was wrong with her. "Ruri, can I ask you a favor?"  
  
'Please Akito.I can't.' her heart was torn; she looked at him approach with his hands behind his back. She desperately wanted to throw her arms around him, kiss him, and tell him everything. 'I have become so weak since coming here.and selfish.'  
  
Akito presented her with the Gekiganger plush toy that they both cherished now, "Take him with you."  
  
Astonished, "But why? Why don't you keep him?" Her mind begging him to keep something of that could remind him of her once she was gone.  
  
He couldn't fully explain why he wanted her to take it, he just did. "Please Ruri, it'd mean a lot to me. I worry that you're lonely. You seem so depressed lately. I just want you to take him." He put the toy in her hand.  
  
"As you wish," she said softly. She took another look into his eyes and saw the concern within them. 'This is goodbye, we may never meet again.'  
  
She felt her body move as if in a dream, her lips resting softly on his for but a brief moment. A moment she knew she would cherish, but with all things it ended. She saw the astonished look on his face, "We'll talk about it next time."  
  
With that she shut the door and ran to the station, praying to whatever God was listening that he wouldn't follow, and secretly that she'd survive and meet him again.  
  
--------------------  
  
Akito spent the next three days in a subtle confusion. 'She kissed me. Does that mean.does that mean she likes me too?' He mused about what it would mean if she did. He smiled.  
  
His revelry was brought to a close as the door chimed. Answering it he found a man in a brown suit with a large box in his hands.  
  
"Package for a Mr. Tenkawa. Sign here please," the man said as he held out a clipboard.  
  
Signing his name and taking the large box, he thanked the man and retired to the kitchen where he could gain a knife to open said box.  
  
Reading the 'from' address Akito was shocked to see that it was from Kyoko, and it was sent from Earth. Once he had it opened he saw a cooler and two letters. One addressed to him, the other Ruri.  
  
He opened and read his note first.  
  
Dear Akito,  
  
We decided to take Ruri-chan's advice and retire to Earth. Hope things are going well for you two, and I hope to be invited to the wedding ^_^. Seriously, the Earth is a wonderful place. So Green and full of life. Hope you like the oranges, they should have survived the trip well, but don't wait to long to eat them or they'll go bad.  
  
Yours truly,  
  
Kyoko Takeshi  
  
He folded the letter and opened the box. Sure enough it contained oranges, and they seemed healthy. He looked at Ruri's letter, 'wonder what hers is about.' He reached for an orange when a siren bleared.  
  
-----------------------  
  
Before he knew what was happening, Akito found himself walking into an underground shelter with the box of oranges and the two letters in his hands. After he heard the siren, he turned on the television and saw the report about some sort of attack.  
  
He hurried to the location the report told him to go. His mind was at ease knowing that wherever Ruri was, it had higher security than he had. At least he tried to be at ease knowing that.  
  
As he walked further into the complex, he saw a multitude of people in varying degrees of shock and fear. Not knowing what to do, he simply walked further into the complex.  
  
He was about to sit when a soft cry entered his ears. He saw the source to be a small girl not twenty meters away. He looked at the box in his hands and walked over.  
  
"Hi there, like an orange?" he offered an orange with an outstretched hand.  
  
The child looked at it and then Akito and smiled. Her fears momentarily forgotten as she grasped for the fruit.  
  
"You're a nice man! My names Ai!" she introduced herself.  
  
After a few moments talking to Ai's mother, Akito returned his attention to the young child all but demanding his full focus.  
  
"Are you married?"  
  
Blushing softly and thinking about Kyoko's note, he shook his head. Trying to calm the child more he said, "No."  
  
Taking his hand, "You can marry me."  
  
Smiling again at the girl, "If you still want to when you're older, sure."  
  
The girl's response was cut short as Akito dived over both her and her mother to protect them from an explosion erupted from behind them. A mechanical beast had broken its way into the building.  
  
People began to panic and flee from the assailant. Akito took a look at Ai as she and her mother as he stood up and vowed, 'I'll save them.' So as people were fleeing the scene, Akito jumped into a power cart near by and drove towards the machine. He collided with the beast and pressed it firmly against the wall. It tried to push him away, but Akito increased his acceleration. Several moments passed and the thing's eye seemed to burst and it went silent.  
  
Several people spotted his actions and cheered him on as they worked on opening the door. Ai saw him and exclaimed how great he was and that she'd defiantly marry him when she was older.  
  
Another cheer erupted from the crowd as the doors were opened and the people made ready to escape. But escape was not to happen. On the other side of the door a small army of the bug like machines were waiting.  
  
Akito saw the initial attack by the new aggressors and felt panic sear through him. His panic was intensified as the dead machine in front of him turned out to not be dead at all. It started its attack upon him again, only this time it was winning.  
  
Akito looked about the room, seeing yellow machines slaughtering people, seeing death all around him, then he saw Ai had ran over to him as her mother had been pinned under debris.  
  
Akito's mind flashed, he saw the earth, saw Ruri, saw Ai, and lastly his old childhood friend and then nothing.  
  
--------------------  
  
He opened his eyes and saw the moon in the sky, but it wasn't one of the Martian moons. He felt grass under his skin. His pendant had lost it's stone.  
  
His mind cleared, and he realized he was on Earth. Only he was on Earth. His eyes shot wide open and he screamed into the night air at the top of his lungs.  
  
"RURI!"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -  
  
*I claim she likes games as in the anime she does play a lot of them, maybe just out of boredom, but either way it works.  
  
This chapter was fast, and covered a lot of ground, but then again, so did Nadesico. I think I kept the characters IC and I did my best to convey emotions. Hope I did a good enough job.  
  
Well hope to hear from you in form of reviews.  
  
Ja Mata  
  
Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com) 


	8. New Beginning

Standard Disclaimer!  
  
Well I'm sure most of you are mad at me for taking so long to get this chapter out. I thank you for your patience. Time for writing is coming in smaller and smaller spasms. And this isn't my only story. So I have to divide my time, somewhat equally, among them all.  
  
Hope you like this chapter and continue to support Anata.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---  
  
Anata No Ichiban Ni Naritai Chapter 8- New Beginnings  
  
One year has past since the disastrous first battle at Mars. For Akito the time had both flown by, yet to seemed to drag on with exceptional slowness. His awakening on Earth was meet with both joy and sorrow in his heart. He was glad to be alive, but pained to think that even though he had survived the girl he was growing to love hadn't.  
  
The reports of possible shelters were close to nil. Even though Nergal claimed otherwise, the people knew that the attack was so sudden that the special shelters Nergal had made were almost impossible to reach in time.  
  
The first few days after his arrival on Earth, Akito spent wandering. He wandered with no purpose or destination. Wallowing in self-pity, he found himself on his only contact on earth's doorstep. Kyoko Takeshi.  
  
The Takeshi's were adamant that Akito stay with them until he was back on his feet. To his surprise Akito found that Kyoko was pregnant. She said it was a special blessing the earth had given her, and she was glad that she wouldn't be that old a mother.  
  
They questioned how Akito made it off Mars, to which he had no answer. They questioned about Ruri, and Kyoko shed her tears for the young girls departure. She had so hoped that Akito and Ruri would wed, but now that hope was gone. Through the shared lose, Akito and Kyoko accepted it.  
  
After a three-month stay at the Takeshi home, Akito had come to terms with his loss and was ready to try to find his own place. Kyoko was skeptical. She knew Akito, and she knew it was his style to hide his pain from others. She just hoped that he wasn't too desperate. 'I have to have faith in him.'  
  
Still with a heavy heart, Akito went to Tokyo in hopes of becoming a cook's apprentice. He had many difficulties finding his lot in that city. He was not able to find his desired job and was forced to again work construction, and other various odd jobs.  
  
He made a meager living and stayed in a single bedroom apartment. His prized possessions being the bike he rode to work, a wok, and the letter that Kyoko had written for Ruri. He'd often look at the unopened letter and think of why he kept it, and why he hid its existence from its author.  
  
In short Akito's life had again taken a down turn. But life works in cycles, and his was about to shift towards the positive. After living in Tokyo for about eight months he was hired at a small Chinese restaurant.  
  
It wasn't the largest place, or even the best, but it was a job that gave him something to throw himself into. Akito would later look back at his boss and think, 'He wasn't the nicest guy, or even that great a chef, but he was what I needed.'  
  
Things were again looking somewhat balanced for the youthful Tenkawa, that is until.  
  
-------------  
  
"Ah man the Jovian's are attacking again?" a customer said to another.  
  
Exhaling heavily, "Were just killing pilots. We can't stand up to those things. Why do they even bother to try?" the other replied.  
  
The pair continued watching the aerial battle, noting the fire blossoms and thinking of the life lost. They were about to leave when another man hollowed out. "Check this out! The fry cook's gone psycho!"  
  
Hearing the explosions, seeing the mecha known as the Jovian Grasshopper, shot Akito full of old memories. Memories he didn't want. Memories he wished to bury and forget. Memories and hopes of a happy life on Mars with Ruri beside him.  
  
Tears steamed down his face and fell into his wok, "DANMIT! WHY DID THAT HAVE TO HAPPEN?"  
  
Several inquisitive patrons walked to the head chef and asked, "What's the deal with your cook? He like the Jovian's?"  
  
'That's the third time this month,' the master chef, this time, had enough of Akito's hysterics. "He's afraid. He can't even look at a picture of a grasshopper without going ridged." Solemnly the man knew he couldn't have his patrons being bothered by Akito's fears. He didn't want to fire him, 'Boy's got promise, but a job's a job.'  
  
Walking over to Akito, who now was trying to scrape burnt rice off his wok, "Akito we need to talk."  
  
---------------  
  
Walking his bike up a hill, wok strapped to his back, Akito wondered what to do next. 'I was fired.'  
  
Cars passed him by as he continued pushing his bike up the steady incline, cursing gravity he wondered about what his boss had told him.  
  
'You have to face your fears.'  
  
Coming to a sudden stop he had a revelation, "Maybe I don't want to face my fears. I tried to on Mars and look at what it got me." But even as he said it, he didn't believe it. 'Ruri would be so upset to hear me speak like this. I can't give up. Something will turn up. Hopefully.'  
  
Finally taking his eyes off the pavement, Akito caught a sudden glimpse of an open suitcase headed right towards him. He mumbled, "Why me God?" right before it hit him, its contents being thrown about the ground randomly.  
  
Picking himself off the ground, and from under the open case, Akito was assaulted by the appearance of a woman. A woman with long blue hair and matching eyes.  
  
"I'm so sorry! You're not hurt are you?"  
  
Akito couldn't help but notice the voice actually did have some sincerity in it. He dusted himself off and gave the woman another look, 'Wow! She's.she's.beautiful.' Finding the girls eyes still on him, "I'm fine. You need any help?"  
  
A wide smile spread across her features, "You'd really help me repack?"  
  
After moving from apartment to apartment over that last few months, Akito was now an expert on packing, "Yeah, I can help. You obviously need it." It was about this time Akito noticed that the woman's companions were growing agitated at her delaying her task.  
  
"Tell me how you'd pack it then?" she asked un-phased at the young man telling her to hurry up.  
  
Showing her a few minor ways to improve her packing and how to protect her fragile possessions, Akito found his hand holding a small silk object. The woman's panties. Now living with Ruri for such a long time, Akito was no stranger to women's undergarments. He did his fair share of the laundry. But these were a complete strangers. Panicking he slammed the case closed. "All done."  
  
Handing her the suitcase handle, he noticed the woman was giving him an odd stare, "Do I.know you?"  
  
'How can I know this woman, I've never seen her before and I've only been on earth for a year, less that in this city,' he mused as he tried to resist laughing at the girl. Knowing he had to say something or she'd remain looking at him, "No, I don't think so."  
  
With a small nod the woman sighed, she apologized again and returned to her car, which promptly sped off. Leaving Akito standing on the street watching. 'Something did feel familiar though.'  
  
Taking a step towards his bike his foot meet with resistance. His eyes peered at the offending limb to find it had come in contact with something that wasn't his. A picture.  
  
His eyes widened as he realized what exactly it was a picture of. "That girl.she's the Misumaru daughter.Yurika!" Old pains resurfaced in a flash. His parents. Ruri had never been able to find their killers; she was only able to find a small connection to Yurika's family. 'Is it possible that they had something to do with it!'  
  
He hadn't even realized it yet, but he was on his bike chasing the car down.  
  
-------------  
  
Jun was nervous; Yurika was acting strangely since the incident with the pedestrian. "Yurika, he wasn't hurt, don't worry about it."  
  
'Jun,' Yurika thought, 'he worries so much about me. But I don't love him. I know he wants me too.but I can't. I feel bad treating him like this, but to tell him the truth would crush him.' Smiling to her friend, "It's not that Jun, I feel like I knew him. I wish we weren't so pressed for time."  
  
The Admiral just drove, 'My well-endowed daughter is so caring.'  
  
Opening the door for Yurika once the got to the Nergal base, "You don't think us being late will be a problem do you?"  
  
"Not at all, I just need to make a good impression and all will be forgiven," Yurika answered in her chipper voice. Jun wasn't to convinced, but with no alternative left, he followed her.  
  
In his heart, something ran cold, 'I'm just glad we won't see that guy again. Something about him just worried me.'  
  
At that very moment on the other side of the base, Akito had just been apprehended for trying to sneak into the base.  
  
-------------  
  
Now Akito didn't know where Yurika was going, and was more than surprised when she entered a military base. But he thought that if he tried being discrete he could have gotten in. He made it five feet into the base before the guards were on him.  
  
To make matters worse, the man that talked to him, this Prospector, convinced him to serve as a cook aboard a space ship. Life had an odd way of changing his way of living on him, usually in a moments notice.  
  
Something about how Prospector talked to him struck a cord, it was sympathetic. He was always receiving sympathy lately. His demeanor was outgoing, if not a little hyper, but some people could just tell he hide a deeper depression underneath.  
  
What Akito didn't know was, the DNA database that had identified him, also told Prospector something interesting. Akito was on Mars up to the exact second that the attack occurred. 'If we can find out how he got to Earth, we could make a lot of mony.'  
  
He let his mind wonder as his body did the same around the ship, this Nadesico. 'So I'm cook again. I'm going to go into space. I wonder where were going.'  
  
So as Yurika was making her rather unexpected 'first impression' on the crew, Akito found himself in the Aestivalis hanger.  
  
'This is actually very impressive! Look at that! Somebody's actually piloting one of them.' He mused as he watched a rather loud man pilot a pink robot. He was about to applaud when the robot gracefully landed on its back. He watched as a medical crew rushed to the cockpit and pulled out the pilot.  
  
'He looks about my age,' Akito thought before the man screamed out in pain. He over heard the fact that the man had broken his leg in two places. 'Maybe I SHOULD be a pilot. I mean if he's protecting us, will we be safe?'  
  
"Hey you!"  
  
Looking around, Akito pointed at himself, the man called out again, "Who else is up there? I left something very important in the cockpit, could you get it for me?"  
  
'What else do I have to do.' Akito thought as he rode a platform down to the lower level and towards the downed Aesti. Finding only a metal Gekiganger figure, Akito smiled. 'If I didn't give Ruri our Geki, I guess mine would be very important too.but maybe he's just immature.'  
  
A sudden rumble sent him falling head first into the pilot seat. Something had happened.  
  
------------  
  
Minato staring at her helm command was a nervous wreck; they were sensing increasing enemy units. "Captain they must know where we are, what do we do?"  
  
The other crewmembers looked at their new captain, waiting for orders. And criticizing the orders the Admiral on deck offered. Most thought the man a weasel, now they thought him cold blooded or a coward. However the captain didn't seem to be humoring him.  
  
Yurika, over the voices of the other command staff, gave the orders. Launch into open ocean, turn and fire at the enemy flank. All they needed was a decoy.  
  
Shouting at his loudest, Guy announced his arrival, "I can do that! All right! Leave it to me captain! I'll destroy them all with my space-ganger!"  
  
The attendant merely stated, "With a double compound fracture?"  
  
Again the bridge collapsed into chaos. Everybody trying to get the captain to act. Softly, a voice in the center of it all spoke, Ruri stated, "We already have a decoy," as she opened a vid-screen to the Aestivalis cockpit.  
  
Guy erupted in rage, "What are you doing in my Gekiganger?"  
  
Goat simply asked Prospector, "Who is that?"  
  
Adjusting his glasses, "Akito Tenkawa from mars. He's a cook on the Nadesico."  
  
"WHAT'S A MARTIAN COOK DOING." Guy was saying before Yurika cut him off.  
  
After seeing thinking about the man, seeing him again, and finally over hearing Prospector, Yurika knew whom the man was. 'Dearest!'  
  
"It's AKITO!"  
  
Over the now open window, Akito was greeted by Yurika's triumphant cheer. The conversation went into multiple directions from there. Yurika questioning why Akito had faked not knowing her, Guy complaining about him stealing the spot light, and Military personnel telling him about how to operate the Aesti.  
  
Akito was overwhelmed by it all. He was now a decoy? Who were these people to tell him what to do? He was a cook not a pilot!  
  
But as Yurika stopped her speech about how Akito was doing this to save her and there to be love, said, "I'll entrust the ship and all her crew to you! Do you best!" Akito withdrew his argument. How could he complain when others needed his help?  
  
As his Aesti reached ground level, he felt the Nadesico begin it part of the operation. 'Only 10 minutes. I need to last 10 minutes, sounds simple enough.' His platform stopped and a site that made his blood run cold greeted him.  
  
An army of the insect like machines that had attacked the colony surrounded him. 'Screw this!' his mind hollowed as he turned the machine and began to run. Again, multiple view screens opened with many protesters to his actions. Having enough of both is cowardice and the complaints Akito turned and began fighting.  
  
Screaming, "Take that, and THAT!" as he destroyed unit after unit, he came to a revelation, 'I'm not that bad at this.' Although he was making a dent in the enemy force, he was being pushed back towards the ocean.  
  
His mind raced, 'How will this thing react to water?' With no time to find out, he felt himself falling further down. When he thought he had reached the water level, he felt a jerk. 'The Nadesico?'  
  
Sure enough, Akito's Aesti was standing like a hood ornament at the bow of the Nadesico. Utilizing its gravity blast cannon, the Nadesico eliminated the remaining enemy forces.  
  
--------  
  
Puzzled Akito opened a commlink to the bridge, "It hasn't been time yet. What happened?"  
  
Eyes bright and shining, "I rushed the schedule to help you! You did wonderfully Akito! Thank you."  
  
Other vid-windows opened, each with a different crewmember thanking Akito for saving the ship from destruction before it was even launched. Akito humbly accepted the platitudes, but the last one nearly caused him to suffer a heart attack.  
  
"Thank you Tenkawa-kun" a platinum haired young girl said to him.  
  
'Ruri.THAT'S RURI! But.but as a child! How.how is this possible! I have to know! And my parents!' So many questions, so much had to be answered. And nobody was listening to him. He tried to talk to Yurika, but she twisted his words into some sort of marriage proposal.  
  
The other crewmembers watched Akito and Yurika talk on two different levels and seem to have a conversation.  
  
Megumi looked at the view screen and thought, 'He's kinda cute.'  
  
Ruri simple said under her breath, "They're all idiots."  
  
-----------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Author Notes  
  
Well there you have it. Akito has officially made his way to the Nadesico. I hope you don't mind this chapter being what it was. I tried to keep it as far from an episode copy as possible, I think I have Akito's personality altered enough to have him be the same yet different.  
  
Hope you like this chapter and look forward to more chapters to come.  
  
Ja Mata  
  
Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com) 


	9. Questions and Answers

Standard Disclaimer  
  
Well I know many of you are upset, again with just cause. But please try to bear with me, an oh so busy fan fic writer. I'm trying to not favor any fic over another and I'm trying not to resort to my old adage of msting everything and writing original nothing. I'm trying.  
  
Hope you think the wait is worth it.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --  
  
Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai Chapter 9 - Question and Answer  
  
The water cascading from the showerhead felt wonderful on Akito's tired body. The past two weeks had a lot of notable events. However to his dismay none of them involved getting any of the answers he sought from both his now captain or of the young girl named Ruri Hoshino.  
  
'This just doesn't make sense. How could I have grown up with Ruri on Mars and yet meet her here, as a child.' Rubbing his eyes in frustration and to get the shampoo out of his eyes he recounted the previous few days. 'Yurika, she almost gave the Nadesico to her father all to ask him about my parents.'  
  
His mind was lost again to the past. He recounted the near capture of his new home. The military was planning on taking the ship from the private hands of Nergal and integrate it into the UN Spacy. The matter of the ships destination being told to the crew, one that called for great joy for Akito, 'She may still be alive!' He had his second official sortie shortly after. And again Ruri had overseen it, much to Akito's frustration.  
  
The battle brought a smile to Akito's face. Not because he was starting to enjoy his now found status as pilot, but because it was his first battle with Guy.  
  
"Guy," Akito said to the shower walls, "what a freak." But still the smile remained on his face. Despite the initial animosity that Guy had for Akito it wore off after learning they both shared a common hobby. Gekiganger.  
  
'He's so.dramatic. He's like a child in an adults body,' the now pilot thought. It was a quick friendship. The few times Akito had been allowed to be freed from both his pilot training and his time in the kitchen with Miss Houmei, Guy had forced him to view his collection.  
  
Now Akito was glad to be able to watch his show again, he'd rather have spent his time addressing his parents with Yurika, or the enigma this young Ruri presented.  
  
Suppressing a small blush, Akito's mind drifted to something he had not anticipated, 'Yurika. I haven't heard from her since.' He shook his head to clear his mind about his parents. 'She talked to her father on that battle ship. I just have to find the time to question 'her' about that talk.'  
  
"Well I think I spent enough time in here," Akito said to himself as he climbed out of the shower and dried off. 'Just have to work a shift in the kitchen then I can hunt down Ruri and talk to her. This is so confusing.'  
  
So wrapped in planning his line of questions, he didn't hear his door chiming. Slowly putting his underclothing on, Akito stopped stock still as his door opened on him. The intruder, one Yurika Misumaru, smiled happily at the underdressed man.  
  
He managed to say, "Y.Yurika?"  
  
Finally noticing his lack of dress, Yurika blushed and turned to face the door, "Hello Akito! I see you've grown into a healthy young man."  
  
"How did you get into my room?" Akito shouted as he quickly fastened his pants.  
  
Proving she wasn't one to be daunted by small concepts, "I'm the captain so I have the master key for every room. And don't worry, I forgive you this time."  
  
'This time, I hope she's not making a plan of doing this again.' Akito thought until he spoke, "I'm in a hurry what is it you need?" his voice a bit more hostile than he had wanted, but she had yet to prove her innocents.  
  
Either not noticing or simply not caring, Yurika chirped in response, "Well since Jun's not here I need somebody to talk to, and who better than my dearest Akito?" Her mind however told a different story she was deeply worried about the meeting she had to attend in the next few hours, and she hoped talking to her love would relax her. She had to address the full assembly of the UN Spacy and request they lower the Big Barrier so they could go to Mars.  
  
Shaking his head Akito thought, 'She's so odd, what does she mean by that she hardly knows me anymore.' He said to the still smiling girl, "I have to go." That being said he walked out of his room towards the mess hall. Yurika in tow.  
  
-----------  
  
"Akito.Akito.AKITO!" Yurika repeated to the stalking figure in front of her. Said man poignantly ignoring her.  
  
After the twentieth mantra Akito finally snapped just a few feet outside of his intended goal, "What is it Yurika? I have to get to my shift."  
  
Taking his hand in hers, "Why are you still treating me like this? I talked to daddy about your parents didn't I?"  
  
'She's actually right, she DID talk to the admiral, so that means she at least didn't know.' Letting his face relax from the hard expression he had to one of more caring, "I'm sorry, just a lot on my mind. Could we talk later maybe? After my shift?"  
  
'He wants to talk to me alone!' her eyes going wide and a blush forming as she envisioned something that Akito wasn't even contemplating. "Your so bold Akito. Sure I'll wait until after your shift," she beamed as Akito waved goodbye and walked into the mess hall. Her mind now turned too less important matters to her, their escape from the Earth.  
  
So as Yurika went to change into her kimono, Akito humbly apologized to Miss Houmei for being late. The elder woman said it was all right as she had witnessed to previous encounter with the captain and ordered him to work.  
  
Growing to like his station as a cook, Akito was much more pleased with Houmei's teaching as compared to his last boss. The environment was more laid back, odd for a battleship he often thought, and more supportive. The other cooks were friendly and helpful. And being at the mess hall allowed him a vantage point to see his fellow shipmates.  
  
He noted how Seiya Uribataki, the head engineer, often took his food to go. Megumi Reinard stayed in the hall, and it looked like she was watching him. He had only saw the child Ruri in the hall once, and she was leaving at the time.  
  
However today would be his lucky break, as fortune would have it. As Akito was putting the supper items in their proper place, the platinum haired child walked into the room. Nearly dropping the "Mars Bowl" on the ground, Akito quickly headed over to speak with Miss Houmei.  
  
His eyes pleading, "Can.can I take a break please?"  
  
Looking up from her pot, "A break so soon? You've only been working for about an hour."  
  
Bowing slightly and placing his hands in beggars' positions in front of his face, "I know but there is something I really need to do, and I don't know when I'll get another chance."  
  
Houmei was no fool on judging character. She knew this cook of hers wasn't the type to ask for something for no reason. She also knew something was slowly eating at him. But when she noticed the only person in the vicinity was Ruri, she was skeptical. "Does if have to do with that young girl over there?"  
  
Knowing how he looked at the moment, "It's not what you think, honest!"  
  
Looking at him, her eyes showing nothing but seriousness, "I hope, for your sake, that you're telling the truth. I know she's cute, but."  
  
Sensing her upcoming words, Akito preempted her, "She looks a lot like somebody very special to me.when 'she' was a child. I just want to know if their related, if.if she knows about.her death."  
  
'So that's it. He lost a loved one in the past. Well I know how he feels,' Houmei thought suppressing her own emotions about lost loves. "You have fifteen minutes. Good luck."  
  
Thanking the head chef, Akito took his apron off and walked out towards the girl. He noticed her viewing the different food items with skepticism. "The 'Mars Bowl' is are best seller you know."  
  
Turning her head, Ruri saw the face of the man that had saved the Nadesico, and herself twice. "Is that so Tenkawa-kun?"  
  
"Yeah," taking two down, "I'll get one for you, that way if you don't like it you won't have to pay for it."  
  
"Your not doing that because I am a child are you? That would be stupid," Ruri said in her usual monotone fashion.  
  
Her direct way of speaking sent Akito into a flashback of his Ruri. 'She talks like Ruri did when I first met her." Shaking his head and knowing honesty was the best course of action, "Basically it's a bribe. I want to talk to you a little bit and I thought if I got this for you, you'd be more willing."  
  
Blushing softly Ruri's mind contemplated the situation, 'He doesn't speak to me as a child as the other crew members do, that is most pleasant.' Nodding to her food supplier, the pair walked to a table, sat, and opened their meals. "You said you wished to speak to me?"  
  
A multitude of different approaches entered Akito's mind. He had been waiting for this chance for a long time, but know that he had it he couldn't figure out how to proceed. His mouth took the initiative and spoke, "Do you.have a sister?"  
  
'He wishes to speak of family?' Shaking her head slowly, "I have no family."  
  
Her manner of speaking again sent klaxons off in Akito's head, 'She's.sad. But if she doesn't have a family.what of 'my' Ruri?' Looking at the girl, he noticed her head had dropped, "Oh, I'm sorry if I brought up a touchy subject for you."  
  
Forcing her emotions back within herself she looked at the man again, "It's nothing."  
  
Defeated, Akito was lost again. The Ruri before him didn't know anything about his old friend. She was, if he judged correctly, about as lost as he was. So he decided to help her. He altered his questions to be of less important matters. He tried to lighten the girl's mood. He spoke of Gekiganger, recipes, and childhood jokes.  
  
As his fifteen minutes ended, he thanked the young girl for wasting her time talking to him and waved goodbye to her. He felt a little better about himself as he was able to get, however small it was, the girl to smile once.  
  
Houmei, watching the man return, asked how well things turned out. She could tell by his face that it wasn't well. Akito was seeking closure for an old wound that still hurt him to no ends, but his talk had only brought it back into focus for him. Unnoticed to the pair, Megumi had witnessed the encounter, she was touched by what she saw.  
  
Leaving her hiding place and heading towards the bridge her mind wandered, 'He's so sad, somebody should help cheer him up.'  
  
---------------  
  
As Akito tried to make sense of his current findings, and finish his work, Yurika was trying her best to leave the Earth with as little difficulty as possible. However the UN just didn't want to cooperate. Being more cunning that most gave her credit, and that she let on, her attempt at sex appeal did win her support from many of the countries assembled, yet not enough.  
  
The head speaker was adamant about shutting the Big Barrier down, even for a few minutes. So she simply told him that the Nadesico would break through it. His reaction was to quickly scramble the fighters, they'd take the Nadesico back, and their holding of a few UN officers as prisoners from the attempted Coo was more than enough provocation.  
  
Those on Earth were surprised when Junior Officer Aoi received a nano- machine injection and joined the fight. Jun looked up at the sky and thought to himself, 'I bet it's because of him, Akito Tenkawa, that this is happening.'  
  
The countdown had begun, soon the Nadesico would be under assault and hopefully the advanced battleship would soon be under UN Spacy control.  
  
---------------  
  
Not really knowing what to do, Akito simply strolled the hallways after his replacement came on duty. He had spoken to Yurika already, which didn't really help him learn about his parents, but it did relieve her of blame. He spoke to the Ruri Hoshino that was working on this ship and learned that she had no knowledge of his departed friend. He was out of leads, and had not received any of the answers he had hoped for.  
  
"But maybe I can help that little girl. She needs friends," he said to himself, unknowing that he had picked up a follower.  
  
Pounding his fellow pilot on the back, Guy proceeded to inquire to the cause of Akito's distress. Pushing it off as merely work fatigue. With out any reason to question him, Guy had a suitable solution, "Lets head to your room, I got my disks with me! I'll show you my favorite episode!"  
  
Allowing himself a large smile at Guy's expense, Akito headed to his room again, Guy in tow. Setting up the player was much easier now, after the few tries they already had, so Guy was quick to key up the episode he had mentioned.  
  
"So what makes this episode so special?" Akito asked as he saw the tears streaming down Guy's face already.  
  
In his most dramatic pose, "This is where Joe sacrifices himself for the good of the others! Its so full of red-blooded passion!"  
  
'Maybe he is a nutbar after all,' was the only thought that reached the man before the episode started and he quickly joined Guy in a bout of tears. The pair was so caught up in watching the episode, they failed to notice that their captain had let herself into Akito's room again, clad in her rather form fitting kimono.  
  
Profoundly confused at seeing the two men crying in each other's arms over a TV show and not noticing her, Yurika quickly left the room and headed to the bridge.  
  
-------------  
  
Megumi was sprawled over her consol. With nobody within communication range, her job was really boring. So she allowed herself a little daydream. One in which she mends the broken heart of the passionate new pilot she had just met. Blushing as her daydream took a decidedly adult turn, Ruri interrupted her.  
  
"Megumi-san, what is wrong?"  
  
Her revelry broken, Megumi blushed for an entirely different reason, being found out. "No reason, just a little fantasy that's all. Did I miss anything?"  
  
Across the bridge, Minato joined the conversation, "Already found a man on this ship?"  
  
Lowering her head, "Not.really, but I think I found a hopeful."  
  
Stunning Megumi, Minato said that she as well may have found somebody worth paying a little attention, the conversation could have continued along these lines if they alarm sirens didn't sound.  
  
The Admiral, who was listening to the young bridge officers with much enjoyment, was quick to his position. He was expecting something to happen, but the exact tactics the Earth would use were a mystery to him. A sudden crash brought his attention away from his computer screen to the captain's sprawled form on the floor.  
  
"Maybe you should change Miss Misumaru," he offered.  
  
However Yurika was goal oriented and not willing to leave her post to change while the alarms were sounding. Brushing herself off she regained her position. "So they're going to use force to stop us."  
  
Minato was quick to call up the sensor readings on the approaching units and their positions. Megumi brought up the comm. channels, however the result was expected. They were ordered to stop and hand over the Nadesico.  
  
"Scramble the Aestivalis!"  
  
----------------  
  
Ruri recounted the battle as being stupid. Not much was accomplished and a lot of pointless emotions were used. The second officer had returned and challenged Akito, who arrived late to the battle, to a duel.  
  
Yurika seemed oblivious to Jun's feelings about her. Akito seemed rather against fighting, again something Ruri found interesting. Guy.well Guy proved to be a rather odd pilot. Having been trained the others expected more from him than what occurred.  
  
At first Guy was surrounded and captured, then when the proposed duel started, he single handedly dispensed with all the other units. Leaving the onlookers to wonder, which was the real Guy.  
  
In the end, after Jun attempted to sacrifice himself to defend the Nadesico from the 2nd defensive line only to be saved by Akito and Guy, the ship breached the Big Barrier and reached outer space. A marvel in the young girls eyes as this ship was 'a ship of fools.'  
  
------------------  
  
Looking at his Gekiganger stickers, Guy was on cloud nine. He got his own space Ganger. He had a fellow pilot that enjoyed his passions. He was allowed to show his skill to the world.  
  
"Life is good," he said confidently. Movement suddenly caught his eyes. "Hey what are you guys."  
  
His words cut short as a round was fired into his lung and his body sank to the ground. Guy hadn't suspected the captives to have escaped, let alone be armed.  
  
As his life's blood left his body only one thing came to his mind, "I'm sorry Miss Nanako, I won't be able to take you to the beach like I promised."  
  
-------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Author Notes  
  
Well its done. It's defiantly a change from the original story line but following the same path. So I'm happy with that. I don't think Ruri was too OOC, Megumi maybe.but then again prolly not.  
  
So the Nadesico has left earth and is headed for Mars! What will befall our beloved crew? Will Yurika steal Akito's heart? Will Megumi make her play? Or will Akito remain aloof?  
  
All this and more in the next thrilling installment of.um.I forget  
  
Ja Mata  
  
Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com) 


	10. Reasons

Standard Disclaimer  
  
I don't really own anything of Nadesico. Save two wall-scrolls and one art book. Plus the DVD's of course.  
  
Well I've neglected this story for quite a while. Sorry about that but I have other items that require my attention as well.  
  
Some of you noticed the slight change in the story over the past 2/3 chapters. Reason for that is its concepts of the story I don't really find important. More like the back-story or neo-prologue. I hope to keep your interest. Things will be changing again so I hope you like it.  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai  
  
Chapter Ten- Reasons  
  
The Nadesico was a ship of emotional confusion. While they had much to be happy about, they had just as much to be saddened by. By escaping the Big Barrier they were assured that Earth would no longer hinder their objective of reaching Mars. This freedom came at a cost however Guy's life.  
  
The death of Guy was especially hard on Akito. Who now simply lie in his room watching the disks that were left behind when Guy's other possessions where shipped back to Earth.  
  
'Am I cursed?' Akito mused to himself as he replayed Joe's death scene again. 'Whenever I get close to somebody they die. My parents, Ai-chan, Guy, and.Ruri.' Looking around the somber room, Akito realized he needed some air. Knowing he couldn't truly get fresh air he took the next best alternative and headed to the relaxation room. 'It at least looks like nature.'  
  
As he made his way to the simulated lakeside, Akito passed a few of his fellow shipmates. They treated him kindly but he didn't want to get to close to any of them. Having been hurt so much in the past by close relationships, he was hard pressed to try his luck again. Unfortunately for the young pilot, a few women aboard the Nadesico had other plans for him.  
  
-------------------  
  
The bridge crew was actively obeying their captain's orders. They were preparing to dock the vessel at the nearby space colony for fresh supplies and a new grouping of pilots. The task was only a minor annoyance as Nergal was yet to automate the process but Minato was confident in her ability to guide the ship.  
  
Ruri was busily connecting Omaikane to the colony's central computer to gain its updated star charts and supply manifest. The comm. officer, Megumi, was just connecting the audio channels.  
  
In an almost playful tone she addressed the station, "Come in Setsuki Medora 2. This is the Mobile battleship Nadesico."  
  
Despite the bit of distortion the reply was quick, "This is Setsuki Medora 2, you are go for docking. And might I say that's a sweet voice you."  
  
Megumi looked at her consol for a moment in disbelief, how could she have lost the transmission at such a short distance. As she tried to re- establish the connection the vid-screen display brought shock to all on- lookers.  
  
While the other crewmembers looked on in silence, Ruri announced the grim fact, "The Setsuki Medora space station has been destroyed."  
  
With her primal instincts kicking in, Yurika jumped into action, "Scan all frequencies for survivors! Megumi focus!"  
  
Hearing the captain address her so forcefully snapped they young officer out of her shocked daze as she began the fruitless task of trying to find any emergency signals.  
  
The Admiral looked at the carnage with somewhat of expectation. He had known they would find death, he just didn't know it would be so soon.  
  
------------------  
  
Akito wasn't really caring that he was back in his room again, this time with a service pistol in his hand. Not being on the bridge, he wasn't informed of the stations destruction, all he knew was that a possible intruder was on board. "What are the chances they'd come to my room anyway," he said to himself as he again watched Joe die.  
  
What sounded like a muffled cry came from the ceiling above him, his pilot training taking over, his weapon was level at the offending noise. In the end it did him little good. The sound was quickly identified as a woman, a crying woman that had just fallen on him.  
  
Her body actually wracked with tears, "JOE! IT'S NOT FAIR!"  
  
Just as Akito was about to try and console the crying woman, she stopped crying, and in fact looked like she hadn't even been crying the few moments before. She apologized and crawled off him. Taking a few seconds to look at her, Akito guessed she was a pilot as she was dressed in the female version of his own Aestivalis pilot suit.  
  
He waited for the woman to say something, but when she just stared at him he attempted to initiate the conversation, "Um.who are you, and what were you doing in the ceiling?"  
  
"Hikaru Amano! Aestivalis pilot and doujinshi artist extraordinaire!" Hikaru accentuated each bout of information by blowing on her thumb that caused two tape rolls to extend form her head in a bizarre parody of antenna.  
  
The man just looked at the spectacle and shook his head. 'Can't my life be normal for at least one day?'  
  
----------------  
  
During Akito's rather unique meeting with Hikaru, Yurika and a detachment of armed personnel proceeded to the hanger bay were an unknown Aestivalis had just shut down. Ryoko wasn't to pleased with her sudden need for escape, nor her tow job. One moment she was training, the next she was rushing for her life. She didn't even know if her lance-mates had survived.  
  
So when Yurika arrived, Ryoko wasn't in the most chipper mood. Thinking the rather flighty woman before her was nothing but an ensign at most; Ryoko dismissed her and tried to leave.  
  
Yurika formally introduced herself, much to Ryoko's disbelief, as the captain. Goat asked her about her cargo and was depressed to learn that of the entire detachment of Zero-G frames, only one was possibly left at the base. The conversation was interrupted as Izumi made her overdramatic introduction.and Ryoko's violent reaction to it.  
  
Upon leaving for a formal debriefing, much to the new arrivals displeasure, Akito arrived with Hikaru. The assembled crew headed towards the elevator and after a few moments of confusion, forced everybody into the small cell.  
  
"So what happened to the pilots you were supposed to have?" Ryoko asked off- handedly as the elevator slowly began its accent.  
  
Passing a quick look at Akito, Yurika was tempted to put off the question until he was out of earshot but the look the other pilots were giving her forced her action. "One was killed and the other is only a substitute."  
  
Hikaru turned her head, forcing Yurika to move forward to allow it, looked at the man at the door, "You're only a temp?"  
  
'I guess they don't expect me to be of much use either,' Akito thought as his thoughts sunk again, his answer was solemn, "Yeah, I'm only a temp pilot. I'm actually one of the ships cooks."  
  
Yurika was hurt just to look at the pain in Akito's eyes. She would have tried to encourage him but the door opened and he quickly escaped the tight confines of the elevator. She would talk to him later, after the debriefing.  
  
-------------  
  
Ruri's navigation reports of the following incident read like a comedy. After the recount from pilots Subaru, Amano, and Maki a salvage mission was ordered. Akito, growing tired of brooding over Guy's death and wishing to honor his fallen comrade, joined the trio. She noted that Akito had never piloted a Zero-G frame before and it showed in his early performance.  
  
Ruri also noted that much of the actual mission was observable only via audio channels. The crew was mostly laughing at Akito grumbling about stumbling around or flying into walls, and Ryoko's questioning of Akito's mentality.  
  
Yurika pointed out that by finding Jovian mecha in the destroyed hanger bay most likely pointed to sabotage and not accident for the stations destruction.  
  
Akito, leaving the ship again in his debt for a successful operation, stopped the near successful attack by the Grasshopper corrupted frame. The notion did a great deal to help with his dropping self-esteem.  
  
After they dismounted, Ryoko approached the smiling male and slapped his back, "You did good. You just need to practice more."  
  
"I'll keep that in mind, thank you Ryoko-san," Akito replied with as much sincerity as he could muster.  
  
Blushing softly at the comment, Ryoko quickly walked off followed by her two friends, who were giggling about something Akito couldn't tell.  
  
------------  
  
After the next two weeks, the combat high fled from the bodies of the Nadesico, they were free to mourn for the passing of the colonists. Megumi found herself sitting on the fake grass looking out at the stars. The last transmission she received playing over and over in her head.  
  
"The others.they act like it wasn't really people. Sure they're having funerals, but its just an action," she muttered to herself and trying to suppress the urge to break down and cry. A sound behind her caught her attention. Turning to hear what caused the soft rustling behind her she quickly identified its source, "Akito?"  
  
Sitting up from his previously declined position, Akito noticed he wasn't as alone as he thought, "Hello Megumi."  
  
The man's presence drastically altered Megumi's thought process. While she was still in a slight depression, she was no longer thinking about the tragedy that had so recently occurred. She was thinking about, "What's wrong Akito?"  
  
The true matter for Akito's current state resulted from an encounter twenty minutes prior to his sitting down with Megumi. He had spotted Ruri eating in the mess hall again and was reminded of his childhood. Thinking about the similarities in both Ruri's made Akito's mind reel. The only thing he could think of to explain how two girls could be almost exactly the same in every way but at different times was that Ruri was some government project. He reasoned that the Ruri's were the product of some sort of test on cloning. He didn't think any less of either of them for it, and he didn't know if it was the real reason, but it was the most believable concept he had come up with.  
  
Not wanting to scare the woman with his odd notions he replied with another worry of his, "Will it matter when I die?"  
  
Feeling her emotions surge within her, "Of course it would matter 'if' you die. What makes you say that?"  
  
"Guy gave his life for this ship, the colonist died and people just gave a momentary head-service to it. Is that my fate, to be forgotten?" he tried to lose the somber tone he had been using so much lately but failed.  
  
"I'd never forget you," Megumi confessed and was glad the light of the room hid the amber hint in her cheeks.  
  
Giving the girl a genuine smile he thanked her, "It means a lot Megumi, it really does."  
  
His smile gave Megumi all the courage she needed to slide over next to him. Akito changed the subject to small matters in Megumi's life. She was happy to talk to him, but despite her growing courage, couldn't ask him about his relationship with the captain. The whole crew knew 'something' was going on between them, just what it was remained a total mystery.  
  
The pair left the room separately but in better moods than they had in a long time. Akito was still leery about becoming too friendly with Miss Reinard however.  
  
-------------  
  
Being the captain was a challenging position, but Yurika was more than competent to fulfill the role. However her current task was infuriating her. Behind her façade of the bubbly slightly airheaded captain, Yurika desperately wanted to be with Akito. She had noticed he had been fairly distant from her and she didn't want that. She loved him so deeply it was etched into her soul. So when she saw him spending more time with the other cooks and the new female pilots, she defiantly didn't want to spend all her spare time fulfilling Nergal company regulations.  
  
Masking her voice in a light whine, "Why do I have to perform the ceremony again?"  
  
Prospector sighed as he pushed his glasses up on his nose again, "We can't afford to have priests, rabbis, shamans, and all the other required religious figures so you as captain fill that role."  
  
Dressed in a Shinto priestess robe, Yurika crossed her arms and stopped her mad dash to the next hall. She wasn't going to move another step until she saw Akito. Jun however was not one to just stop in the hall, "Yurika we have to keep going, and we have five more ceremonies to get to today."  
  
"But I want to see Akito!"  
  
Behind the group a loud shout and a low rumble signaled they're group was joined, "GET OUT OF THE WAY!!"  
  
At the sound of her beloved's voice Yurika quickly rejoiced, but her hopes were dashed as the cook was pushing a rather large cart of steaming food. As not only he passed but almost the entire cooking staff did as well, Yurika remembered that not only did they have to have a ceremony for the departed but also have group receptions.  
  
'If we get done fast enough, I can catch up with him.' That thought fueled Yurika's determination. Rushing off to the next ceremony Yurika was going to get her chance to talk to Akito and nobody would stop her. "We are the children of the SUN!"  
  
-------------  
  
Time continued to pass on board the Nadesico as they neared Mars. Akito slowly gained back his confidence. Yurika finished the funeral rights. Jun still tried to gain Yurika's favor. All in all the ship was in a pleasant mood. The autopilot continued to force the lumbering hulk of metal through space to its destination. However as the ship piloted itself, it left little for those on duty to really so. Such time was often filled with pointless banter.  
  
"Is it me or is this job really boring at times?" Megumi asked as she listened to the dead communications relay.  
  
Lounging over her station, Minato agreed, "I was tempted to sleep in again, but five days a week is a bit much."  
  
Megumi took a moment to spy up at the empty captain's chair, "Where's the captain at anyway?"  
  
The only other member on deck answered, "Captain Misumaru is currently at the mess hall."  
  
"Thank you Ruri-Ruri," Minato chirped to the young girl, "speaking of the captain. What do you think about her?"  
  
Megumi plainly didn't care much for Yurika, mainly because she was competition. "Lets not talk about that right now."  
  
Working as a secretary, Minato knew the tall-tell signs of emotional actions, and to her Megumi was screaming her true feelings. "So.does that have anything to do with a certain pilot?"  
  
Being bored herself, Ruri decided to listen in as the topic of Akito was brought up. She saw the man that treated her as a person and not a child an odd occurrence. 'He's very childlike himself.'  
  
Taking another fleeting look at the empty command station Megumi nodded, "Kinda, I talked to him a few days ago on the recreation deck."  
  
Never one to pass up good gossip, Minato pressed the topic, "How that go? Good by the looks of it."  
  
"It went.well. We talked that's about it. He just seems so lost at times."  
  
"And you want to be the one to find him?"  
  
Blushing softly, Megumi couldn't deny she wanted to be the one Akito went to when he felt down. "I want to try something with him. But what about the captain?"  
  
The gossiping women didn't notice that now the commanding officer was now on deck and listening to their discussion. "You know how I used to work as a secretary right. Well from my experience it never works out when the woman has a superior position to the man. They get indigent. Men can't stand having the woman be the one in control. Men seem to think that if they're not in control it's not right."  
  
"I don't think Akito's like that though," Megumi admitted, "anyway not like the captain and he are really an item. I doubt he likes her the way she likes him or they'd be sharing a room. You ever wonder if it even matter who the captain is in this day and age?"  
  
From her position above them, Yurika couldn't stand it anymore. She had worked long and hard for her position, fighting against sexism, racism, and countless other hurdles for her station as captain, and how dare they insinuate that Akito couldn't like her. All the stress from the past few days and now the verbal abuse caused Yurika's mask of pleasantness to break as tears streamed down her face. 'I have to get out of here!'  
  
After the wail was heard and registered Ruri walked over to Megumi and told her plainly, "Miss Reinard, that was a very cruel thing to say."  
  
-------------  
  
"Take that you damn grasshopper!" Ryoko triumphantly screeched as she destroyed another flying mecha.  
  
The four Aestivalis were battling for the Nadesico's right to land on Mars. Of the combatants only Akito seemed to be following protocol.  
  
Izumi seemed to like dissecting the Jovian fighters before finishing them off. Much like a child played with insects. Hikaru would often follow her around and they would call out odd names of attacks before making an action.  
  
Ryoko was making a sport of seeing how many of the small pests she could take out in one maneuver.  
  
Akito watched them fight with a sense of awe and worry. "We're the ones protecting this ship.the hell with it," he eyed the carrier and charged at it. Noticing that the others were hovering close by he wondered why. He soon learned as the larger vessel's protective shield shot off his Aesti.  
  
"Tenkawa you idiot. You can't breach that shield! We'll need the Nadesico to fire its Gravity blast cannon!" Ryoko informed the man.  
  
Izumi's face followed Ryoko's but her message was far from clear, "We'll change your name to Fred, cause you'll be dead," she then laughed her self into a coughing fit.  
  
"No we don't," Akito announced to his lance-mates, "You just need to hit it the right way." Eying up his approach Akito launched himself at the last enemy, "GEKIGAN-FLARE!"  
  
Viewing the battle from the helm, Ruri asked those who were listening, "What's a Gekigan-flare?"  
  
Everybody just shook their heads'; nobody really knew why Akito had said that they just knew it was successful. Megumi quickly removed her headset and ran from the room. Yurika was quick to follow.  
  
Her mind an emotional roller coaster, Yurika hadn't seen the comm. officer leave. Yurika had run into Akito just prior to the battle in the meditation room. She wasn't to proud that she all but jumped Akito after she finished meditating but she just wanted to be close to him so bad. She was glad that after the embarrassment lowered that he did talk to her for a while. It meant that she did have a chance with her long lost childhood friend.  
  
Reaching the hanger after recovering from a quick fantasy about Akito walking into her room as she was showering, time slowed to a crawl. Yurika quickly scanned the bay for Akito and found he wasn't alone Megumi was with him. Breath caught in her throat, Yurika watched as Megumi's lips clenched and she leaned forward to kiss her love.  
  
Akito lowered his head and kissed Megumi, on the forehead. Both girls' eyes opened wider than before, Yurika in relief, Megumi was both frustrated and glad at the same time. He HAD kissed her, maybe not like she would have wanted but she reasoned his past maybe hindering any deep emotional attachment. 'I'll wait and when he does kiss me, it will mean he's all mine.'  
  
In her daze, Yurika returned to the bridge to oversee the final descent, wondering if she should he happy or sad about the current events she just witnessed.  
  
------------  
  
Minato looked at the view screen with a hint of worry, "What are those things in the atmosphere?"  
  
Prospector again readjusted his glasses before answering, "Nanomachines, they're being used to Terre form the planet. They're nothing to be worried about."  
  
"He's right, I remember people used to inhale them all the time, the come out just the same a few days later." Yurika stopped her dialogue quickly and turned a rather dark shade of red. Admitting to eating and excreting microscopic machines was not on her high list of things to do. However her admission related one piece of information to the rest of the crew that they didn't know. Yurika, much like Akito, was from Mars.  
  
Ruri looked at the scene and couldn't stop herself, "Baka."  
  
The ship reached the surface soon after and at a different location on the ship the Admiral was soon beset by Akito, "I'd like to borrow an Aestivalis please."  
  
Overhearing the talk via audio channel Prospector declined the request, "We need all the pilots to head to the Nergal research facility. If there are any survivors they could be there."  
  
Voice laden with distrust, Ryoko replied as Akito tried his request again, "You just want to do Nergal a service first you parasite!"  
  
"What do you want to take an Aestivalis for?" the wizened man questioned.  
  
"My home.I'd like to back to it," Akito said trying to hold back the flood of emotions that followed that word, home. His body composure did more to convince the Admiral than the speech did. His request was granted and Akito rushed to his transport, and found he was going to have a passenger.  
  
------------  
  
Standing by a ruined building surrounded by craters was not how Megumi pictured Akito's home. Knowing Mars was still being changed, and that the attack caused massive damage, she expected some ruble, not the entire city devastated.  
  
She leaned closer to Akito as he shifted the dirt in his hand. The two had talked again as Akito piloted the mecha to its destination. Megumi was determined to win the heart of this man before her. Stacking the deck a little, she had changed into a skirt and made a point to sit above Akito so whenever he looked at her he'd get a quick peak at her. 'A girl must be willing to make a few sacrifices for love,' she reasoned for her rather bold tactics.  
  
Asking why he wanted to be a cook, Akito showed his dirt filled hand to her. The nanomachines worked their magic of molecular reconfiguration on the soil. "I could never stand the taste of the food. But if prepared well even the most bland items can taste great. But I guess it's just a dream now."  
  
Knowing that his change in position was the cause in his wistful expression, "Why is it just a dream? You're a cook on the Nadesico right? So what if you pilot too?"  
  
"I doubt I'd be that good of a cook. Just because you want something, doesn't mean you're destined to have it," Akito said softly. Memories of his Ruri entered his mind, 'Yeah, just because you love somebody and they love you.doesn't mean it'll be all happily ever after.' Turning to head back to the Aestivalis, his dreams of finding Ruri again crushed, the ground gave way underneath him and he plummeted down.  
  
Not paying attention to Akito's action, Megumi continued to talk, "I want to be there for you Akito. I think I love you.Akito?" Letting out a startled scream as the ground dislodged from under her feet, Megumi was surprised that the fall didn't hurt at all. Looking around her new surroundings she was about to call for Akito but a new presence identified itself first.  
  
"Miss, that man you're on doesn't look to good."  
  
Finding the source of the voice, Megumi's eyes fixed on it. Two figures dressed in robes stood before her, one with a red visor over her eyes the other had a dark plastic respirator over its face.  
  
Pulling herself off Akito's chest, Megumi helped the prone man to his feet. The two strangers just watched and talked to each other. Wiping the dust from his eyes, Akito took in the sight of the two. One was obviously a woman, the cloak did little to hide her figure, the other seemed to be a man, but the respirator hid his entire face.  
  
The woman spoke first, "I take it you're here for a rescue mission."  
  
'Survivors! Ruri MAY still be alive!' Akito addressed the woman openly, "Yes, were from the Nadesico, we came to save you."  
  
"Who are you?" Megumi asked a tad put off at how the woman was eyeing Akito.  
  
Heading back to a small fire, the woman answered, "Inez Fressange, my friend here is Nakushita Hitori. He lost most of his repertory tract in an accident so don't expect him to speak much."  
  
The man gave the pair a head nod at the mention of his name, "Come we have much to talk about."  
  
------------  
  
"I say we put her in the brig when we find her," Yurika said to the empty seat that Megumi usually occupied.  
  
Reveling in the open hostility Yurika had for Megumi over Akito, Minato added fuel to the fire. "Why? Its not like we need her right now is it?"  
  
Knowing that Minato was right, and that her only problem with the current situation was that Megumi was exactly were she wanted to be, Yurika answered in her scripted and trademark voice, "Yeah but it's the principle."  
  
Closing a video link with Prospector, Jun informed Yurika that the scout team had encountered a small enemy detachment on their way back from the Nergal facility but had easily defeated them. Jun couldn't explain why pilot's Amano and Maki were chanting 'Tenkawa' over and over again.  
  
"Now that we have them back on board we must acquire the missing members of our crew, Ruri ready for take-off," Yurika ordered.  
  
Edging forward in his chair next the Yurika, the Admiral felt a familiar chill run down his spine something was coming. "Is that wise captain?"  
  
'I don't care if it's wise, I want Akito away from her,' Yurika thought as she set a course for the transmitter Akito's transport was sending. The flight to the modified Aestivalis was a very quick one, and once they spotted them Ruri took Megumi's place and tried to contact them.  
  
Several unsuccessful attempts later, Yurika opened a direct channel to the outside and announced their arrival over loud speakers. Her attempt worked as Akito, Megumi, Inez, and Nakushita crawled out of fissure in the ground. A Shuttle escorted them back inside the Nadesico just as the first wave of Jovian's attacked.  
  
-----------  
  
Yurika felt sick to her stomach. To save her crew she sacrificed the lives of the 'survivors.' All she could think of was Akito's eyes on her. Waiting for her to make her choice, their lives or the colonist. According to that blond woman, even if she didn't raise the shields they would have died.  
  
'It's because I ran to get him.that I couldn't stand the thought of somebody else with him!' Yurika berated herself. 'I want to cry so bad right now.I don't want to act like some air headed bimbo to keep the male crew motivated. I want to be how I was with Akito myself. And because of that people died.'  
  
Her self-defacement ceased when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Her voice reflected her mind lost and afraid, "Akito."  
  
Looking at the woman before him, Akito was stunned. She wasn't the 'nut- bar' he usually saw her as. "Yurika, its not your fault. This would have happened eventually."  
  
Her eyes locking onto his and not wavering, "I know.that eventually the Jovians would have found them.but it was my carelessness that took their lives."  
  
Gripping the suddenly fragile woman in his arms Akito tried again, "Snap out of it Yurika. We need you to get us of this planet. You can do it.if you try."  
  
Taking his hand in hers, "This is the first time you've been so nice to me.since you got on board."  
  
"Yurika?"  
  
Softly pulling his hand downward and lowering his head, Akito found Yurika kissing him. Not a hard or forceful kiss, it was more attune to a ghost kiss. Ending just as quickly as it happened, Yurika smiled as Akito fled the room after an apology. 'Thank you dearest.that meant more to me than words ever could.'  
  
Feeling herself revitalized by the minute contact with her love, Yurika started back for the bridge only to encounter Megumi. Passing the girls comments about trying to win 'her' Akito's heart as war banter, which infuriated Megumi, Yurika had plans to make.  
  
----------  
  
"So how have things changed on board?" Inez asked as she sat down in the quarters provided for her.  
  
Taking off the rather cumbersome and heavy full head repertory mask, letting her now shoulder length pale blue hair down, her companion sighed heavily. "Akito's the same, if not a little more withdrawn. Megumi is trying for his affection a great deal more and the captain.I don't know."  
  
"I know this is going to be hard for you. I mean you even know the colonists were doomed didn't you, being on the ship I mean."  
  
Wiping her tears away, "At least I know he survived. I.I just want to be with him though! I love him so much."  
  
Taking the crying girl into her arms as she had done so many times before, "Its ok Ruri. We just have to make sure.that whatever caused the young you to go back in time happens.or you won't exist."  
  
"But how can I see him, live with him, be around him and not tell him I'm alive!"  
  
"It would destroy space-time.we have to play very carefully with this. Its dangerous that you even told me about this," Inez stopped and took out the only surviving object that Ruri still owned, "One day you can give this back to him."  
  
Ruri took the spotless Gekiganger doll into her hands, 'Will he love me.when I come back or will he.love somebody else?'  
  
Geki didn't respond.  
  
----------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Author Notes  
  
Well another chapter down, and a lot of stuff has happened during it! Ruri is back on the Nadesico. And before you question its possibility think of this, Both Ai and Inez existed in the same time.can't have an old Inez and young Ai without some time sharing.  
  
My original idea was that Akito kept Geki and gave it to Ai, who in turn kept it all her life and when Akito meet up with her at the Cave noticed she had him.and Inez's lost memory returned.but that would result in one to many females attempting for Akito's heart.  
  
As for Yurika kissing Akito.yes in the Anime she said she never kissed a boy before and wanted to save her first.well this isn't the anime its my series. And I think Yurika would be a bit more willing to kiss Akito when she wasn't trying to be on par with Megumi.  
  
Well hope you liked it and I hope to get some good feedback.or at least SOME feedback.  
  
Ja Mata  
  
Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com) 


	11. Giving Back

Standard disclaimer  
  
I don't own Nadesico, sorry if you think I did. I apologize for the lateness of this chapter but life has a way of taking time very quickly from people. I'm not a support manager at my new job so that takes time. Schoolwork is taking a lot of time, SQL, COBOL, JCL, and writing projects oh my! And when I do have a few hours off from work I'm dead tired, but I'm going to keep trying!  
  
Hope you bear with me and still enjoy the story. Well I've talked enough about my problems.  
  
-----------------------  
  
Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai Chapter 11- Giving Back  
  
"Are you sure you have to do this?" Ruri asked with a hint of panic in her voice.  
  
Shifting through a bag that Howmei generously provided her, Inez looked up at the woman before her, "I have to do something or I'll lose my mind."  
  
Still unwanting to let it slide, "But couldn't you do something else?"  
  
Smiling at her two finds, Inez pulled them out of the bag and showed them to Ruri, "Of course I could, but I don't want to. So do you like the frog suit or the overalls?"  
  
Thinking of how much she hated those damn overalls and the whole "Get to know the Nadesico" experience, Ruri was tempted to press her argument. She couldn't comprehend how after two days of being back on the ship Inez could think of doing this show. "Well what do you want the cloths to portray?"  
  
Her smile growing a bit larger, "Well I chose Yurika's to hid her body, why Kami-sama decided to 'bless' her like that is beyond me."  
  
"As for my younger self?" Ruri questioned.  
  
Flatly Inez said, "I want to embarrass you of course. That young you is so stiff and formal."  
  
'Of course' Ruri thought as she remembered that was exactly how she felt at the time. "I say the frog suit go for an all animal show." She said hoping to spare her self at least some embarrassment from the whole endeavor.  
  
"The coveralls it is. Now remember what I said about altering the time line 'Nakushita Hitori'," the blond scientist said as she tossed the clothing onto the pile set aside for the show. Their shared quarters looking like a backdrop for a Doctor Seuss special gone horribly wrong, she didn't mind adding to the clutter.  
  
"INEZ!" Ruri shouted in surprise. She was still having trouble of understanding her old boss turned only confidant's mind.  
  
Reverting into her lecturing voice, Inez instructed Ruri. "I figured that you'd try to help your younger self out. If you felt embarrassed in one suit over the other you'd obviously try to make me use the other. Oh, and you better keep your voice down, wouldn't do us much good for the crew to hear an unknown female voice from inside our quarters."  
  
Grumbling slightly, Ruri complied to keep her voice down, but the lecture brought up several questions in the woman's mind. "Inez, can I ask you a few questions that I've been thinking about?"  
  
Fluffing the bunny suit for maximum size, "Never stopped you before from asking, not like I can offer you much help though."  
  
"For starters, was it a sick joke that you named me 'Nakushita Hitori?"  
  
"I think it fits you quite well," Inez replied with a hint of mirth in her voice.  
  
Reaching for her respirator mask, "Naming me 'Lost One' isn't funny. I don't really like being reminded of this every time somebody talks to me. Second question, what happened to the other Akito?"  
  
Inez actually stopped her preparations, unlike the name that came to her at the spur of the moment; she had given some thought to this boson-jumping incident. Being the forefront leader in terran boson jumping science, she did have some previous knowledge on the matter. "I think he went where he was planning to."  
  
Not being accustomed to being unable to follow, Ruri was slightly jilted, "I don't understand you."  
  
Broken from her revelry, Inez began the job of gathering all the required items for her show, and when her arms were covered she handed the remaining items to Ruri, who was now fully in her disguise. "I don't think boson jumping is just teleportation in a location sense. You told me that Akito once teleported two weeks into the past." She waited for Ruri to snap on the last of the straps on her helmet before continuing. "So it is possible that the jump can take somebody not only to the place they want to be, but also WHEN they want to be."  
  
"That still doesn't account for Akito's location," Ruri said, her voice distorted by the 'respirator's' voice modulation.  
  
Stopping at the door of their room, Inez offered Ruri this last bit of information before she walked into public, "He probably went to the test location while you went back in time.so there is no alternate Akito."  
  
---------------------------  
  
"Three.Two.One.KABOOM"  
  
"HI KIDS!" Yurika chirped in her rabbit disguise, slightly disgusted but also enjoying the silly costume. "It's time to GET TO KNOW THE NADESICO."  
  
While the last part was said in tandem with the young Ruri, her voice was nearly blotted out by the now fully in-character Captain. From behind the camera, Inez was hard pressed not to burst into a fit of laughter by Yurika's sudden zeal for the role. Had she had known Yurika was hoping for a certain male to see her in her cute costume and want to get a closer look, and to get back the 'item' she purloined from his quarters, she may not have been so quick to put the captain off.  
  
She had to stop her actors however when Ruri had yet to actually say a line while facing the camera, "CUT! Ruri do you know who this is being made for?"  
  
The young tech turned to the camerawoman, "Your own amusement?"  
  
Yurika looked slack-jawed at the girl who said exactly what she was thinking but dared not, "Now Ruri, I'm sure Miss Fressange has a good reason for making this."  
  
"Actually she is partially right," Inez admitted, "But eventually I'm sure we'll get back to earth and when we can show this to little children."  
  
Yurika noticed that Nakushita slowly made his way out of the room and was replaced by Goat. She didn't know much about Nakushita, save that he was Inez's assistant and would often visit the mess hall. Yurika wondered at that as she never saw the man actually eat, she didn't either she was there to watch Akito cook or hopefully talk to him.  
  
"Miss Fressange what are you doing? We're in dire straights! We can't escape Mars, our shields are low, and we're surrounded by the enemy is this some sort of joke!" The large military man asked in a tone nobody in the room really cared for.  
  
Not one to like having her actions questioned, Inez's tone dripped with irritation and anger, "No, the joke would be your attempt at a rescue. Saving only two lives is hardly a successful mission."  
  
Yurika saw the two's argument had the potential for an actual fight and sought about a quick solution, even if she knew she had to lower herself again to achieve it. Making full use of her talents and her current appearance, Yurika set out to look and sound as cute as she possibly could.  
  
Watery eyed and gushing, Yurika addressed Goat, "Please Mr. Horrey let us film? We just want to bolster the crews feelings.so please let us film?" She felt sick to her stomach having to beg and act like a fool, but if it helped move things along with no damage or further degradation she'd do it.  
  
Inez however wasn't to keen on letting the large man off the hook, "It's Nergal's fault for this. They gave you all misinformation about what to expect on this planet. But then again my opinion is bit skewed."  
  
Ruri took this moment to enter the conversation, "I agree, you are an odd person."  
  
Looking at her one-day apprentice, Inez smiled, "Well if you'd have had my upbringing you'd be strange too," Inez then told the assembled crew of her being found in the Martian desert. In her mind however, Inez thought of something, her childhood was much like Ruri's only she wasn't teleported in time nor had a savior like she did, that she knew.  
  
Be it Yurika's overt cuteness and wiles, or Inez's fairly sad recounting of her past, Goat found himself wearing a pair of ears himself and running the camera as Inez joined the on-stage actors.  
  
--------------  
  
Akito was not very happy. For some reason his day just continued to get stranger and stranger. First he accidentally ran into the Admiral and knocked him to the ground. After helping the ageing man up and dusting him off, it appeared that the man was actually looking for Akito.  
  
After admitting the Admiral into his quarters, Akito was both shocked and gladdened by the gift the man offered him. Not one to drink heavily, Akito instantly noticed the spiked tea, but found it actually quite soothing. The hint of sake worked wonders on the stress he was feeling.  
  
He needed that soothing as the Admiral seemed fond on not saying anything and just watching him drink. After an odd exchange of words, mostly from the Admiral, Akito was left with the tea service.  
  
Just as he saw the elderly man standing to leave, the vid screen that was droning in the background caught his attention.  
  
Shock gripped the pilot at what he saw, "MY GEKIGANGER LIMITED FIGURE!" Rushing out of the room, leaving a very confused and slightly agitated Admiral, Akito was rushing down the hallway of the Nadesico towards where he hoped he'd find the amateur filmmakers. As luck would have it however he again slammed his body into another.  
  
Standing over the body of one of the two new crewmembers, Akito extended his hand, "Sorry Nakushita, I was in a hurry. You ok?"  
  
From behind her mask, Ruri's breath was stolen from her. Before her eyes was the object of her dearest affections, but she couldn't do anything. With a slight prayer to Inez for installing the voice modulator again she responded in her now raspy clearly masculine voice, "No harm done."  
  
Gripping the gloved hand with his own, Akito was shocked at how small it felt in his own. Hefting the figure to its feat proved to shatter the previous comment as Nakushita collapsed back to the ground. "Nakushita? You sure you're alright?"  
  
Gripping her suddenly throbbing ankle, Ruri had no choice but to shake her head no. From the months under the Martian soil, Ruri had her run in with medical problems, her leg wasn't in any serious trouble, but it would hurt like hell if she walked on it. "Its just a slight sprain from the fall. Be fine in a few hours."  
  
His concern for the relic of Guy's memory fading in place of concern for the unfortunate man he hurt, Akito wasn't going to let it slide. "Let me help you to your quarters at least ok?"  
  
'Still kind to everybody you meet,' Ruri thought with the bitter feelings of her forced charade in her mind. Wanting nothing more than to reveal herself to him, Ruri wouldn't risk speaking. She feared her emotions would give her away. Instead she simply nodded and guiltily draped an arm around Akito's shoulder. 'He'll think I'm doing it for support.'  
  
Remembering what Inez told him upon there meeting, "I guess you can't talk much so can you point me in the right direction?" Akito asked. He felt a bit awkward with another man holding him like Nakushita was doing but he wouldn't comment.  
  
Hobbling along while leaning heavily against Akito, Ruri pointed the way towards her shared domicile. She was reveling in the slight smell her mask allowed her to partake in as they walked. She listened to Akito inform her of all the small things about the Nadesico that she already knew, but wasn't suppose to.  
  
"Can you tell me how it happened?" Akito asked suddenly.  
  
Rocked from her sudden comfort induced drowsiness, Ruri pointed to her throat and shook her head no.  
  
Akito nodded in understanding. "It must be hard on you. Those Jovians took so much from us all. Its not fair."  
  
Looking at the pain on Akito's face through her darkened visor, Ruri could feel the hurt radiating from him. It sickened her. Here she was alive and well, while the fact that Akito didn't know it was causing him such pain. What hurt worse was she felt the same way he did. Glad the mask shielded her eyes as a few tears streaked down her cheek, she pointed to a door that the pair had just passed.  
  
"Your place?"  
  
Pointing to the sign that indeed indicate that both Inez and Nakushita dwelled within. Ruri felt torn. She adamantly wanted to remain with Akito, but she knew the chances of her breaking down were so great that she shouldn't risk it.  
  
Dislodging himself from the wounded 'man,' Akito stopped and looked directly into the visor, "Can you ever take that off?"  
  
Before she had a chance to think, her body responded by nodded in the affirmative. Elated to see a smile grace Akito's face, Ruri hoped that she didn't just make matters worse.  
  
"Glad to hear it," the man said, with a definite show of joy. "We'll have to do something some time. Maybe use the simulator or something. You know guy stuff," he finished with a grin. Looking at the poor man before him, Akito was slightly glad. He had another guy to hang out with. With all those women about, Akito was hoping that he'd stumble upon somebody who he could relate with.  
  
He didn't really have much in common with the other males aboard the ship. Jun instinctively didn't like him for obvious reasons. The tech crew seemed to have a cliché that didn't involve him, save for Uribataki.  
  
With another wave, Akito left by saying, "Take care Nakushita, hope to see you soon." The door to the room was then sealed leaving Akito to face the nameplate again. Then it struck him like a blow to the stomach. 'Inez Fressange.'  
  
"I know I've heard that name before I meet her the other day," the mused as he continued towards his original goal. Forcing every nuance of memory to work for him, he recalled it and shouted in front of a pair of gossiping women, "Ruri's old boss!"  
  
-----------  
  
Inez was left with the cleaning duty, a fact that irritated her. Folding up the rabbit suit that Yurika had discarded so harshly, Inez began thinking of the punishment that her dear roommate would suffer. She was feeling put off as well by the obvious lie that Mr. Prospector had used to force there filming to a halt.  
  
The end result was still favorable though, using her frequent off camera time, Inez used a few of the security codes that Ruri had told her of to watch those watching the show. "Two sleeping pilots, one confused, a resin figure of Yurika in the suit," she could just feel the blackmail potential for that little fact. She thought of the numerous others she had seen watching her show. 'Build a fan base then hit them with the real information. Nergal won't have a ship of loyal sheep anymore,' Inez fashioned.  
  
Her cleansing ritual was cut short by the sudden eruption coming from the door. One of the boxes she had just stacked had been tipped over by her unknown and noticeably clumsy guest.  
  
"If you're going to do that, you can help clean it up," she doctor addressed the mass of clothing writhing on the floor.  
  
Freeing himself from the tangle of assorted costumes, Akito addressed the only person he could see in the room, "I will if you give me my Gekiganger figure back."  
  
'Gekiganger.so that's where the Captain got it. She stole it from him hoping to draw him here. Clever, very clever of her.' Fressange thought as Akito walked the remaining distance over to her. "So you must be Tenkawa- san. Glad to meet you off the battle field," she said as she extended her hand in friendship.  
  
Accepting her hand, Akito gladly shook it. "That is true, that was some mess. You're Inez Fressange correct?"  
  
Gathering the spilled contents of the boxes Akito knocked over, Inez ordered the male, "Help me pack, we can talk as we finish this."  
  
"But my fig." Akito started to say before Inez cut him off mid statement.  
  
"Our captain took the liberty of holding on to it until she could return it to you," her voice muffled by the slight strain of lifting the box into her arms. Kicking the other box with her left leg, hoping Akito would take the hint and grab it, which he did, she headed out of the 'studio.'  
  
In her mind, Inez was doing flips, something about Akito felt odd. She suspected the feeling of having known him before came from Ruri's recounting of their shared past, but something didn't fit with that. "Akito?"  
  
Easily holding the other box that Inez needed storing, "Yes?" He asked he didn't feel quite ready to ask her about Ruri.  
  
"Do you have the feeling that.never mind," thinking quickly to not offset the balance of the conversation, "you have something on your mind aside from your figure?" She asked while thinking of the other Gekiganger figure she was instructed to give back to Akito eventually.  
  
"Back on Mars, you had an assistant," he spoke slowly and carefully. The words were hard to form; he didn't feel comfortable saying them to this woman. "Her name was Ruri, do you remember what happened to her?"  
  
Her eyes narrowing slightly, but not enough for Akito to notice, Inez was truly worried. Knowing the truth and hiding it were at times hard matters, especially when the feelings of one of her only true friends was at stake. Using a delaying tactic to buy time to make up a believable story, "Light blue hair, yellowish eyes?"  
  
Looking for hidden messages on the top of the box he was carrying, Akito knew that if Ruri, his Ruri, wasn't already on board she was dead. He really didn't want to know the truth, like he didn't want to learn about Santa Claus, but it was something that he needed to know. "How did.she die?"  
  
Soaking in the flow of Akito's rather powerful statement, Inez took a new liking to Akito. He based his observations on fact. 'For his information, if she was in the base she'd have been killed. If she wasn't she died before the attack.' Akito's logic was, despite the fact he was wrong, very sound. "For a man, you have a very fastidious mind."  
  
Blushing ever so slightly at the compliment from the woman that he suddenly realized was very attractive. The slight trace of sweat only heightening her form of her face, and served to make her clothing cling to her body, a very well toned and shapely one. 'Must have had a lot of work on Mars,' he rationalized before he banished the idea from his mind. "Thank you Inez- san."  
  
"Inez is fine. As for my ex-assistant," she didn't miss the flinch that passed after her comment, "She died of a fever after about three months."  
  
Finality crashing down on him, he only hoped for one thing now, "Was she in pain?"  
  
"No, she died peacefully in her sleep. She gave me something to give to you. I can give it to you now if you want. Well once we get to my room." Stopping in her tracks she took notice that it was actually Akito leading her, "You know were my room is?"  
  
"I helped Nakushita back here before I ran into you," Akito admitted.  
  
Wondering how Ruri was taking that little encounter, Inez remained silent until she arrived at her room. "Just put the box down here, Nakushita may be in the middle of cleaning his gear and would take offence if you came in. I'll be right back."  
  
Doing as he was told, Akito slid the box against the metal frame of the hallway and waited for Inez to return. As he waited he pulled something worn with time out from his side holster. "Guess I can give this to Inez.since I can't give it to her now."  
  
Hearing what seemed to be a shout, Akito crew slightly worried, maybe he had caused more trouble than he had thought. Reaching for the door beckon, he took a step back as the door suddenly opened and Inez quickly dashed back through it, his old Gekiganger toy in hand.  
  
"Geki?"  
  
Handing the toy to him, Inez smiled at the honest reaction it resulted in, "She insisted on keeping it clean and in working order." Noticing the letter in Akito's left hand, "What's that?"  
  
With a new reminder of what he lost in his right hand, he slid the old to Inez in with his left, "Right before the attack on Mars, an old friend on Earth sent Ruri and me a box of oranges and a letter a piece. This one is Ruri's. I can never give it to her personally now, so could you take it? It would mean a lot to me. A sense of closure I guess."  
  
'Oranges.oranges.' Inez grasped the letter in her hand and tried to admonish the thought of citrus fruit from her mind. "I'll gladly take it. I'm sorry for your loss."  
  
Holding Geki closer to his chest, Akito nodded, "Thanks. Well I better be off. Tell Nakushita I said hi and I intend to my word and take him to the simulator."  
  
"I'll tell him," she said with a wave, all the while cursing fate for being so cruel on the two.  
  
--------------  
  
From her seat to the right of the captain's podium, Minato was enjoying the drama unfolding on the other side of the bridge. From her viewpoint, only slightly blocked by the shy young computer tech, she could see the green haired pilot and Megumi arguing slightly. Adding fuel to the fire, the possessive captain was also listening, and holding what appeared to be a toy robot.  
  
'Never a dull moment on this ship,' she mused to herself while she saw the girl, Ruri, start playing a computer game.  
  
"What do you mean 'don't try anything' I don't understand ya!" Ryoko shouted.  
  
Shushing the boisterous woman so that hopefully Yurika wouldn't eavesdrop, she was too late however; "I overheard your transmission the other day, calling for Akito."  
  
Not really wanting others to know she had started to develop a soft spot for the spastic but sometimes withdrawn pilot, "I don't understand what your saying."  
  
"Do you two need something to do?" Yurika asked, more to announce that she was listening than to really get them to work.  
  
Both woman swore silently and turned to see Yurika, the sight of Akito's prized possession in her hand did nothing to sooth them. "HOW DID YOU GET THAT?"  
  
Gliding her fingers slowly over the metal figure, "Oh this? Akito-chan let me borrow him for our show." She didn't really think it a lie, she figured if she had asked he'd allow her to use it. Even if they weren't officially seeing each other, the bond between them had to be strong enough for that. 'I hope.'  
  
Neither woman really believed her however. Both knew of the kiss shared between Yurika and Akito, and neither was pleased. Minato was smiling broadly now; things were starting to heat up on the romance front. By her observations, Minato was sure Megumi was betting on her slow and steady approach would gain him Akito's heart. Yurika already figured he was hers and he just needed reminding. Ryoko, now that was something Minato hadn't figured on.  
  
The two non-Martian women continued to glare at the captain who now seemed fit to enter a daydream where she and Akito ran a small restaurant. "What do you think of all this Ruri-Ruri?"  
  
Pausing her game, Ruri looked at Minato, "One, I'm a child and wouldn't understand such things."  
  
"And second?" Minato asked, something about Ruri's attitude was slightly upsetting her about now.  
  
Pointing to Minato's consol, "We're receiving a unidentified transmission feed."  
  
Needless to say social conversation was soon put to a halt while the crew assembled for an unknown turn of events.  
  
----------------  
  
"I don't understand Inez, why is he doing this?" Akito asked as he piloted his mecha back towards the now surrounded Nadesico."  
  
She knew why he was doing it, to save the ship, but she couldn't tell him that. "Maybe he has a plan or something. Either way we better get back to the ship," Inez said to him from the lower part of his cockpit.  
  
The two were still uncertain as to how the events transpired between the Admiral and the bridge crew. They only knew that one moment they were told to clear ice from a clear engine, the next they're ordered back to the Nadesico after the Admiral fired upon it.  
  
Listening over the open com-channel, they pair heard the old man's order to proceed through the chulip. "What makes him think we'll fair any better than the Crocus?" Akito asked as the fear of an icy death began creepy into his mind.  
  
Remembering what Ruri told her about what happened before, this scene wasn't matching. Akito was supposed to know that Admiral was the cause of the accident."She left something out."  
  
Helping Inez out of the Aesti, "Inez who left something out?"  
  
Waving the comment off with her hand, "Nothing, we'll be fine because the distortion field will protect us. Don't worry."  
  
The smile that the blond gave him calmed him down more than her words did. 'If she can be so calm about this, we must be ok.' Letting that belief settle in, he realized it helped him to calm down a lot. "Should we go to the bridge anyway?"  
  
Feeling the ship begin to move towards the chulip, "I don't think we'd make it in time to affect anything, and I could use some tea."  
  
Hoping that Yurika was handling things ok, she always seemed more in control when he wasn't around anyway, he agreed. They listened to the Admiral's farewell speech over the speaker system as they reached the galley. Akito, Inez noted, looked pained when the transmission was so abruptly severed.  
  
"Houmei-san, could I get that tea-service back?" he asked after settling down in a chair across from Inez.  
  
"Glad you mentioned that, he left something in it for you actually," the head chief informed the two. She turned the pot over and a letter clearly addressed to Akito landed on the table with a soft swish.  
  
Unspeaking, Akito wondered what the man could have possible had to tell him that he couldn't have just said. Opening the letter, Akito read the man's confession.  
  
It took Houmei holding him down, and Inez with a syringe of tranquilizer to calm the boy man down. Inez thought the old fool had gotten off easy with how his life was extinguished.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Author notes  
  
Again I apologize for the lateness of this chapter. I'll try to make faster updates. Well the story is making some nice headway and I've got plans for the next few chapters already in mind  
  
Now I'm an assistant manager so.more money, more work, but I've vowed to write a scene of a story a day from now on and that really helps with flow, ideas, and output.  
  
Well hoped you liked it, hope you review it.hope you read my other work too  
  
Ja Mata  
  
Zentrodie 


	12. Coming Together

Standard Disclaimer!  
  
Wow, been to long since I last updated this story. I've been meaning to for a while but, well to be honest didn't think I could concentrate enough on the task at hand as I was panicking about projects and such. Sorry. Hope you think the wait was worth it and continue to read/enjoy my rendition of Nadesico.  
  
--------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Anata no Ichiban Ni Naritai Chapter 12 – Coming Together  
  
Two days into the dark twirling vortex that was the boson tunnel, Ruri received a letter from her captain. After reading Akito's letter from Kyoko, Ruri wasn't in the state of mind to do anything let alone what Yurika had just asked her to do. Lying on her bed with the letter in hand she just stared out into space.  
  
"You'll put a hole in the hull if you keep that up," Inez said trying to get her sullen friend to smile. Slowly beginning to worry about the mental state of her young ward, Inez couldn't help but wonder what the letter Akito had so meticulously cared for and delivered only a few days ago. 'Ever since she's read it she became this zombie.'  
  
Her voice again reminiscent of her deadpan self responded with a simple sorry as she turned her head back to the letter. 'Why couldn't things have been different? Why did this whole thing have to happen?' She would have continued to curse fate for her troubles had Inez not ripped the letter away from her.  
  
'I'm tired of this. She needs help and only I can do that right now.' Going over the well-written lines of text, Inez came to the conclusion that Ruri was taking things better than she would have anticipated. Taking a moment to look at Ruri, Inez found that the blue haired woman had yet to move from her position. Taking a seat herself next to Ruri, Inez read the letter again in earnest.  
  
' Dear Ruri-chan,  
  
Things on Earth are wonderful, I'm so glad you suggested it. I am upset however, with you. I shouldn't have to write to Miss Hoshino anymore should I? I've seen you and Akito-chan grow up together and I know you'll make each other very happy. You may not know it but I do, Akito loves you deeply, just like you feel for him. Akito is very important to me, he became a son to me and I want him to be happy, and he will be with you. Stop fighting with yourself and listen to your heart. Tell him!  
  
Well I better stop prattling on about this. And Ruri, I would love to have you 'in the family.' Hope you two are happy together and well this is selfish but we wouldn't mind being grandparents.  
  
Love hopefully your soon to be mother-in-law Kyoko Takeshi'  
  
Folding the letter in half and placing it on the nightstand by Ruri's bed, Inez reached out and hugged the poor girl. That letter symbolically ripped her heart into pieces. 'A weaker person would have exposed themselves to their love by now. Yet she hasn't.'  
  
Breaking down in Inez's arms, Ruri cried again. She was ashamed of herself for it, but it was comforting to say the less. After a few minutes they separated and Ruri smiled a tiny bit as she looked at Inez. "Thanks I needed that."  
  
Waving off the thanks, Inez focused a little bit more now that Ruri wasn't so withdrawn. "Glad you're feeling better. Back to business, how long are we to be in this thing?" Her hands gestured to the simulated window showing the utter blackness surrounding them.  
  
Wiping the last of her tears away, Ruri climbed over to the side of her bed and took a sitting position. Thinking back all those years, she found it hard to come up with an actual figure; it was hazy in her mind. "Honestly I can't tell you. I think we have another two weeks in this tunnel then we all blank out. Outside of the Nadesico however I think three months pass by."  
  
Accepting Ruri's answer, Inez went to the next important issue, "What did the captain have to give you?" Frankly the captain of the Nadesico puzzled the blond doctor. 'She's flighty and air-headed one minute then totally focused the next. And when she IS air-headed it seems a ploy, she is truly something else.'  
  
Worry showed its face in Ruri's expression. "She wants Akito to train 'Nakushita' how to pilot an Aestivalis." Ruri fully expected Inez to understand the implications of such a request. She didn't know if Yurika would accept disobedience from her or what would result if she did learn to pilot.  
  
"So she wants a replacement I bet," Standing and walking over to Ruri's helmet and taking the heavy mass of plastic in her hands. Tossing the item of concealment over to her protégé, "She is a very conniving woman isn't she."  
  
Again finding herself lost by Inez's logic, Ruri needed clarification. 'Inez is a genius in the truest sense. I can never follow her way of thinking.' Running her hand over the smooth surface of the mask, her only means of leaving her accursed room. "What do you mean?"  
  
With a small smirk Inez went into her explanation. "Think about it. Why stress having Akito train you and not one of the more experienced female pilots? The answer is by having the two 'guys' together he won't be able to train with the other women, and he won't have time to be followed by Megumi."  
  
Ruri nodded Inez had a point, the other pilots could have, if she were to be trained, do a better job of instructing her. Yurika was using Nakushita as a way of keeping the other girls from latching their claws into Akito. It was a well-planned ruse that wouldn't even seem out of the ordinary unless analyzed.  
  
Ruri would have stopped needing an explanation at that point but Inez continued. "And once Nakushita is on par or better than Akito, Yurika pulls him from the flight roster. She'll start out by saying you need practical experience or that with only four Aestivalis their needs to be rotation. But he'll never be put back on, but no it doesn't stop there he'll stay on board as a cook. Eventually he'll be her 'private' cook."  
  
"That can't happen though! The time-line...he has to pilot!" panic searing into her mind at the concept of non-existence. Ruri took Yurika's letter in hand and was fully intent on ripping it into shreds before Inez stopped her.  
  
"I know it's a risk, but you can use this to your advantage. If you never get good enough to replace him, you can spend time with him." Inez knew the risk of even that much contact with Akito, but she also knew that the inability to even talk to Akito was killing Ruri.  
  
Donning her helmet, Ruri smiled, "You know what. It's been to long since Akito and I last had a chance to play a game together." Her voice didn't depict her inner emotions however. Doubt, fear, love, and even lust entered her mind. 'Can I be trusted to do this and not let Akito know I'm me?' Her body was already moving to the bridge to tell Yurika that 'he' would accept, the doubt was pushed back deep into her mind. She simply couldn't pass up the chance.  
  
-------------  
  
Wanting to collect his thoughts and calm down after his 'incident' in the mess hall, Akito had taken to his room. Mentally a wreck from the stress of the Nadesico's situation and the steadily growing attempts by both Megumi and Yurika to gain his favor, he really needed the two days away from everything.  
  
But with all things, it had to come to and end as his door chimed. Turning off this remote controlled Gekiganger, which he didn't have out of his sight since he reclaimed it, he strode over to the door. Once opened, he found Yurika looking nervously into his room.  
  
Having not liked angering Akito the last time she used her master key to gain entrance, Yurika had patiently waited for him. His absence the past few days had taken its toll on her as well. After he had re-entered her life, not having him around or knowing how he was doing was abstract torture to the highly intelligent woman. "Akito, are you feeling better?"  
  
'So they told her about my outbreak, guess she does need to know. She is the captain after all.' His lips turned upwards slightly as he stepped aside allowing her to enter, which she happily did. "Yeah, I'm better now. Thanks for not making me report in or anything." Shutting the door behind them, the pair entered Akito's small and darkened room.  
  
Allowing her fantasies to overtake her for a moment, Yurika envisioned Akito wrapping his arms around her in the darkened room. A few fresh tears trickling down his face as he turned her around, he'd say something about missing her all these years and then...the light turned on and her face turned a faint shade of pink. "Anything for you Akito," her voice chipper but Akito almost believed that she did mean 'anything.'  
  
Sitting down on his bed, Akito looked into Yurika's deep blue eyes, "Guess I was a little out of it after finding out about the Admiral. Sorry if I missed anything." As Yurika sat right next to him, her legs brushing up against his own he wondered briefly why she was there.  
  
Reveling in knowing Akito didn't shrink away from her close proximity, Yurika was tempted to put her arm around the man she loved in a consolation move. 'That would be to fast, Akito was really hurt on Mars. I was a fool to think he hadn't known anybody before finding me again. Even I had a thought about men in passing.' She knew that the others weren't Akito however, and that he was the only love in her life. "You didn't miss anything. I just wanted to check on you and make sure their wasn't anything I could do to help, and if I could make a small request."  
  
'If she asks me to kiss her again I'll scream,' Akito thought as the adjusted position much to Yurika's chagrin to face her better. "Like I said, I'm better now," at the dazzling smile Yurika bestowed upon him after his comment he found himself matching it. "So what do you want to request captain?" He had a little playfulness in his tone that did much to offset Yurika's mental state.  
  
'Does he know how he affects me? It's hard to believe that he does but...but my damn need to act vacant in front of the crew must give the impression that I'm normally this open.' Cursing the path she had chosen to keep the crews moral high, she turned back to path. "Could you train Nakushita to pilot an Aestivalis? I can get Uribataki to set up some simulators for the two of you if you want to."  
  
Thinking that some exercise would do him some good and he did say he wanted to spend more time with the unfortunate man, Akito nodded. "You know what, I'll do it. That is if he wants to."  
  
Feeling a great weight leave her shoulders Yurika wanted to scream out in victory. 'He'll be away from those harpies, Megumi won't be able to snatch at him, and soon, soon he won't have to risk his life.' Getting up from her bed and heading to the door, Yurika turned one last time to look at her truest love, "He agreed earlier today to it. Starting tomorrow you will training our newest Aestivalis pilot."  
  
-------------  
  
Rushing to the bridge to 'discus' the alteration of the training regimen, Ryoko was very pissed off. To the uniformed she seemed upset that her squad was to be receiving a new member without her involvement, to the informed however she was upset that she was to lose 'temporarily' a certain member. "Where the hell is that nut-bar captain?"  
  
From her position at the helm, Minato was laughing inside. 'This ship is always so full of entertainment. Megumi's upset because Akito's been holed up for the last few days, and now that Yurika has made Nakushita a pilot, Ryoko's upset. Ah to be young and in love.'  
  
Now Minato knew she wasn't that much older than them, but she didn't really see Akito for anything overly special. Sure he saved them and was energetic, but she liked her men a little older. But that didn't mean she couldn't enjoy what she was watching now.  
  
Having grown tired of listening to the static over the comm. system, Megumi had taken to reading to pass her time. Looking up from a rather passionate novel and over to the green haired tomboy, "Yurika went to tell Akito about his current assignment."  
  
"You mean she hasn't told him yet? That flier seemed to be have been made ages ago!" Ryoko's voice growing in decibels. Storming over to Megumi's station, she stopped briefly to pat Ruri's head as she walked by. An event that happened more often than the child would have liked.  
  
'All but Tenkawa-kun look down on me for my age. Why must they judge me based on my stature?' the small girl thought as she reconnected to Omaikane and an escape from the world of 'adults.'  
  
Agreeing with Ryoko that Yurika seemed overly confident that Akito would bend to her will wasn't something to be happy about. Neither of them openly stated Akito was the source of their agitation but it was easy to see. "I don't know what she's thinking about with this. We don't even have enough Aesti's for another pilot," Megumi's head dropping in thought.  
  
Ryoko took Megumi's question to heart. 'If we get another pilot, she might want to...' Her thoughts stopped, "We'll probably get another suit once we get back to Earth space." She dismissed the thought that Yurika would endanger the ship by taking Akito away from active duty. 'She can't be that crafty.'  
  
Of handedly Megumi let out a languished, "I wonder how Akito is doing."  
  
"That dork, I bet he's fine. Just wants people to worry about him that's all." The words sounded hollow in her opinion but she couldn't possibly like him, there was no way she could. Absolutely none, she kept telling herself.  
  
From her place across the room Minato recounted Akito's little bout of hysteria, "He did cry out that 'That bastard killed her,' though. Wonder who he was talking about."  
  
Both women did wonder exactly who Akito was referring to. Megumi had her suspicions that from her earlier talks with Akito that he had lost someone very close but never knew the circumstances. Ryoko's thoughts were similar to Megumi's but without the prior knowledge of her lance mate.  
  
A silence lulled over the bridge, only Ruri who had partially been listening to the conversation spoke, "Bakas."  
  
----------  
  
With no other reason left to stay hidden in his quarters, Akito returned to his duties aboard the Nadesico. Houmei wasn't at all upset with him for not showing up for his previous shifts. She had been witness to what caused it. After a little cook-party things carried on as if he hadn't been gone from this post.  
  
Megumi was another matter for Akito to deal with. Before he had gone into his seclusion, the two of them would talk a little in the mess hall or on the observation deck, but now Megumi was actively seeking him out. Usually after he'd return from teaching Nakushita how to pilot, he'd find Megumi standing outside his door. Megumi would take him to the VR room and while he didn't always agree with what simulation she picked out, he found that he really enjoying the girls company.  
  
Dealing with Yurika was slowly driving Akito insane. With her master key in tow, Akito was starting to think that his warning about knocking was going to be ignored. After the seclusion ended, Yurika often found it necessary to 'check up on' her crew. Akito doubted she'd ever checked on the rest of the Nadesico's crew. The saving grace for Yurika was that Akito just couldn't stay mad at her. Her overflowing emotions would stem his temper and make him forget why he was upset in the first place.  
  
Unknown to Akito, both Megumi and Yurika weren't happy with just the small bouts of time with him. They wanted, needed more from him and when they saw the other leaving with him or going to see him, anger and bitterness began to enter them. Akito wasn't blind to their feelings, but he was too afraid to try something. Memories of his Ruri kept entering his mind whenever he contemplated trying a relationship with either woman.  
  
His mantra for 'putting the girls off' was simple. "I just can't help but be afraid. Everybody that gets close to me dies. If it were to happen again I don't know what I'd do."  
  
-------------  
  
According to Ruri's estimate, they crew had one more day left in the tunnel before they arrived on the outside. Re-adjusting her helmet, she walked into the training room and found Akito already there. Waving to him as she often did, she climbed into her simulated cockpit.  
  
Grinning at his now combat buddy, Akito opened a comm. channel to Nakushita's pod. "I think your ready for a combat exercise. I don't really have anything else to teach you, the rest you get with experience."  
  
Fighting the growing urge to rip off her disguise, Ruri nodded. "Don't expect me to go easy on you sensei." Her hands gripping the stirrups of the simulator as the internal light dimmed and was replaced with a mountain landscape.  
  
True to form, neither combatant was slacking. Akito was thrilled to have some male bonding, because it helped to keep his mind off of the past and his current romantic problems. Discharging his rifle at his opponent, he marveled at how quickly Nakushita picked up the controls.  
  
Reminded of her times battling Akito in their tiny Martian apartment, Ruri could still read Akito like a book. She'd easily learned the controls of the mecha, but it wasn't her skill that gave her an advantage, it was that she truly knew her opponent. 'I could finish this now but I don't want to, I want more time with him.'  
  
Her training meetings with Akito were a blessing. She was honestly surprised that Inez hadn't forbid her from doing them, 'She must trust me a lot I guess.' Just being in his presence filled her with nostalgia. She remembered all his faults and perks. She remembered why she had her crush on him on the Nadesico and how she fell in love with him on Mars.  
  
Falling back into her memories, Ruri forgot one thing. Akito remembered Ruri's playing style much as she had remembered his. So as he battled against Nakushita, his memory tried to recall exactly why he could remember the moves, how he could predict what was going to happen next. Then it hit him metaphysically like a ton of bricks. "Ruri."  
  
An avalanche of memories that he'd tried to repress again came flooding to the surface. The confession by the admiral did much to resurface them again but the battle did the rest. He wasn't even aware that Nakushita had just speared his simulation Aestivalis and claimed victory. Akito was only aware of the pain in his chest and the salty tears tracing his face.  
  
Ruri had noticed Akito's drop in performance as she won and became worried. Rushing over to his pod, Ruri found Akito with his legs drawn tightly against his chest and his head buried in them. Again grateful for the voice modifier, "Tenkawa-san is something wrong?"  
  
Shaken by the ruff voice, "Oh, oh sorry just. Bad memories I guess." Akito tried to push the feelings down again but failed as Nakushita pulled him out of the simulator and over to a set of viewing chairs that Yurika had added in case of spectators. "You fight a lot like somebody I used to...to know."  
  
Without a moments hesitation Ruri responded, "Maybe it would do you good to speak about it. Get those feelings out." Only after she had spoke did she think that having him do just that might not be the best thing. 'Can I handle what he would say if he does?'  
  
Much to Ruri's dismay, Akito actually did think it would help. Nakushita was a man; maybe he has some advice for me. "Before the attack on Mars. I was living with a girl. She wasn't just a girl I guess. I loved her."  
  
Heart pounding in her ears, Ruri never expected Akito to have mirrored her feelings. Sure they kissed that one time but she had initiated it. Her throat finding words hard to pronounce, "Go on."  
  
Looking blankly into his hands, "I never told her my feelings. Things were confusing in the end and I don't know how she really felt but it just ended. The Jovian's attacked and she was killed. After my parents died when I was a child she was there for me, and I just let her die without a word of thanks, appreciation, or love."  
  
Ruri was to stunned to talk. All her hopes and dreams were real, but out of her grasp. Unable to find the ability to speak she just put her arm around his shoulder and cursed the heavy suit she wore that stole all sense of feeling. After a short time Akito apologized for being selfish and bothering Nakushita and left Ruri.  
  
Watching from the security cameras, Yurika had witnessed the whole thing. Her own tears falling as she soaking in all of Akito's pain. Rushing to his room from her post, much to Jun's confusion, Yurika went right into Akito's room without prompting again. "Akito? Akito are you hear?"  
  
The darkness and silence that answered Yurika's question wasn't much to deter her. "Akito please talk to me. I'm sorry but I was listening to you talk to Nakushita."  
  
A sad broken voice was heard from Akito's bed, "You, you heard me?" Akito didn't want anybody to know of his pain. It was selfish of him to put his pain on so many others who had pain of their own.  
  
Using his voice as a beckon, the captain found and enfolded her arms around the source. Hugging Akito tightly she let her own feelings out as she felt his arms wrap around her. Feeling a few straggling tears on her uniform she shushed Akito as he tried to talk. 'I'll be here for you Akito. I'll help you forget her. I love you and in time you'll love me again.'  
  
In the darkness of the room, Yurika kissed Akito again after his tears subsided. She kissed him deeper than back in the washroom. Emotionally drained, Akito just reveled in the soft texture of his childhood friend's lips against his. Before Yurika could deepen her kiss, Akito pushed her gently away. "Thank you Yurika. Thank you."  
  
She could feel him smiling at her and replied, "Anything for you Akito." A few more moments of silence passed before a call from the bridge caused Yurika to leave.  
  
-----------------  
  
The next day Akito met with Nakushita for his training and was in greatly improved spirits. Akito apologized again for any troubles he caused Nakushita with his breakdown. Akito was relieved when the usually silent man nodded and said it wasn't a problem.  
  
Other events on the Nadesico happened normally until suddenly all was black. Ruri was the first to recover and called the other crew members out of their slumber. She wouldn't have minded them sleeping, but a battle was going on around them and she couldn't handle the ship alone.  
  
Finding the captain, Akito, and Inez in the recroom was a surprise, finding Akito and Inez holding hands and almost snuggling was a greater shock, but that was one Yurika put a stop too.  
  
As the trio rushed to their respective places, nobody noticed a shorthaired blue haired woman rushing out of the room after the others left. The elder Ruri was terrified, 'this didn't happen before! Why did I end up there this time? What's happened to me?'  
  
Nobody answered her question as the crew was to involved with the impromptu battle.  
  
--------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Author notes  
  
Again I apologize for the lateness of this chapter. I hope you don't think I'm making Yurika to bold. I still think if she had reason, say Akito having a crisis, she'd try to help him and well forward her relationship with him.  
  
Its your opinion if you agree with me or not though. Hope you liked it and will review my chapter. Sorry for any grammar mistakes, I try to catch them all and grammar check does help a lot but can't get them all. 


	13. Discovering Changes

Standard Disclaimer

I bet you never thought you'd see this. That's right I'm back to writing this story. For those of you that doubted me, I direct you attention to the author notes of the last chapter. I had to really complex stories going on at one time and I didn't think working on both at the same time would have given me the desired affect for either.

So now that the other story has concluded I'm back! Hope my hiatus hasn't pissed you off to much and I hope you bear with me as I'm sure I'm a little rusty with this. I'll do my best to make it interesting for you.

-Section Divider-

Anata No Ichiban Ni Naritai

Chapter 13 Signs of Change

The sudden appearance of the Nadesico into the battle sent many of the fleet commanders into a panic. Thoughts that the Jovians had a newer larger weapon than they anticipated almost created a route, but at the signal that it was the Nadesico a rallying cheer was let up. Three months after its disappearance the ship of fools had made its return.

Not yet confident in Nakushita's piloting ability, Yurika was forced to order Akito out into the fray. Ryoko, Izumi, and Hikaru were all itching for some combat after the long hours in the simulators, but Akito wasn't quite as zealous. Taking a deep breath, Akito willed his Aestivalis into the darkness of space highlighted by explosions.

Hikaru zipped past the part-time cook as a cluster of grasshoppers appeared in perfect formation for a quick burst of gunfire. Letting her gun spray the machines as she flew past them a sudden realization was made. "Hey! I only got three out of ten! They have better shields than we do!"

Never one to let a problem keep her down, Ryoko charged the nearest opponent and clubbed it with the end of her rifle. "Yeah but they sure can't stand a physical attack. Pisses me off thought, thought we had the newest Aesti's in the fleet!" Dodging a volley of fire from another would be killer, Ryoko's eyes fixed on her lance mate. "Tenkawa do something! Don't just float there!"

It was Izumi that first saw the incoming missile flying towards Akito, she tried calling out to him, but her sudden burst of seriousness was lost on all who heard her. In his cockpit Akito was prone. Old fears brought to the surface over the past few days paralyzed his body. 'Why…why can't I move now? I was better before but now…now…' He saw the approaching death but still couldn't get his body to react. Luckily for him another unknown Aestivalis appeared and shoved him out of the way.

"Damn it kid you'll die if you keep this up," the voice, not that of an older man but something in the tone spoke of age rang over Akito's speakers. A few seconds later Nagare Akatsuki made his first appearance to the crew of the Nadesico. "You three get out of here now! We'll take care of this." Hooking Akito's Aesti with his own, Akatsuki fired a volley into the approaching swarm and then flew off towards the Nadesico as the Cosmos discharged its gravity blast cannon.

Before Ryoko could respond the energy beams jutted past her and her other lance mates. 'I guess Tenkawa is safe with that guy.' But she couldn't deny that something happened to him. The look of raw panic on his face as he locked up was etched into her mind, and not just her own mind but also that of Yurika, Megumi, and Ruri. Whatever was happening they were going to all learn together.

-Section Divider-

As the Aestivalis crew made their way back to the hanger, a heated discussion was occurring on the bridge. Due to her sudden awaking, Yurika made a hasty discussion that wasn't in the United Forces best interest. Her firing of the Nadesico's cannon did severe damage to the United Forces fleet. Something they and to a lesser extent Nergal weren't too happy about.

"Captain, had you been on the bridge this wouldn't have happened," Goat said sternly to the worried captain. With the immediate threat gone, the bridge crew started to take stock in the oddity that had occurred. Many had known Yurika was on the bridge as they blacked out so how she got to the recreation room was a mystery.

With Akito's pleas for help still fresh in her mind, Yurika didn't care what the large man said. Her heart wasn't in the bridge it was in the hanger bay. "I don't know how I got there honestly." Nobody noticed how Prospector stepped off the bridge momentarily.

Angry at the Captain for sneaking off to be with Akito, Megumi felt Yurika needed to be punished. "Had Inez not been there I'm sure you would have…" A pair of voices off to Megumi's side cut into her dialogue, and caused a hefty blush to form on her cheeks. 'Did I just accuse her of…?'

"She would have what Megumi?" Minako said with a healthy smile that said she knew what Megumi was thinking, while Ruri asked in genuine. The absence of Inez from the bridge did a lot to add to the discussion of what exactly happened while the crew was asleep, neither Megumi nor Yurika knew what it was but they weren't happy. Megumi blamed Yurika and Yurika blamed Inez for something.

As Yurika was about to scold Megumi for insinuating she would force Akito into anything, Prospector reappeared at her side and called out to her. "I didn't do anything to him alright!" the Captain hollered at the man without waiting to know what he wanted. A full body blush soon spread over her body as she realized she had lost control. Mr. Prospector soon led Yurika to the communications room for a call from the higher ups at Nergal.

-Section Divider-

Ruri was panicking in her shared domicile as Inez walked in dabbing the sleep from her eyes. Inez didn't know either why she had awakened in the recreation room, the only thing she knew was her hand felt warm, and a warm feeling spread in her heart. 'What the hell happened?' the blond thought as Ruri shut the door and hurriedly lead her to a chair. "What is it Ruri? I know we can't be in any real danger because you've have told me."

True Ruri wasn't worried about the battle or Akito's mindset she knew it would work out for the best. That is unless time had changed him too much a part of her mind kept reminding her. What was bothering Ruri was simple, "Something's happened to me Inez! I…I woke up in the rec room with you three. That didn't happen before."

Inez realized Ruri's concern was for what had happened to her, but with limited resources she couldn't accurately deduce what was the cause. Opting to calm her ward, "Ruri, does this change who you are? Will it really make a difference right now what caused it?" Sure it was somewhat cold of Inez to question Ruri this way, but the past had happened and it couldn't be changed. 'She wasn't seen so it shouldn't affect things here.'

"I guess it doesn't matter that much, it just scared me is all," Ruri said truthfully. The fact that it happened hadn't been what scared her; the not knowing was what it was. Her memories of the past were hazy but she knew so much of what to hopefully expect that when the newness of her encounter hit her, it startled her. "Sorry, I'm better now," taking a few calming breathes Ruri started gathering her gear, "What do we do now?"

Pulling up a vidscreen, Inez started doing calculations. "I get ready for the debriefing about the recent change in scenery while you head to the hanger bay to see how our pilots fared." Inez could sense the smile on Ruri's lips without having to look at her. Just as Ruri reached for the door, Inez called out to her, "It appears your memory is a bit lax in points Ruri."

Pushing her helmet down further to give her a better view, Ruri walked back over to Inez and her calculations. "What do you mean Inez?" The vagueness of Inez's statements often left Ruri wondering what the blond genius meant.

Showing Ruri the date and some of her pre-calculations, "The Nadesico was gone for eight months not three. Its been a few years for you so I guess we can't trust everything you say as divine doctrine," the joke failed to calm either woman. Inez trusted Ruri's recollection of the past so much that she at times would alter her plans based on it, but now they both realized that not every detail would be correct. "No matter things still seem to be as you said. Nergal has made peace with the U.F. so the Nadesico will behave as we thought."

With yet another blow to her sense of security, Ruri tapped her seals in insure they were secure and headed to the hanger bay, where Nagare was making a dramatic entrance to people who didn't care who he was, or even truly know who. The only thing that most of the pilots knew was that they'd have newer Aestivalis soon.

-Section Divider-

With the alert downgraded to yellow, Akito headed to his room to relax and hopefully come to terms with what had just happened to him. Nakushita had arrived at the bay just as he was leaving and did his best to reassure him that things would get better. Akito nodded at the man's logic and asked if he'd like to have a little spare later if things went well. Nakushita said he wouldn't mind, and went further into the hanger to see the man who saved Akito's life.

'Akatsuki,' Akito thought, 'He's a different type of guy isn't he.' While Akito didn't know Akatsuki for long, the way the man introduced himself and how skillfully he made his way over to the female pilots, Akito was pretty sure he knew what to make of him. 'He's a playboy type I bet.' It didn't upset Akito to know that, he wasn't looking for any significant other right now anyway. Pulling the disk of Gekiganger out of the mass of them that had the episode he was on, Akito reclined against his wall for a good dose of anime and thought.

That was what he had thought he would do, but a snicker from the door caught his attention. 'I could have sworn I locked that door,' Akito pondered as he tried to adjust his eyes to the dim light of his room to identify his guest. It couldn't be Yurika, as sounds from the bridge were she was in a meeting with Nergal. Megumi was busy with Minato preparing the Nadesico to dock with the newly identified sister ship to the Nadesico the Cosmos. As the red of the uniform filled his vision Akito knew his guest, "Hello Akatsuki, something I can help you with?"

Smirking at the kiddy show on the wall, Nagare couldn't figure Akito out. The other pilots claimed he was very skilled for how green he was to piloting, but the show he saw earlier had him pegged differently. "With all this anime you watch, I'd figure you were a better pilot," the man said simply.

Akito's head bouncing softly, "I guess I'm just not really cut out for it. I'll do my best though." He hoped he'd get another chance to try though. With Nakushita's skill and Akito's panicking it wouldn't be a surprise if they replaced him. 'What good could I do if I panic again?'

Walking further into Akito's room, Nagare wasn't about to let Akito off that easily. He had hoped for a challenge in the man. 'Its just no fun to get everything without a fight,' he smiled to himself. "What's with the defeatist attitude? I wonder if you were any good at all or if those girls were just lying to protect your sorry ass." Having watched the Nadesico's visual feed of the battles, Akatsuki knew that wasn't the case, but to get Akito's spark to flare sometimes you have to apply fire.

Having his own name tarnished was fine, Akito didn't mind what people thought of him. Hearing this man making claims about his fellow pilots though wasn't something he'd stand for. Getting off his feet, the sudden pain of standing, Akito could feel anger brewing in is chest. "I didn't want to be a pilot but I did the best I could. Ryoko and the others did too. Now I don't have to stand here and listen to you say that we lied!"

'Now there is the fighter that I saw in those videos,' Akatsuki smiled to himself. "Well then I hope you'll show me how good of a pilot you are come next battle. Hate to know all your talk is just a show," doing his best to intimidate Akito, Nagare was almost proud of the fry cook as they now stood nose to nose. "Will you show me?"

His momentary feeling of inadequacy and low self-esteem vanished as he bore his gaze into Akatsuki's face. "I'll be there if you are," a moment was shared between the two men. At that moment they knew they could never truly be friends, but they respected the other at that moment. 'I'll show that windbag I'm not just full of hot air,' Akito thought as Nagare turned and left his room.

Stepping around the two women at Akito's door, Akatsuki's outlook for Akito had already been drastically changed for the better. 'Kid has guts, I'll give him that.' Before Akito could settle back down for another attempt at relaxing Megumi and Yurika started bickering about who was there first and his door opened again as the mentally sparing women headed into his room to try and cheer him up.

-Section Divider-

The essential crewmembers had gathered on the bridge as Inez announced that she was going to hold a debriefing. Gathering in the bridge, the assembled flanked Inez on both sides, the pilots on the left and the bridge crew on the right, Nakushita was standing on Akito's left, Ryoko his right. Inez began her explanation. "If you haven't been informed of it yet, eight months have passed since we left Mars. During that time Nergal and the United Forces have come to terms and Nergal has again started making ships for the military."

With his wealth of information, Prospector cut in before Inez told the crew to much information. "Thank you Miss Fressange, but all this means is that the Nadesico will be drafted into the far east defense division of Earth until a better assignment is given to us. With ships like the Cosmos the U.F. has already reclaimed the moon."

Seeing the hurt in Akito's eyes, Megumi spoke up, "What about Mars, we'll be going back to reclaim it too right?" She personally didn't care about reclaiming Mars, but if it helped Akito she was all for it. Also if by saying this she helped herself TO Akito she was for it as well. Nakushita just shook his head softly Ruri already knew that the request was to be denied.

Prospector swiftly made true the adult Ruri's belief, "We have no hope at this time of recovering Mars. Our defense of Earth and its satellites comes first." Pushing his glasses up further on his nose, the man known as Prospector hoped the discussion of the matter was closed.

Minato wasn't taking the news very well however. "So what? Were just common soldiers now? I didn't sign on here to just follow the militaries beck and call." Minato had enough of the world of men in her secretary job. Seeing men fighting men in a game of 'I'm better than you,' wasn't something she wanted to see again.

In a show that set the crews opinion of him, Nagare took Minato's hand and tried to tell his beliefs on the matter. The woman quickly liberated her hand from the man, and later commented on the sickening feeling it gave her. Nobody truly believed Nagare's claim that they would be free to act as they wanted. Being in the military meant you had to follow orders, and that was something the Nadesico had been created to not do. Further discussion was cut short as Ruri sounded the alarm they were under attack again.

-Section Divider-

Through her visor, Ruri could only watch with admiration and regret as Yurika and Megumi left the Nadesico for the Cosmos. 'They get to go to him and save him while I'm stuck here watching, knowing.' The battle had been thankfully brief for the Aestivalis crew, but it wasn't without a loss.

During the battle, Akito had shown signs of improvement from his previous battle only to have his Aestivalis knocked out of the Nadesico's power range by a grasshopper that went out of control. The two other women left when they heard that on emergency power Akito would only live for four hours. With the Nadesico being refitted the ship couldn't leave, which left only single person craft.

Ryoko said she'd go out and 'pick up that idiot' but Inez reminded her that if Akito's Aestivalis was out of the power range, so would hers. So the green-haired tomboy sat in the artificial green room and waited for news. Ruri would have went with the other two, but Inez was strict, 'they went alone last time, you can't go this time.' It didn't make matters easier for her to accept though. Her fingers running along the smooth folds of the letter in her pocket, Ruri prayed that she hadn't affected Akito to the point where he was now dead.

Clad in her pilot suit, Yurika was giving Akatsuki her confirmation that she wasn't the type of captain to abandon her crew. Her eyes turned to the other prepped fighter, "Megumi you shouldn't be here. You don't have the proper training for this sort of mission."

Having her reservations about whether Yurika was certified for combat flying Megumi wasn't going to listen. "I've had a pilots license long before I joined the crew of the Nadesico, and I don't think its appropriate for the captain to put her life on the line." Her last statement was shared by the bulk of the Nadesico and of the U.F. for that matter.

Yurika knew she was breaking protocol by even donning the flight suit, but she couldn't just watch anymore. 'I have to go to him, he's having such trouble and I should be there for him!' It pained Yurika to see Akito hurt or troubled. Seeing his Aestivalis vanish into the darkness of space, Yurika's heart nearly crumbled. The few kisses they shared, the time they spent talking, and just seeing him were all cherished memories of the captain now. "I'm going to get him and bring him back," was all the answer Yurika gave as she fired her thrusters and flew off towards Akito's last known location.

-Section Divider-

Fate had a nasty way of playing with people's lives. Ten minutes ago, Akito was weighing his life for what he thought it was worth. Alone and drifting in space, his chances of survival in his eyes were nil. The good thing was that he thought in death he'd be reunited with Ruri in the after life. But in the off chance he survived he also thought about what he'd do if he returned.

'I can't keep running from Megumi and Yurika. I have to take a stance with them because I don't want to hurt them.' Akito was planning on politely yet firmly telling each girl that he was flattered that they cared for him, but he wasn't ready for a relationship. 'Whether the listen to me is another matter though,' he had thought with a smile.

Yurika had the habit of not listening to what she didn't want to hear, and Megumi was possessive to the extreme. Both girls were special to him, and he cared deeply for them both, but opening his heart to love one of them was too painful a thought to bear at the moment. His thoughts were interrupted when he saw two scout fighters being assaulted by a small group of grasshoppers, so he powered up his Aestivalis and saved his would be saviors.

Now he sat in between the two very girls he was thinking about. 'This is awkward,' the thought ruefully as he looked between the two women. Yurika smiled her warmest at him one moment and glared death at Megumi the next, Megumi acted the same. After the thank you's were out of the way, the trio tried to think of a way out of their predicament.

Using the physics of counter force, Akito started to jettison non-essential parts of his Aestivalis to force the machine back towards the Nadesico. Megumi broke the silence that fell upon them, "You overcame your fear Akito, I'm so proud of you." Her arms wrapped comforting around the young pilot.

Pinching Megumi's hand to make her let go, Yurika followed, "What caused you to do that Akito?" Looking at the smiling face of her dearest, Yurika's voice couldn't hide the joy she felt. Her hand trailed down Akito's back as the man hunched over ever so slightly in thought.

He was tired of being afraid, tired of failing those he loved, and that spurred him onward. "I couldn't stand to see you two in danger. When I saw you under attack I couldn't stop myself." Pushing a few more commands, Akito forced the compartment faster towards home.

Her heart leapt to her throat, "You mean you love drove you to save us?" Megumi couldn't contain her glee. Seeing the dower man force himself to save the ship, save his fellow crewmembers, and yet not even seek for the most remote of respect for it, it tore at the comm. woman. 'He's suffered long enough, I'll help him to recover.'

Yurika was thinking the exact thing. "How do we get back to the ship Akito? The Aestivalis should be able to determine that right?" Her hand rubbing the tense back of Akito soothingly. In her mind Yurika could picture doing this many more times, and with less clothing and with more feeling. 'But now we have to get back, this is all very good but if we die its pointless.'

Running a few tests, Akito learned how they could reach the Nadesico. It wasn't a very good hypothesis but it was the best they could do. One person would reach the Nadesico in twenty minutes, two in thirty, all three would take forty the problem was they only had thirty minutes of air. "One of us has to get off in order to get the other two to the ship. There they can refuel, get another Aestivalis, or something else and come back for the third."

The women took Akito's words as a challenge. Whoever was left behind was the one Akito didn't love. Instantly both women sized the other up for a reason to dump the other. Yurika could pull rank, while Megumi could go for the throat and use emotion. They didn't expect Akito's words. "I'll set the Aestivalis up to fly on autopilot and I'll jump out. You two won't have to do anything to get back. Just try to find me fast ok?"

"NO!" Yurika threw herself on Akito and wrapped her arms around him protectively. "You can't do that, I'd rather we all go than have you out there to possibly die!" Akito could see the tears forming in Yurika's eyes. He hadn't seen anything so beautiful in a long time. The tears looked like crystal as they floated away from her eyes across the cockpit.

Megumi's eyes weren't any better. "I agree with her Akito. If you insist one of us get off, I'll volunteer. I couldn't stand it for you to die because we acted foolishly." Rubbing at the sudden irritation in her nose, Megumi felt Akito's hand brush her cheek. Nuzzling her cheek into his palm, things felt like they were getting better.

Moments later, Akito deployed the emergency sail and the ship, what was left of it started its wayward trip home. With all occupants onboard. They girls questioned him on not having one of them get off, but Akito would have none of it. 'If it's not me getting off, nobody will,' he told them. Megumi and Yurika settled into one of Akito's sides as the fear took hold and they sought comfort.

Postponing his plan to tell the girls his plan till later, Akito just wrapped his arms around the frightened women, he was afraid himself. In silence they drifted towards an unknown fate. Many variations could have affected their course and trajectory and they knew it was a long shot that they'd be rescued. But at that moment it didn't matter. Mumbling into Akito's ear, Megumi opened her heart to him, "I love you Akito."

Hearing Megumi, both Yurika and Akito's eyes widened in surprise. Not to be left behind Yurika played it off as if she didn't hear her but in his other ear, "I love you dearest." Her heart given to Akito during childhood, Yurika was confident in their love. Akito had been getting more responsive to her advances and her love, so Yurika wasn't really to worried about Megumi.

Looking at Akito expectantly, the girls waited his answer. "Girls, about all of this…" Akito's plan to tell them about his reluctance came to his mind in an instant. Forming the words in his mind, Akito was saved from having to tell them as suddenly the intercom turned on.

Various crewmembers stated their desire to know what Akito's plans were for the two women pressed against his sides. Ryoko refrained from commenting, as she still couldn't accept the fact that she liked him. Inez looked at the mask of Nakushita to see his retreating form. Her mind just asked itself, 'is this different than how it was before?'

Over the comm. link, Akito called out to Akatsuki, he challenged the other man with his ideals. 'I'm going to stay here to protect what is important to me! I won't stand ideally by and let danger befall what is precious to me!' The crew was moved slightly. Hikaru thought he sounded like Gekiganger, Ryoko just smiled, and the young Ruri Hoshino smiled softly yet called the man an idiot.

-Section Divider-

After her introduction to the crew, Erina Wong felt confident that the crew would accept her as their leader soon. 'That captain is a total idiot, it's amazing they haven't been all killed yet.' Sure their would be a transitional period where they were intimidated by her, even hated her, but they would fall into line soon enough.

What Erina hadn't expected was to find the chairman of Nergal already on the Nadesico. "You're going to make this difficult for me you know that right?" Erina said as she sat behind the security console away from prying eyes.

"I wouldn't have it any other way," Akatsuki smiled, "so what are we looking at?" His hand slid onto Erina's shoulder. Tempted shake off the man's advances, Erina reminded herself that if she allowed Nagare to think he had control, she could extort him when the time came.

"This is Akito Tenkawa during the trip through the chulip," showing her superior the recording, both smiled when Akito teleported from his room to the recreation room. "This has promise Chairman."

Watching the footage of both Yurika and Inez's sudden appearance next to Akito, Nagare couldn't refute it, it was going to be interesting after all. Then much to there surprise, "Wait, is that a forth person?" Akatsuki asked, as a shorthaired blue woman was seen teleporting into the room a few feet away from the dozing three. "Who is that?" Erina couldn't answer that question, but she was sure to find out.

-End Chapter-

Sorry if its not as good as you'd like but its hard to change gears so suddenly. I'm going to be working almost exclusively on this story until its done, so I'll be back to form in about one or two more chapters.

Hope you enjoyed reading it and are glad to see it back on the updated list.

Ja Mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie-at-secondimpact-dot-com)


	14. The More Things Change

itStandard Disclaimer

Well I'm back but now I have a job, now don't get to happy for me because its not 'the job' but at least now I don't have to worry about starving to death. But having a full time job also means that I don't have all the time I want to write anymore so we'll have to all take this change in writing in stride.

Well I've prattled on long enough lets get to the chapter shall we?

-Section divider-

Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai

Chapter 14 The More Things Change

Yurika wasn't in an overall happy mood as time passed. Ever since the Nadesico returned to Earth it had been one joke after another. But it wasn't the crew of the ship laughing, it was Nergal and the U.F. 'I can't believe they had us risk our lives to save a damn polar bear!' Yurika thought with irritation as her footfalls echoed along the long corridors of the Nadesico's hallways.

The young captain also didn't like her own actions during the polar rescue mission. 'Why isn't Nakushita ready yet! If he was then I wouldn't have panicked and put Akito more at risk.' Rounding the corner and seeing her destination, Akito's room, memories of Akito's sudden disappearance and potential demise filtered across her minds eye. She has been worried for him, she had acted to protect him without thinking, and it put all of them in danger.

'My feelings for him are causing us all trouble, and its not helping me that Megumi still won't give up,' Yurika's eyes narrowed at the thought of the young bridge maiden. Pulling out her master key, Yurika had hoped that by now she wouldn't need to visit Akito at his room, but rather go back to her own and have him waiting for her. 'But she's still trying and with Akito's poor heart what it is, he's afraid of hurting us.' At least that problem on the beach had been rather humorous in Yurika's opinion.

"That girl had no idea what we were capable of once we saw her clutching Akito like that," Yurika mussed to herself as the memory of 'Aqua' replayed itself as the door to the reclusive Aestivalis pilot's room opened. Diving over the shattered awning and wrestling Akito out of that 'crazy woman's', as Akito had said it, grip as Ryoko hovered over all of them pointing her Aesti's gun at Aqua in a sure show of overkill. Chuckling, "She didn't know what she was getting into at all."

But Yurika had to take all the good and bad in stride, she was making progress with Akito regardless of the botched missions and the occasional rival. Finding the common sight of Gekiganger playing on Akito's wall, Yurika smiled her best real smile and rounded the small hallway to see Akito deep in his viewing of the show, so deep that he didn't notice her arriving.

A small but wicked grin grossed her lips as the captain stole quietly across the darkened room to Akito's side. Kneeling down next to him, she blew softly into his right ear and watched in joyful musing as he panicked and flung himself at his wall. "What the hell! Yurika?" Akito all but shrieked as he saw the glowing face of his captain at his side.

How he panicked at such small things, how he'd get agitated when he couldn't help or understand, and just all the good and bad about him, Yurika loved all of it. Her smile never left her face as she saw the man panting and looking at her with a combination of agitation and admiration. 'He's slowly starting to come around. Soon he'll move on from his lost love and reciprocate mine.'

And that was true, as more time passed aboard the Nadesico Akito was slowly warming up to Yurika. He loved Ruri and even though he thought he dead, he didn't want to betray her. But with Yurika's constant showering of affection on him, and added to his heavy burden of piloting and grief, his resolve was fading. 'I know I shouldn't even think about a relationship with anybody right now, and it feels wrong to do so even knowing she's gone. But would she want me to live alone forever? I can't keep shutting people out. I've tried that and it doesn't work.'

Letting his earlier anger fade as it always does when Yurika was involved Akito filled Yurika in on what had happened during the episode and the two watched the rest in silence. If it meant being with her dearest, Yurika would have put up with far more than an anime that was really starting to grow on her.

-Section Divider-

After Yurika left his room for her shift, Akito threw on his piloting gear. Heading to the simulators, the man allowed himself a small smile. 'Well I did tell Akatsuki I'd have a spare with him, but I want to freshen up a bit first.' Waving at Nakushita as the man walked over to his own pod, "You don't mind helping me do you? I mean if you had other plans…"

While it wasn't confirmed, speculation on the Nadesico placed Nakushita and Inez as a couple. They lived together on Mars, were almost constantly together, and well nobody else besides Akito talked to the man besides Inez. 'I'd hate to drag him away from Inez if they had plans or something.'

Ruri wished Akito could see the blissful look on her face whenever the two of them could spend some time together. "Nothing planned that can't be done later. Now don't expect me to go easy on you, he won't." It was almost comical to Ruri at this point how Akito still doubted his abilities. 'His main problem is he follows the standard rules so much where Akatsuki is more likely to bend them to suit his needs.'

Launching the simulation program, both combatants mentally prepared themselves for battle, all while Yurika watched and evaluated Nakushita's performance from the bridge. In Nakushita, Akito found a kindred spirit again. To Akito, Nakushita lost something valuable to him as well, and Akito just felt really comfortable around him. Dodging the virtual bullets, Akito hadn't felt this relaxed and happy since he was forced to leave his small domicile on Mars.

Watching in glee, Yurika saw Nakushita score the finishing blow on Akito ending the match and signaling to the captain that Akito's replacement was far more ready than she was lead to believe. Opening his cockpit, Akito gave the thumbs-up to the victor. "You really got me there. But when was using the rifle as a club a standard move?"

Letting the fear that she had flow into the back of her mind, Ruri just waved off Akito's subtle manner of asking if she cheated. "We didn't say it wasn't allowed so I used it as my advantage. Should have said something if you didn't want melee weapons." While her tone had been playful, the voice distortion mechanism stole the emotion from her words. Over and over again Ruri questioned herself about the repercussions of telling Akito, and just Akito, who she really was. 'If we kept it secret, something about a conspiracy and…' it always ended with her being exposed and the time-line destroying her.

"Ok then, if melee is allowed I demand a rematch Naka! This time I'll be the victor." Pulling his capsule closed again and rebooting the simulation, Akito felt great. But in the deeper recesses of his mind, he couldn't stop thinking about what had happened only hours ago. Had he betrayed Ruri in his relation with Yurika, was it right for him to move on? His mind puzzling the rightness of his actions, his opponent quickly beat him. "Oh man."

This time fully getting out of her simulator, Ruri walked the few feet over to Akito's and freed the man from his mock prison. "What happened, you went down a lot faster than normal." It wasn't uncommon for Akito and 'Nakushita' to talk about their problems with one another. Ruri masking her problems with metaphor and riddles that Akito didn't notice, while Akito's problems where plain and clear.

Checking watch to insure he wouldn't be late for his duties in the mess hall, "Do you have a few minutes? I have something that's really bothering me." Akito couldn't even make eye contact with his compatriot's facemask. It shamed him to place all his burdens and worries on Nakushita, but on the ship of fools, Akito had no other to converse openly after Guy's death. 'If I talk to Yurika or Megumi they'll turn it into something its not, and I don't know anybody else that well that could help.' He didn't count out his lance-mates, but he didn't want to worry them about his emotional state as they depended on him as he them.

Knowing that the mock-battles were over for the day, Ruri shut the machines down and soon the two were seated next to one another. "Inez doesn't need me for a while, so what's on your mind?" Looking in Akito's eyes, Ruri felt lost. It hurt to lie to him, it hurt to not be there for him, it just plain hurt being on the Nadesico. 'Maybe it would have been better if I had died on Mars,' she thought bitterly.

A weak grin on his face, Akito hunched over and looked blankly ahead of him. "How long do you think should somebody hold on to the memory of a loved on before moving on?" With Nakushita, Akito knew better than to mince words that he had to just say what he meant. 'He's a lot like Ruri in away,' he thought with a mix of happiness and regret.

The moment the words registered in her mind, Ruri's body first reaction was the sudden intake of air that held in her chest as her heart thundered. 'He's still holding the torch for me. He hasn't moved on already! And he's asking me…ME if he should forget about me.' The irony was lost in a sea of sadness and pain. "Are you talking about the girl you knew on Mars?" Ruri needed time to think and hoped Akito would spend time for her.

With a few shallow nods of his head, Akito spoke much to Ruri's behest. "I won't lie about how I felt about her. I loved her and I think she might have loved me. Had things been different I could have seen the two of us married on Mars, well I can dream that if things were different it would have happened that way." While time had done its magic on Akito's recollection of things, and widened his perceptions on how the two really were. With time to pine over his memories, Akito saw the signs that Ruri shared his feelings, but it was to late now.

With another blow to her heart, Ruri put her hand supporting on Akito's shoulder. If she was offering or seeking support is debatable. The crisp yet gruff artificial voice from her mask responded, "But now you think its time to give up on that dream. You're afraid of how she would feel if she knew about this. If she'd be upset?" The words came out of her mouth but she didn't quite understand them.

Again Akito's head bobbed in agreement. "I know she wouldn't want me to seclude myself from humanity or anything, but I don't know if its right for me to just…give up." While the words didn't rationally equate to the truth of the matter, but for the two's sake they worked just fine.

She knew it was a lie, but she couldn't help herself for being selfish. "If you don't feel ready then don't do anything. I'm sure if anybody has feelings for you they'd wait for you to be ready." Hell Ruri knew from experience that if she were in Yurika's shoes she'd have made a play already, but that was because she knew what life with Akito was like. 'I can't hand him to somebody else when I'm still here,' Ruri's thoughts full of confidence. She wouldn't prevent Akito from acting, but she wasn't going to give him gift wrapped to either Megumi or Yurika.

Hearing the soft beep from his watch, Akito stood on aching legs and offered Nakushita a hand up. "Thanks, I think I'll wait a little longer than. It just seems to soon still," almost adding that he knew Yurika would understand Akito stopped himself. 'Where did that come from! I…I like Yurika as a friend yes, but…' He couldn't refute himself. Akito was slowly being won over by Yurika's infallible kindness and positivist. "I have to get to the mess hall, thanks again." Nakushita just waved as the shaggy brown haired man ran off to his station.

-Section Divider-

More than one romance was currently on the rocks on the Nadesico, Minato and Goat who quickly found each other an item, were having troubles. Valuing her independence over all else, Minato wasn't happy to hear the subtle hints Goat kept dropping about her potentially leaving the ship. 'I'm not some prize for him to show his friends and polish at night,' Minato thought hotly as she walked to her console and sat heavily in her chair. 'Just because we're back on Earth doesn't mean he can just drop me off.'

"Problems Minato?" Megumi asked her fellow helmswoman. Seeing the slightly older woman as a mentor and confidant, Megumi was startled to see Minato anything but calm and collected. Checking the captain's position and finding Erina there and not Yurika, who had ran off suddenly not five minutes prior, Megumi moved over towards her friend for a more private conversation.

Her lip curled up in a snarl, Minato grunted, "A stupid man is the problem." She was shocked to find herself in the relationship in the beginning. Minato had her reservations about military men and their practices, but she found Goat had a very caring side as well, or so she thought. Turning away from her helm controls, as the ship was currently hovering around Japan, to face her friend. "I don't really want to talk about it right now, but how about you. Any progress?"

"If you're asking if my cooking has improved, sorry I've ruined at least five pans by now," Megumi admitted. Trying to win Akito's heart with food had been a disaster, and Megumi vowed that when they got together she'd leave the cooking to him. "On a lighter note, we did share a very nice time in the rec-room the other day." Suppressing a giggle and fighting the urge to blush, Megumi remembered the encounter in total.

Now Minato was sharing the younger girl's smile. 'She seems innocent at times, but when she wants to be that girl is down right vicious!' Leaning back in her chair and letting the stories of the other girl take her trouble away, "So did he play the 'sempai' again?" Minato couldn't get over the recount of Megumi and Akito's first visit to the rec-room together. 'She doesn't pull any punches.'

"Not this time. This time I went a different route. You know how in the old shows a girl would say if she beat a record or something her coach had to kiss her?" Megumi's time as a voice actress and her knowledge of Akito's favoring of anime was the guiding path for her choices in simulations.

Laughing softly, Minato could see it clearly in her mind. Megumi in a very short track outfit or maybe a swimsuit looking at Akito pleadingly as she asked, 'if I beat two minutes you have to reward me with a kiss.' She wasn't far from the truth either, and for what it was worth, it was a swimsuit. "So how did it end up? Did our little track star get her wish?"

A momentary frown crossed Megumi's face. "Well I hadn't counted on not beating the record. It was funny to see his face though when I finished. He looked like he didn't know what to say." The memory brought a few chuckles out her own mouth. "He looked like he had done something wrong."

"So I guess you didn't get your reward now did you, it's a shame." Minato meant it too. She hoped that Megumi won her battle for the heart of the pilot. She liked Megumi and saw Akito as a good match for her. 'She's better suited for him than the captain or that tomboy pilot that's showing more than a casual interest in him,' Minato thought reflexively.

This is when the blush on Megumi's face darkened from light pink to a dark crimson. "Well actually he did kiss me," noticing how Minato's jaw dropped ever so slightly Megumi realized she withheld some information. "On the cheek, he said it was for trying my best."

"A kiss is a kiss, and if I were you I'd take a lunch break early and see what he's up to, unless you want the captain to do it before you," Minato said softly with a Cheshire grin. With a fierce nod, Megumi ran off to the mess hall. With the girl gone, Minato thought heavily on the subject. 'He seems to be a nice guy after all. I wonder if he's gotten over whatever Megumi said happened to him. Oh well I'm sure Megumi will find out.' Any further thought on the matter ended as Goat entered the bridge with as close to an apologetic look as he ever got on his face. "You big dumb lummox, get over here," Minato said with a small shine in her eyes.

Erina just watched it all and gathered the information. She needed to know what was going on and how to manipulate the crew for her best interests. Over hearing the talk about Megumi and Akito, Erina was plagued with one thought, 'Why are so many people so interested in him?' Sure Erina has her interests in Akito, but those were work related, mostly.

-Section Divider-

Lying face down on her bed, Ruri felt very irritable. Life just had to keep on picking on her for no foreseeable reason. 'I grow up as an experiment, get sold as a piece of equipment, get a big crush on Akito as a child, go back in time, and now…now I'm giving love advice to the man I love because he thinks I'm dead.' The pillow didn't offer her anything but a soft surface to smother her face with.

Walking into the shared room and finding Ruri in a unique position, Inez couldn't help herself. "If you're that hungry I could get you something, but please Ruri don't eat the bedding." Stifling a laugh when Ruri's body went ridged, Inez set her paperwork on her impromptu desk. Her hand swiveled the chair around and she sank into the plush cushion. "So what's wrong this time, Akito finally beat you?"

Rolling over onto her back, Ruri tried her best to fire lazars out of her eyes and incinerate Inez. When that failed, "No, he asked me when I thought it was time to move on from a relationship." Inez was correct when she thought she heard sadness in Ruri's words. Ruri's time on the Nadesico hadn't done much to help her social skills, in fact they had degraded a trifle.

Sensing the uncharted waters of the whole Akito conundrum, Inez dropped her jokes and became serious. Ever since the Chulip incident Inez had noticed a change in Ruri's actions. 'She's more confused and worried now because things are changing. I don't blame her I'd be the same way if I were her.' Handing the prone girl the folder she had, Inez tried her best to calm her ward. "So far nobody has noticed you or the fact that you were with us back then. Those records were only accessed once, but whoever it was hasn't done anything against you so I'm sure it was just some nosy person wondering if Akito and the captain really did do something."

Ruri's eyes narrowed ever so slightly, "Or if you and he did something. I've heard a lot of rumors from the other guys aboard that they think you and he have something going on on the side." Which was another reality that the gossip mill aboard the Nadesico created, it didn't help that the men saw Ruri as a guy as well. Inez's attempts to learn about the strange connection she felt to Akito, which she credited to Ruri, resulted in her spending a little more time with the man than she realized.

Watching the cerulean blue haired girl pour over a few weeks worth of documents pertaining to the investigation into the Boson jump, Inez was puzzled by her response. "There are rumors about Akito and me? Why would they think that?" Sure Inez felt grateful for him piloting, but she also felt grateful to Ryoko, Izumi, and Hikaru but she wasn't considering dating any of them. Tapping her pen to her chin Inez waited for Ruri to respond. 'Hope she doesn't think I'm out to get him, I'm not…I don't think.'

With her conscious finally sated, Ruri closed the folder and placed it on the nightstand next to her bed. "Its just a rumor about you two. Basically the guys are saying that since you only talk to him and not them that either you like him, you're a lesbian, or…" Ruri finished by muttering a few words to fast and soft for the scientist to hear.

"What was that Ruri you'll have to speak standard Japanese or I won't be able to understand you," Inez replied with a tint of humor. If Ruri was so candid about the rumors then in Inez's opinion she didn't believe them. 'I don't think I've been behaving any more favorable to Akito than the others on the ship.' But for some reason whenever Inez thought of Akito the smell of oranges filled her senses and she didn't know why.

"I said the other rumor is that you and I are an item," rolling her eyes Ruri prayed Inez let that one slide by without further inquiry. 'But this is Inez and she has to know everything and Kami-sama help us if something needs explaining,' Ruri thought about her friend. Ruri trusted Inez to the ends of the Earth, but at times the scientists need for knowledge drove Ruri insane.

Unfortunately for the younger woman, Inez wanted a full explanation. And after Ruri finished, Inez could only say, "Well I'm sorry to break up that rumor, but I'm not a lesbian so that means you'll have to get your fix elsewhere." Ruri just sighed and hated how Inez unleashed all of her jokes and odd humor on her. 'Inez has such a sick sense of humor that most people don't even realize its all a big joke to her sometimes.'

-Section Divider-

"So what do you want to eat today?" Akito asked with a smile. While he was a pilot by necessity, he was a cook by choice. Yurika made it clear a long time ago that since he was a pilot Akito had no need to pull his weight in any other manner aboard the Nadesico.

Not really hungry Megumi asked for a salad, she was only at the mess hall to see Akito anyway. "Do you have some time to talk Akito?" While it was just prior to the lunch rush, Megumi did have some hope to talk to the man. 'But what do we talk about? I was so wrapped up in getting her before Yurika that I didn't think about that.'

After a quick look at Houmei, who gave a nod and a knowing smile, Akito handed Megumi her order and walked around from behind the counter and joined the woman at the adjoining tables. "Something on your mind?" Akito asked. While the girls came to eat at the mess, it wasn't often that they asked to talk to him. He was working after all, and they respected that.

Avoiding Akito's gaze, Megumi picked at her meal. "Akito, I know you don't like talking about it, but how are you doing? Feeling any better?" The hesitation in Megumi's voice was largely due to the eminence size of the problem she was talking about. It was almost an unwritten rule not to discuss Akito's past love on Mars, as it would always drop his spirits.

'So she's wondering if 'I'm ready' yet,' Akito thought sickly. Yes he liked Megumi and Yurika, but the constant pressure was at times irritating. He hated dragging the girls along, but he couldn't just turn off his feelings for Ruri like a light switch, no those feelings ran to deep for that. But he answered truthfully, "Its getting better. I'm doing better."

Dazzling the cook with a radiant grin, Megumi finally looked him in the eye. "I'm glad to hear that Akito. I get really worried about you. You seldom talk about how you're feeling." With renewed hunger Megumi started to devour her dressing soaked lettuce. If Akito was getting better that meant he'd be more responsive to her and eventually she'd be there to help him move on.

Doing his best to avoid further talks about his past, Akito steered the remaining conversation. The two talked about how the bridge was handling Erina being added to the command staff. Megumi asked how Nakushita was doing in his piloting, she too was hoping Akito wouldn't have to risk his life anymore. All in all the two shared a pleasant conversation, which left Akito more perplexed on his upcoming actions than before. 'Both of them are great girls and they're showing me such kindness and patience. I need to do something soon because its just wrong of me to keep this going on between them.

As the salad bowl emptied, Megumi thanked Akito for spending the time with her and, had she been closer to him, would have given him a peck on the cheek as she left. Watching the girl leave with a noticeable spring in her step, Akito just shook his head, 'some people are really easy to please.' Returning to his post Houmei laughed at how indecisive he was acting and told him to act before those girls realized he wasn't the only man out there. Almost to prove her point, Nagare entered the mess and kindly reminded Akito that they had a dual scheduled.

-Section Divider-

While the two men suited up for mock battle, another battle was about to take place. A battle of wills between the two co-captains of the Nadesico. Erina was quickly running out of leads to the identity of the fourth jumper and was now simply going to the source of the whole mess. "Captain, I need to speak with you about something," Erina cornered the Captain as she was about to leave the helm to watch Akito and Akatsuki's battle in person.

"Can it wait, I'm a little busy right now," Yurika whined to the other woman. Yurika knew that Erina didn't take her seriously, and that was what gave her the advantage. By playing into Erina's beliefs about her, Yurika could fool the other woman at every turn. 'She hates it when I talk like that, drives her up the wall,' the blue haired captain thought joyfully.

Handing Yurika a photo generated from the captured video feed, "Captain have you seen this person aboard you ship? No matches are found in the ships databanks so we might have a saboteur aboard, this is very serious!" Never one to let a probably lie go when it could be useful, Erina opted to coin the unknown jumper a threat, it could very well be for as much as she knew.

With her crewmembers at risk, Yurika gave the photo a serious look over. She might have had Akito on the brain but she wasn't going to risk the lives of everyone for her own benefit willfully. Something about the hair seemed familiar to Yurika but she couldn't place it. "Its obviously a female based on the body positioning and from the shadows," Yurika said softly to herself.

Taken back by how quickly Yurika had deduced something that had taken her over a week to discern, Erina had to admit the captain wasn't as dumb as she originally thought. "Do you recognize her then? Tenkawa wasn't originally a member of the crew, its it possible that she was added without your knowledge as well?" While the tone was civil, the body language Yurika felt reverberating from Erina was anything but.

Folding the photo and sliding it into a fold in her uniform, Yurika stopped playing nice. "Erina, are you trying to say I don't keep accurate records of my crew?" The new woman was obviously a threat to the independence of the Nadesico in Yurika's eyes. They forced her in here to put a collar around our necks and keep us in line. 'Well I won't stand to be a dog of the military, I didn't accept this command with that intention.'

"I'm simply saying that maybe," Erina drawled out the last word to add to her insinuation, "that something might have slipped…your mind." A small smirk formed above Erina's left eye as she bore down on the captain. "With all your flirtations with your crew you might have missed or forgotten something," she finished by putting her exposed palms up to her chest in mock sincerity.

The personal attack was responded with a smile, "well I believe its best to be friendly with the crew instead of watching them from the shadows and finding ways of blackmailing them into working for me. Or maybe you want some of them to work…under you?" It was a cheap shot, but Yurika wasn't in a very polite mood when it came to dealing with the would be usurper.

'She knew I was watching her crew?' It took all of Erina's discipline to keep the shock from showing on her face at the comment. "I don't know what your talking about captain, I would never stoop so low as to act like that." With her ploy in jeopardy Erina deemed it time to make a swift retreat less she become fully exposed, but not without a final remark made only to offend. "Maybe I'll go talk to Tenkawa about this woman, he always does like it when I visit him, such a nice boy he is." It was a bold face lie as Erina only talked to Akito twice, and once was on the beach where she made a fool of herself, but to her knowledge Yurika didn't know that.

Following the form of Erina walking around the corner quickly, Yurika's scowl deepened. 'Now what did she mean by that? She hasn't been with him from all that I know…' Her eyes turned towards her destination but she couldn't move, 'what if that's the reason he isn't opening up to me, it doesn't seem right though.'

Before Yurika could head to the simulator where, based on Nakushita's prior help, Akito was soundly bashing Akatsuki into the ground repeatedly, she got a call from Ruri on the bridge. "Captain, we just received a transmission from the U.F. we've been drafted to take out a new Jovian weapon designated the 'Walking Stick'

"Damn it! Why now!" Yurika yelled in frustration as she headed back to the bridge for further details about whatever this 'Walking Stick' thing. Inez was there to give her a full explanation about the new mecha, not that Yurika really wanted to know, but Inez was lost in her own world of technical jargon.

-End of Chapter-

Author notes

Well I jumped ahead a few episodes in the Nadesico time-line but I really didn't think the events had any real bearing on what I'm writing about. I hope you guys still like this and realize that soon things in this story are on their way of changing.

Just to let you know…its hard as hell to add new things to a story without changing the basic premise…obeying the laws of time are a real bitch he he he. Well again I hope you enjoyed this chapter and will continue to support the story.

Ja mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie-at-secondimpact-dot-com)


	15. Simple Request

Standard Disclaimer

Its been awhile since I updated this story, sorry about that. Its been a little while since I updated anything. Reason being my new job has taken a little time to adjust too, that and the move. But as time moves on I should get adjusted to my change and be able to get more out there.

Hope your still enjoying the story and hope you continue to support it. And to you Sleepy Kitty…waiting over.

X-

Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai

Chapter 15 – A simple request

'He's an idiot!' Ryoko's mind said for the untold time. Her hands doing routine maintenance on her Aesti, Ryoko allowed her mind to replay the mission from only a few days ago. The five Aestivalis units had to walk the distance from the Nadesico to the 'Walking Stick' and destroy the target using less than traditional methods. "How did the military of the past even think of using tanks?" Ryoko asked herself as she adjusted the ankle joint in the right leg of her unit.

Shaking antiquated military strategy out of her mind, Ryoko went back to thinking about the pilot of the pink Aestivalis. 'He was all weirded out about teamwork that he didn't mind being the pack mule. He cooked for us, hell he even took the thing out in the end, but why is he such an idiot!' It was infuriating her how Tenkawa wormed his way into her mind without even trying to. Akatsuki had tried to work his way into her pants, much to every female crewmembers fear and understanding. But no, Tenkawa had succeeded with so little effort and she couldn't get him out of her mind! 'Izumi and Hikaru aren't helping either.'

To punctuate her internal comment an energetic voice called out from over her shoulder. "Thinking about 'your' Tenkawa again?" Hikaru joked as she slapped Ryoko's back. For Izumi and Hikaru it was amazing to see Ryoko even mention a guy's name. So they couldn't just let Ryoko slide by without comment on it. Sure they were a little excessive on occasion, but if it helped Ryoko to actually try so much the better. "Or were you thinking of what you were going to cook for him next time?"

"Stir-fried Tenkawa ala Ryoko," Izumi said deadpan from her own repair work, then she fell over laughing at the joke only she understood. Having lost multiple fiancés, Izumi wasn't totally onboard for Ryoko getting together with another pilot, but she couldn't lie about how smitten Ryoko was for Akito. 'Whether she knows it or not, she likes him. She's young yet so if it does go bad, she'll bounce back.'

Ryoko's eyes narrowed in anger and her eyebrows hunched slightly above her brow in agitation. So she had taken Akito a plate of food when the other girls had as well after the beach incident. And so what if she had brought him food during the mission, food that he had made. 'That doesn't mean I like that idiot!' But part of Ryoko couldn't resist having resentment for Akatsuki for ruining the moment. She could feel something resonating between Akito and her. But Nagare just had to make his 'heart broken' comment and how she had to be careful or Akito would try to smother her with his problems. "It's not like that!"

Tilting her head ever so slightly, Hikaru leaned over Ryoko and intimidated the young teal haired woman to hunch against her Aesti. "So you weren't hitting on him when you thought we were asleep?" Ryoko's growing blush answered Hikaru's harassment, but that didn't stop the doujinshi artist. "I just wonder what would have happened if Akatsuki hadn't been there to put a stop to your budding hormones.

The anger on Ryoko's face was replaced with shock and fear. 'They had been awake! They were supposed to be asleep!' Ryoko had made sure to check her fellow lance-mates and had been assured they were asleep before she made her move. Adrenaline started pouring in Ryoko's veins as the look on Hikaru's face turned almost evil as the sneer widened. "What do you want me to do to not have you blabbing about this?"

Never one to not let teasing Ryoko get her out of work, Izumi replied quickly, "Finish the repairs on my unit's shoulder joint." She handed Ryoko the needed tools and headed for the showers with a smile. Hikaru's request was simply and more childish. She wanted a weeks worth of dessert coupons, then she too left to allow the tomboy more time to think about how she wasn't falling for 'that idiot.'

From his workstation on the far end of the room, Seiya was in shock after hearing the pilots talking. "Why does Tenkawa always get the babes?" A few of his subordinates rallied in their cry of injustice! While there were plenty of other women aboard the Nadesico for the men, and Seiya was married, it was just so odd to have Akito be so popular. And it was a nice for anger release to vent on Akito.

Section Divider-

"So what's got you so agitated now? Akito asking if it's ok for him to date again?" Inez asked as she once again found Ruri staring blankly into space from her bed. At times Ruri seemed totally fine to Inez, then at others she looked beyond lost. Having spent a large part of the day examining the data from the Walking Stick, something Ruri had helped in, Inez was to tired to just watch her friend.

Ruri's mind was not on Akito for the moment, but on herself. Soon something would happen or not happen that could drastically alter her former self. "Omaikane is about to start attacking U.F. ships. A task force from Nergal is going to appear to rework his sentience program." That couldn't be helped, but what had Ruri worried was if her younger self would ask Akito for help like she had done.

Taking her lab coat off and tossing it into a pile of dirty lab coats needing cleaning, Inez relaxed into a chair. She had wondered how the computer would react to battling both U.F. ships and the Jovians. Now she knew, but she didn't know why Ruri was upset about it. "And you hope to will Omaikane into not doing this, or are you leaving something out?"

"I ask Akito to help me save Omaikane, we use the simulator gear to jack into his memory and remove enough data to save him and get the U.F. forces to leave." Getting out of her laying position and letting her bare feet touch the cold metal floor, Ruri shivered at the touch. Her mind constantly reviewing what had happened in her life that lead her to asking Akito, and what would happen if her younger self didn't. "When I was younger I asked Akito because I saw him as like me. Afterward I started to think of him more often."

Nodding as the words flowed from Ruri's mouth and into her brain. Inez was starting to understand what her young ward was worried about. If her younger self didn't ask Akito to fulfill his role in saving Omaikane it would signify changes in her feelings. And if the younger Ruri didn't have the required feelings come time of the jump test the older Ruri wouldn't exist. "Is their anything you can do to force this to happen?"

Knowing full well that she had no options to take that didn't jeopardize things more, Ruri shock her head regrettably. "Only a few people knew that we actually performed that mission. If we tell other people we risk more." Ruri could count on one hand the total number of people that knew of the mission to save Omaikane.

Reaching across her desk to grab Ruri's helmet, Inez tossed the bulky adornment across the room. "Then stop moping about it. Go talk to Akito and enjoy the time. If things go bad I say you reveal yourself, tell him the truth, and have as much joy as you can before you vanish." It was both hurt and joy that Ruri's face registered upon catching not only the helmet but also the logic along with it. If she were to die, why not go out happy.

Sensing the want to be with Akito swell within her, Ruri donned the cursed disguise and secured it tightly. She both hated and loved it. It allowed her mobility but stole her identity. "You can be a real bitch at times you know that Inez?" Ruri said knowing the voice modifier stole the hint of humor from her words, but knew from Inez's smile the woman didn't hold it against her.

Section Divider-

"Any progress on identifying the fourth jumper?" Nagare asked from his reclined position in his room. He had heard his door open and close, but didn't spare the moment to glance at his visitor. Only two people beside himself could gain access to his room. Yurika, and if it was her, Nagare's question still fit, but he wouldn't have cared as much. The other person was his personal secretary Erina. He didn't really expect Yurika to visit him personally, yet.

Hating the man as much as she respected him, Erina took a seat in the only chair in Nagare's quarters. She had spent a lot of time trying to identify the fourth jumper, but no leads bore any fruit. "We may have to face the possibility that they got off the ship somehow. I suggest we move on to Tenkawa as our primary test case." As he was the first of the remaining three to jump, and the least known he was the best candidate. Losing a captain, as much as Erina hated Yurika, or a prominent scientist would be to widely known.

Chuckling softly Akatsuki reached over and took Erina's hand. "You're not saying that because you're sweat on him are you?" Nagare knew it wasn't the case, Erina was to career minded, but it didn't hurt to inspect every angle, just in case. As the woman quickly withdrew her hand from his, he felt a tiny bit of rejection, then let it pass. Listening to Erina's well thought out plans and reasons, Nagare nodded in the appropriate places and agreed. "We just have to wait for the right time to force him into our open arms. Don't hold him to tightly now."

Her feeling of revulsion from having her hand held by his was fading, but his open flaunting of her feelings hurt worse. The man seemed to love agitating and humiliating her. But for her career, for her personal honor she'd bear with it. "I don't intend to hold him at all, that'll be R&D's job once he agrees." Part of her mind however, unknown to the higher synapses was starting to wonder if being held 'by' Akito was such a bad thing. Her place as a woman in a man's game was hard on her pride. Things were expected of women, secretaries even more so. And as Akatsuki finally started to move on his bed and face her, she could feel the revulsion in her stomach rising.

"I expect that you'll convince him Erina, using any means necessary. We can't allow the Jovians to have the boson jumping edge on us." Gazing into Erina's beautiful eyes, Nagare for a moment thought of the person before him as a woman, and not a tool. Then Erina shifted and looked away from him and the moment was lost. "For now I suggest you try to find out as much about him as possible, and while you're at it investigate Inez and her protégé. Something seems out of place there."

Saluting the man and heading for the door, Erina hoped she could get the goose bumps on her arms to vanish. Being around superiors made her uncomfortable, unclean almost. She had done a lot to get to her place in Nergal, and some things she wasn't proud of, so whenever in the presence of somebody that could end her dreams, Erina hoped for the best yet expected the worst. As the doorway to Akatsuki's room closed behind her she let out a long held sigh, and headed off to perform her duties.

Section Divider-

From hearing Yurika's request, Akito didn't know what to say to Nakushita when the two met up for their daily spar. His student was going to be soon put into actual combat, and since they had yet to get new Units, he wouldn't be there to support him. 'What if I didn't train him well enough, what if he dies because of I didn't teach him something important.' Akito knew how he'd react to the news that Nakushita died in battle due to his lack of adequate training. He'd never forgive himself.

When Ruri walked up beside Akito and found him deep in thought, she couldn't resist the temptation of poking his side. Smiling behind her mask as Akito jumped into the air and turned to find his assailant, a mix of fear and anticipation clearly on his face. Her mind questioned, who did Akito think it was, was he happy to see 'him', or was he hoping it was one of his would-be girlfriends. Seeing Akito put his hand across his heart and the spreading look of relief on the man's face, Ruri relaxed. "What's going on in your mind that has you so lost?"

'What to tell you,' Akito thought with morbid humor as he walked into the simulator room. Following closely, Ruri was perplexed to not have an answer already, Akito seemed to be stalling for some reason. When he did open his mouth, both of them were already into their third match. "Do you feel comfortable behind the controls of the Aestivalis yet?"

Waiting to respond until after she trounced him into the ground ending the match. "I feel fairly comfortable. But this isn't a real Aestivalis. Simulation is never as good as the real thing." Where was Akito going with this conversation? A cold nub of suspicion began to fester and grow inside Ruri's chest. 'Maybe somebody's seen us and thinks its time I…'

Ruri's internal debate was answered as Akito spoke. "Yurika wants you to start flying in patrols soon. She said she watched a few of our sessions and thinks you're ready." Knowing that he too believed the man was very capable and likely to be a great pilot, but his own self-doubt and the selfish desire to not put a friend at risk kept him from being totally in agreement.

The cold nub of suspicion turned into paralyzing fear, as Ruri understood what the conversation was about. They were talking about putting her into active combat. The idea of fighting wasn't what scared Ruri, it was the drastic change in the timeline. "I don't know if I'm ready for that yet. Surely I would need more training than this before I sortie." In a normal military setting Ruri would have been totally correct, but the Nadesico was different. Akito was placed in direct combat on his first day aboard the ship with no prior piloting experience save the games he played on Mars.

"Normally I'd agree with you, but Yurika really wants to put us pilots on a rotation so we don't 'burn out' as she put it." Never did it occur to Akito that what Yurika wanted was not a rotation but his release from the Aestivalis all together. "She's telling the others about it now, so I think fairly soon you'll be out there with us."

'This wasn't supposed to happen, I was never supposed to get good enough!' Ruri's mind cried as she sunk against her controls. Surely if she went to Inez they could come up with some plan as to keep her out of the real pilot seat. But how long could they keep her out? Yurika wanted Akito as far from the Aesti's as possible so it was only a matter of time. "Do you think I'm ready for this?" Ruri's voice was pleading, not that Akito could tell.

All Akito could do was shake his head. Running his hands over each other in an act to calm his nerves, Akito thought of all the possibilities. He trusted his fellow lance-mates and knew that Nakushita wouldn't be a drag on them. And if it was a rotation that would give him a chance to pilot with Nakushita for real, something he actually like the thought of. "In the end its not up to me. I think you'd be a great pilot and would help us out a great deal, but I can't tell for sure."

Before Ruri could respond the door way opened and a loud yell reverberated in the small room. "TENKAWA! What is this I hear that Nakushita's been beating you in the simulators! That nut bar captain wants him put on the roster!" Ryoko yelled hotly into Akito's face. Her breath streaming down Akito's nose as the woman bore down on him. For a moment Ruri felt sorry for Akito, then her own sense of humor kicked in and found the concept of the bravest male pilot on the Nadesico cowering before his female counterpoint.

The back of the seat pressing hard against his back, Akito's vision was filled with Ryoko's face, and as the spittle brushed against his face, he panicked. "I've been trying to beat him, but he's better than me!" Why Ryoko was so upset, Akito didn't know. Maybe she was mad because she had trained him to a degree, or maybe she was happy. 'Maybe she's glad to be rid of me and is upset I didn't tell her sooner that he was ready.' The time they spent together on the last mission was a real eye opener for Akito. Ryoko was more like him than he thought she was a better person than he thought. And he didn't want to have disappointed her.

Shoving Akito unceremoniously out of his simulator, Ryoko took her place and looked fiercely at the masked man. "Your going to face me now rookie, I don't trust the captain's assessment !" Ryoko just didn't want to admit her real reason for being upset. That being the crumpled mass of arms and legs moaning on the outside of her cockpit. She knew, like the other hopeful suitors, that Yurika's aims were not a well-stocked pilot staff but a private chef.

Akito watched in silent awe as Ryoko and Nakushita did battle on the simulator. He had seen Ryoko pilot many times before, but today she was a totally different creature. The two would have battled almost indefinitely, as Ryoko's upset mind prevented her from using her full skills, had the emergency klaxons sounded. They were under attack.

Section Divider-

Ruri, that is the younger one, was not just worried, but terrified as to what might happen to her seemingly only friend aboard 'the ship of fools' that being Omaikane. He had targeted friendly units during the last skirmish, and now Nergal was planning on clearing out all is data to prevent further events. 'I don't want him to lose his memories, but what do I do?'

She knew of a way to stop the need for the full rewrite of Omaikane's memory but she would need hardware and somebody willing to fight for her. But with the few people she truly knew aboard the Nadesico it seemed unlikely anybody would do such for her. 'There is Tenkawa-san though. He would probably help you.'

"What's wrong kiddo?" Seiya asked as he stepped out into the simulated greenery that the arboretum offered. Seeing the large number of suit clad men carrying laptop computers, he had grown worried that they were there to spy on him or even arrest him for something he forgot he did.

Dismissing the 'kiddo' remark Ruri saw the head of maintenance and an uncertified lunatic. "I was debating on how to save Omaikane's sentience from the Nergal attempts to purge him." She had wanted to add that the man was an idiot for thinking less of her due to her age, but kept that comment to herself. The man did have access to hardware that after some alterations could easily help her cause.

Whether is was the lighting, simulated dusk, having a child Ruri's age, or even really in her voice, Uribataki felt moved to help the young girl. "Well what have you thought of so far?" He didn't know what to expect from such a young girl. When Ruri started into her detailed plan, Seiya was more than impressed he was astounded. Ruri had thought of everything she needed to pull one over on the 'proctologists.' As he had no love for the men in Nergal and downright hated the Admiral they placed aboard his ship, Seiya was all for helping Ruri. "So what do we need now?" he asked signifying his wiliness to help.

"If you'll provide the hardware all we need is one of the pilots to dive into the computer system with me." This was the tricky part in the plan. It was all for her benefit and nobody else. The rest of the ship could care less what happened to the computers memory they didn't consider it a friend. When Seiya asked if she had anybody in mind, Ruri couldn't keep her mouth shut, spilling out Akito's name to quick for her to cover up, Seiya's face grimaced for a second, then lead the young woman down to his room. Where he already had set up a hacking point of his own conveniently used to insure he and his family lived happily.

Standing in the man's room, which smelled a little off to her young senses, Ruri waited for Seiya to return with the pilot in tow. Puzzling over how to address the childish man about her whim, she had hardly come to a conclusion when the door opened and Akito was lead into the room. "Uribataki said you had something to ask me Ruri-chan?"

A faint blush spread across her face, partially in embarrassment from being called chan, and also her fear of asking him. In the end she did what she always did, said what she wanted to flat out and hoped for understanding. Bowing at the end she nearly pleaded. "Please Tenkawa-san, if you don't help me Omaikane will lose all his precious memories."

Leaning against the door, Seiya knew Akito would do it. Nobody with a caring heart would have turned down such a sincere request. But just to insure the younger man acted, "How can you turn down that face?" If Akito had intended to turn down the young girls request Seiya didn't know, but better safe than sorry.

Conflicting memories and ideas battled in Akito's mind as Ruri looked at him for his answer. He could see his Ruri in the younger girls face, the same determination, the same straightforwardness, and even the same subtle weaknesses. Smiling at the girl Akito walked further into the room. "What do I have to do?"

Section Divider-

Sitting in her room, Ruri was breaking a taboo that she hoped would go unnoticed. She was logged on to Omaikane and watching her younger self and Akito maneuver through the virtual space that represented the computer systems body and mind. She had taken safety precautions and unless somebody was actively looking for her nobody would see her, she hoped.

'With my younger self illegally logged in it won't show up on the log, so if anybody looks it'll just be Ruri Hoshino logging in as usual.' Ruri knew that if Inez were in the room the scientist would have killed her. Omaikane would know she was different, her brainwaves were different than the ones the younger Ruri had, so cross-referenced with the DNA scan required to log into the system at the level she was on, the computer would know. Ruri just hoped her old friend would talk before attacking.

Part of Ruri had relaxed dramatically after she tentatively logged into the system, and knowing where to look for her love and younger self, spotted the masking signature of Akito's mock Aestivalis. Finding them had proven that so far the time line was intact enough to keep her in it and unchanged. That was how she felt until Akito battled Omaikane's virtual defender. In her memory Akito chose to change into Dragon Ganger to finish off Omaikane, but as she watched him battle the champion of justice she was brought to near tears.

Gone was the updated and stylish Dragon Ganger, replaced with a comical super deformed likeness that struck Ruri at the core of her feelings. Akito was piloting the plush Gekiganger from their childhood, complete with giant Q-tip missiles. Ruri even saw the look of astonishment then humor on her younger forms face. 'He truly hasn't forgotten me yet, I'm still in his heart,' Ruri thought then did begin to cry. It was just too much for her to take in and accept given her inability to act.

So as the young Ruri and Akito logged out from the successful mission, leaving the new Omaikane deeply in Akito's debt, one that in the older Ruri's time was repaid by finding and telling her about his orphanage, the elder Ruri logged off as well. Pulling her hands reluctantly away from the interface, another problem was presented to the young woman. The semi-addiction she had for computers, Omaikane being even harder for her. All Ruri's life until the destruction of Mars, she had been deeply rooted with computers. Yurika had been right to force her away from the virtual setting as Ruri delved deeper into not work but need for connection.

Walking back into the shared room, Inez was baffled at the odd remarks Yurika and Megumi had said to her not twenty minutes earlier. Both women had come separate of the other and asked if she had seen Akito. Letting her sense of humor take over, Inez said she hadn't seen the man since she had given him a check up. Megumi blushed at how Inez said it while Yurika's face darkened, they had both bit into the bait but with separate results. Yurika was slowly loosing patience with the other women and was soon to play her trump card and gain Akito over them.

Letting the oddness of her fellow shipmates drift into the back of her mind, Inez saw the mixed emotions on Ruri's face. Inez saw happiness, sadness, and something attune to a fidget, something she had seen smokers do after going to long without a cigarette. "I take it the mission was a success?" Inez asked with more hope in her voice than confidence. 'She could be happy to know she'll have some time with Akito before she fades away.'

Sparing the computer interface a longing glance, Ruri knew not to tell Inez about her time on the computer. Inez had set up a viewing channel for Ruri to use, one that Ruri didn't view as she wanted to closer seat to the action. Cracking her knuckles as the feeling, no the need to log back in fell over her senses Ruri forced her attention back to Inez. "From what I can tell they were totally successful."

"So young Ruri gets a hero and a budding crush," Inez said with a smile that was bitter and joyous at the same time. Both women knew a lot of good had come of the feelings Ruri had for Akito, yet given her precarious situation a lot of bad could happen. "On a side note, I think the captain is buying into the rumors that Akito and I are hiding something from the rest of the crew."

"Oh?" was all Ruri could manage to say in regards to Inez. With the imminent fear gone, Ruri was allowed the small comfort of time again. But the feeling of being cut off started to grow again. Cut off from Akito, Omaikane, and from the rest of the crew that had became a pseudo-family to her.

As Inez broke into a full explanation of what she meant to Ruri, whether the blue haired woman wanted to hear it or not, another woman had gasped in utter shock as something totally impossible had happened. Erina was going over the computer access logs for Inez's room when she saw the young Ruri Hoshino leaving Seiya Uribataki's room followed by Akito. 'The log says Ruri was logged into the computer in Inez's room, but that isn't possible if she was over in that techs' place.'

Erina had bugged the computer access in Inez's room as per Akatsuki's orders, but she didn't think the results would pan out so quickly. Something was going on with Inez and her companion, and now seeing how Ruri and Akito had left that room together, maybe Erina had something she could use as leverage to get Akito to work for her. Not Nergal, not Akatsuki, but her. 'I have a lot to work on now…but this could be really interesting.'

End Chapter-

Author notes

Yes things are getting more complicated as things get simpler. Can't have a good story without multiple layers to it now can you? Hope you liked this chapter and I hope you continue to read it and forgive me for my sporatic times in updating it. I'll try to work faster on it while improving the quality of work.

Ja Mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie-at-secondimpact-dot-com)


	16. Merry Christmas

Standard Disclaimer

Yeah I know…I've been slacking on this story, but I've been trying to think of how exactly to progress over the next few areas of thought I have. Things are getting complicated and complex and I want to insure not to mess anything up. Hope you enjoy this story and continue to support it

-X-

Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai

Chapter – 16

Merry Christmas

"I have things to do Won-kun, so if you don't get to the point soon I'll have to bid you good day," Inez said dully as she continued to walk towards her room. The time since Omaikane's bout of insanity still fresh on crews mind, nobody was really shocked to learn that a joint military and Nergal inspection crew was soon to be boarding the ship. While much of the ship couldn't care less, the dual Christmas parties playing heavily on their minds, Inez knew things were going to get intense as per Ruri's forewarning.

Smiling smugly, Erina handed the prissy blond scientist a computer log print out. "Something about this doesn't seem to fit Fressange-san." Inez's eyes widened briefly before her mask fell back into place, she knew exactly where Erina was going and Inez didn't like it. Erina's finger tapped the line detailing her point. "What could the resident computer user be doing in your room while we have eyewitnesses claiming she was with Tenkawa-kun on the opposite side of the ship?" A quick check into Seiya's room had given Erina all the data she needed on what the young Hoshino was doing with Akito there, and she didn't care.

Being backed into a corner and having her protégé nearly exposed, Inez had to think quickly. The print out had confirmed one of Inez's fears that Ruri had been logging into Omaikane without telling her, she'd talk to the young woman about that later. But how did Erina happen to be monitoring her computer, why would she, then the reason fell into place. "I assume you have all the proper legal documents for illegally hacking my computer to support these aren't fakes of some sort?"

Erina lost her footing momentarily as Inez hit a delicate point in her offensive. She had no reason or cause to have been monitoring Inez's computer, just Akatsuki's hunch. Rubbing her temples as a pain started to grow fiercely behind her eyes, Erina was just going to lay her cards on the table. "Look I know something is going on with you and that guy you live with. All I want is you to assist me with my research into boson jumping. You do know a lot about it and we can't let the Jovian's keep the technology to themselves."

Inez loved playing with people that weren't really on her level of manipulation. With Erina letting her wants known so quickly gave Inez a lot of maneuvering room. 'So she plans to blackmail me into helping her where I actually want to be there, this could be good.' Narrowing her eyes and drawing her lips into a thin nearly lipless smile, Inez stopped her forward movement. Handing the papers back to the reaching hands of Erina. "And how do you suppose I help you Wong-kun?" Inez noticed the twitch in the young co-helmswoman's eye at being talked down to.

"If the rumors I hear are correct you and Akito Tenkawa are in some sort of relationship," Erina stated bluntly. Erina didn't believe the rumors, not with such a woman as stood before her. The beautiful blond was about as enjoyable to be around as Akatsuki. 'Why would Akito be involved with her unless he's only interested in her body,' what bothered Erina was why she bothered to care at all, why did that boy play on her mind. "We have evidence to support the claim that he jumped from Mars to Earth after it was attacked, we think he'd be a optimum candidate for our live human tests."

Drawing her hand to her chin in mock fear, Inez felt like laughing. The rumor mill, and her own dialogue to Megumi and Yurika, had done a real number of complicating things. "You want me to get Akito-chan," again Inez noticed a twitch in the other woman's eye and put the info into her mind for later analysis, she finished with, "to participate in these tests of yours?" Pulling her hand reluctantly away from her chin as a small fear for the young man's life did enter her mind, Inez wondered briefly if this was something that had happened in Ruri's timeline or not. 'I know he'll survive and…if I can go with him that means I can take Ruri and maybe get her back to her own time!'

"That's all you need to do, and I'll let this little hack job you did go unnoticed by the captain and admiral," Erina said confidently as she thought she perceived things correctly. Her mind came to the conclusion that Inez had hacked into the computer using Ruri's identification, how she didn't know or care about, to find some data or research goals. "And try to make things fast, if the Admiral gets his way I say Akito has only a few moments left aboard the ship." Leaving Inez to get working on her end of the deal, Erina felt confident that soon she'd be able to secure her place as the new head of Nergal, with Akito as her trump card.

-Section Divider-

Smiling happily as she put up her Christmas party fliers, Yurika hummed a song to herself. Eyeing up the poster, Yurika wondered if having Seiya make them was such a good idea, the rather unique portrayal of herself in a Santa suit was bothering her. 'My breasts are larger than that…right?' She wondered briefly before stepping back to insure it was level and secured against the wall. 'I can't wait to get Akito under the mistletoe. He'll kiss me and I'll tell him about his new assignment,' Yurika suppressed the giggle that threatened to break to the surface at the idea of having her own private cook.

Yurika's good mood was damped, as a voice wafted over her shoulder, "Looks slanted to me." It was Hikaru and by the sounds of it, the young pilot was in a playful mood. Being friends with Ryoko, Hikaru's goals were aligned with the green haired tomboy, and that was to keep Yurika away from the first of the two male pilots, Nakushita having now been officially drafted and put into service. "And aren't most people going to Akatsuki's party? Aren't you Ryoko?"

At hearing one of her rival's names, the least threatening in Yurika's opinion, the captain twirled and eyed up the tomboy. "Is that true, you're not going to my party?" All the better in Yurika's opinion, it could be just her, Akito, and that young tech girl Ruri for all she cared. Smiling and waiting for the pilot to respond, Yurika again sized up the competition. 'She's not unattractive, but very callous, unrefined, and unfeminine so I think the only real worry is Inez.'

"Well what's the reason to go to your party?" Ryoko asked not knowing why it mattered which party she went to. She didn't care much for social gatherings and didn't really want to go to either. Wiping her forehead with the towel draped over her shoulder to get the sweat that accrued from her maintenance work, Ryoko felt somewhat nervous under Yurika's gaze. 'Why is she looking at me like that…is she smiling?'

Almost sensing Ryoko backing down from her, Yurika fought hard to keep the grin off of her face. "No real reason, I just wanted to have a nice get together with my crew," spotting the other potential opponent, "Megumi-chan you're going to my party right?" If others had to come, that girl would be under constant surveillance. Megumi looked over from the vending machine where she liberated her can of tea from its small metal mouth.

Opening the can and taking a demure sip, just to taste, Megumi smiled widely at the captain. Megumi's eyes shimmered with dreams of love and merry making of a different sort. "Sorry but no, I intend to spend the whole day with somebody I love," those listening knew exactly of whom Megumi spoke. Hikaru knew that Ryoko and Yurika were vying for Akito's attention, not it seemed a third was there. The geeky pilot didn't want to think poorly of her friend, but unless Akito was into the manlier of women, Ryoko didn't stand much chance on her own. Drinking more heavily of her can, Megumi turned to leave, "Hope it turns out alright for you though captain."

Yurika followed Megumi until she rounded a corner and was lost to the winding corridors of the Nadesico. 'Like hell she will' was Yurika's all consuming thought. The young comm. officer would have another thing coming if she believed Yurika would lose to her. Turning back to the fleeing Ryoko, Yurika heard a few odd words along the lines of 'friends' and 'why can't I?' but didn't understand the full meaning. 'Well I better hurry, have to put the rest of these up before the investigation team gets here,' she thought sadly. Being part of the official army was not what anybody wanted as the ties were much stricter, and soon Yurika's detailed plans would be tattered.

-Section Divider-

Standing before the joint UEAF and Nergal panel was all two-hundred and fourteen crewmembers of the Nadesico. The panel had finished their search and now the results were to be given to the crew. For the most part the panel ranted and complained about how poorly things were run, how if the situation had been normal many of the problems wouldn't have occurred. And they ended by stating the plan to integrate the Nadesico into the Lunar defense unit. On the whole, the crew was relieved to hear the outcome. Most had anticipated being either fired or repositioned elsewhere.

"So we're just going to be common fighters now?" Akito asked incredulously. Having listened to the whole flow of the talks, most of the crew agreed with Akito's stance. They had wanted to defend, not be part of the task force in charge of reclaiming the still conquered portion of the moon. Ryoko, who stood flanking Akito with Nakushita on his left, nodded silently as she too didn't want to fight in pointless battles.

The Admiral's sick smile didn't cheer up his face at all. "No, you will be removed from the piloting roster. We can't allow an amateur to continue piloting an Aestivalis when we have more trained pilots available." As his words sank into the minds of all listening, only a few seemed to care. Sure all those aboard were proud of Akito, but they too had to agree with the Admiral, luck could only take one so far. Yurika felt a mix of happiness and sadness at the words, while Akito wouldn't be risking his life, she knew it meant something to him to protect the ship. Megumi was thrilled to know her hopeful boyfriend was out of harms way, and Ryoko was just plain pissed.

With the Admiral's declaration still echoing in the cramped hall in which the panel had chosen for the full crew debriefing, Akito looked on shocked. "So…I'm just to be a cook again? I'm not a pilot?" He had never wanted to be a pilot, didn't want to have the lives of others depending on him, but knowing now that he was freed of the charge it saddened him. 'I guess I can't help anybody can I Ruri?' He thought sadly, but he could realize his dream though, he could be a cook for the Nadesico.

"The Nadesico has enough cooks, and with your civilian status, you're actually to be removed from the ship," the cold uncaring voice of the Admiral wafted as Akito's replacement stepped past the other Nergal officers and walked over to the unmoving ex-pilot. "You will have to deal with some supervision as you were privy to the secrets of this ship, but I'm sure we can…" the man continued to speak but Akito could no longer hear him. All he knew was he'd lost his home again, once things started to get back to normal he was thrust back into chaos.

Seeing the pain in the man's eyes, the woman sent to replace him felt a twinge of remorse, but it was her job. Saluting the man, "I'm sorry we had to meet under these circumstances Tenkawa-san," the woman extended her hand. After a few moments of worry that her hand would float their unnoticed, Akito shook out of his near shock and accepted it. "I wish I could have tried your cooking at least once." Her words did nothing to sooth the sudden searing pain in Akito's heart and mind. Nothing did.

Megumi, at seeing the new woman still holding Akito's hand, and knowing now that if she stayed on the Nadesico she would lose Akito jumped forward. Pushing the female away from Akito and taking both of his hands in hers, "Then I'm leaving too…I'll go with you Akito, both of…us?" Megumi looked into Akito's eyes as the man shook his head. The pain in his eyes was so great that Megumi couldn't face him, and turned away to look at the floor.

'I can't drag another into my pitiful life. Ruri was there and look what happened to her, maybe its best this way,' Akito thought as depression started to quickly descend upon him and kill whatever happiness it found. "Megumi-chan, I can't let you do that. You mean to much to me to let you throw your life away to follow me." The woman's arms went slack as Akito spoke, the whole crew was listening and soaking in every possible meaning. "I don't know where I'll be going, living, or what I'll be doing. I can't let you throw away your life for this." Akito looked at Yurika, who for once wasn't upset that another girl was by her Akito, she was to overwhelmed by her own emotions. "Goodbye everybody…it was great knowing all of you."

Running out of the room before his tears broke free and he cried, Akito heard a few of the tech crew he did befriend and Seiya calling out to him to come back, he even thought he heard Ryoko yelling after him, but he couldn't, wouldn't be allowed to stay so why prolong the pain. Through her mask, Ruri, even knowing the parting was to be brief, felt a tear threaten to fall, it was a painful scene to view. Turning to Inez who looked impatient to leave, Ruri nodded and let Inez lead her out of the now deadly quiet room and to the waiting ship that would take her and Inez to Nergal's main R&D division.

-Section Divider-

While the others might not have had the courage to say anything or try to stop him, Yurika was hell pressed to keep Akito on her ship. Latched on to his arm, holding him from moving due to be weighed down with his bike and few belongings, Akito stood still. "Akito, you can't go, you have to say here!" Yurika pleaded her heart out. She could see him in pain, wanted it to leave, and wanted him to stay for her sake as well as his own.

Akito cared for Yurika, that much he knew for sure, but didn't want her to make things more painful than they had to be. "Yurika, they said I had to leave. I'm not officially in the military and even if I did join I doubt they put me on the Nadesico. Not after everything they said during the panel." Akito was the glorified scapegoat for much of Nergal's woes. He was blamed for the botched 'Walking Stick' mission, part of Omaikane's breakdown, and the worst part Gai's death. "I have to go."

Unrelenting, Yurika pulled harder on Akito's arm drawing him away from his bike and closer to her body. "But Akito! You can't leave ME!" Yurika wailed finally. Did he still not know how much he meant to her? Could he have any doubt that he was her dearest? If he did she would have to tell him pointblank. "I love you Akito, don't leave me!"

The tears streaming down Yurika's face glistened in the artificial light of the hallway. Their steady plink as they hit the floor was almost as deafening as the weak sniffles that emanated deeply in Yurika's chest. Akito looked at her vacantly, to much had happened to quickly for his mind to accept everything. He never wanted to hurt Yurika in anyway, his old friendship with her coupled with her usual pleasant demeanor caused his reluctance to open to others to falter and she snuck in and latched onto his heart. Akito wanted to think Yurika's comments about her feelings were just jokes, that she really didn't care about him that way. If she didn't really love him, it was ok for him not to love her. But now, now what would he do? Kissing Yurika softly on the cheek, "I have to go…but I'll be here when you get back you know?"

Trying to staunch the flow of tears from her eyes, Yurika couldn't believe her ears. 'He'll wait for me? He…he's going to wait…for me…he loves me?' She wanted so desperately to believe it, to make it true, and have no doubts. A way existed but it would be to forward for either of them, and being married away from him wouldn't do much to please her either. Nodding as the look of grim certainty was again back on Akito's face, "I'll…" Yurika's voice hitched in her throat as the words jumbled to come out. "I'll wait for you forever Akito." Leaning forward and kissing his lips softly, Yurika wanted to memorize the feel and taste of him. 'If he didn't have to leave now…we'd make a memory worth keeping us both waiting…'

But a padre of Nergal security officers was soon to gather up the ex-pilot and throw him onto a waiting ship to take him off the ship and back to land where he would have a life nobody could think of. A life with no real happiness save the idea that somebody cared about him, and in Akito's mind Yurika would find somebody better as he doubted he'd be alive long enough to welcome her back.

-Section Divider-

'So that was her plan' Ruri thought as Inez poured over research data. Being in Akito's position in regards to being a civilian, Ruri had no place to go other than with Inez. Seated in the Nergal appointed living quarters, the computer tech turned time traveler could only marvel at how flawlessly Inez had manipulated both sides to her favor. The pale while light of the florescent bulbs reflected off the metallic walls in the room and unto the two small beds provided for the two to sleep on. "So when were you going to tell me about your master plan?"

Inez made a small grunt noise that Ruri had grown to learn meant 'in a minute.' Sighing and rolling her eyes, Ruri made her way over to Inez's small wooden desk and looked at the paperwork that had the scientists rapt attention. Boson jumping theories and applied logic mostly. Most of which Ruri knew Inez had worked on prior to Mar's occupation. Sliding the last few files back into the manila envelope, Inez brushed her hair that had fallen into her face back. "Now what were you saying Ruri?"

"For me, the plan for me. You're planning to get me into one of those tests and send me back to my time aren't you." Ruri stated plainly but the accusation was evident by her contorted face. Just where in time was Inez planning to send her? Her age now was much more advanced than it had been when she first jumped. Would it be good to send her there? Maybe to the place in time to match her actual age? What difference would it make if the timeline deemed her to not exist. "I don't know what happened to Akito after he and Megumi left the ship, all I know is that Megumi came back alone and Akito jumped to the moon two weeks prior."

A cold chill went down Inez's spine. "Did you say Akito AND Megumi left the ship together?" Ruri nodded and Inez pulled out the photos Erina had given her of a clearly alone Akito Tenkawa walking the streets with his bike. "Looks like times have changed, Ruri-chan. He's in the city alone and that means things aren't as you remember." Reaching for an orange, she didn't know why but Inez just couldn't get enough oranges for some reason, the blonde took a deep bite into the fruit. "Guess that'll make things easier for Erina."

"That's all well can good, but can you tell me what you have planned for ME!" Ruri finally lost her patience with Inez's skirting the issue of what Ruri had deemed the bad plan to send her back into the future. "If you've forgotten the future I knew of is most likely gone. So I can't 'go back' to it as it were." Inez's calm face met Ruri's scowling one, Inez had only Ruri's interests in mind. The longer the girl stayed in the current time period the more likely she could affect things. If she did leave, Ruri wouldn't be able to affect things more than she already had. But the look on the pale girl's face told Inez that the conversation was just starting.

-Section Divider-

"Get in Tenkawa-kun, I need to have a little chat with you," Erina said as she pulled along side the walking form of Akito in her Nergal issued car. With the man's ties to the Nadesico severed she could use him as a guinea pig and if he died nobody would notice or care. Seeing Akito still loaded with is belongings, "You can throw that in the trunk if you're worried about it." Erina gave the man her best smile, she had to gain his trust to get him to come alone, but in his current state Akito didn't needed much to motivate him to help anybody.

Putting his bags in the trunk once Erina opened it, Akito slid his bike into the back seat and climbed into the passenger side. "What do you need me for Erina-san, I'm not a pilot or anything anymore." It was amazing how quickly the depression had hit him. Two days after he had been discharged from the Nadesico and he was still homeless and looking for ways to end his internal ranting about how he failed. "I really can't do much."

A sudden flush spreading across Erina's face, she knew of an easy way to get Akito to do whatever she wanted. Taking the car out of idle and heading back towards the research building, Erina's right hand found it's way to Akito's hip. "Things have been hard on you haven't they Tenkawa-kun. But I know of something only you can do, and if you help me…" she gave his hip a small squeeze, "I'll help you forget about things. Fair deal?" Erina's heart started pounding in her chest; it was just a ploy to get him to work for her, which was all right? She had been forced to do far worse than sleep with a man too not only keep her position but to advance it. So why was she feeling so…so nervous?

Blushing softly and forcing Erina's hand off his leg, Akito kept his eyes forward. "What do you need me to do for you?" Akito didn't get the full meaning of Erina's offer, but all he knew was if it gave him some shelter he would at least consider it. Sleeping on a park bench was the last experience he wanted to repeat. Erina said she'd tell him all about it once they arrived at the research station. After that the two lapsed into silence, for Akito it was welcomed, but Erina felt herself wanting to know more about this man. He had almost completely brushed off her offer, unlike her old bosses that had made it clear that she was required to.

The small white car with the Nergal emblem on its hood eventually found its way to the parking deck, and Erina walked Akito to the viewing podium for the life subject boson jump testing. Informing Akito about the CC's and what she wanted him to do, be a human subject in the tests, all seemed to be going well for the aggressive Miss Won, that is until Inez showed up and the last human test's Aestivalis crashed in a heap beside the tulip. That was when Akito left, walking away down the street, he was depress yes, but not suicidal.

Inez laughed softly, "So that was your plan was it? Seduce him into killing himself?" Inez doubted that Akito would have died during the test, in reality Inez was very sure that had Akito stayed much would have been learned. But for now, Inez wouldn't betray her future knowledge. "I guess you can't force men to do your bidding can you, he's walking away from you and Nergal forever it seems."

Yes she had lost her first chance at getting Akito to be involved in the tests, but Erina knew something that Inez didn't. "He'll be back. He's lost and has nothing and nobody to support him. I give him another night on the street and he'll be back." He was a failure, and looser that had a lucky break that's all. Erina's brain tried again and again to reinforce the idea that she didn't care at all about the man, but Inez saw it despite how hard the Chinese woman tried to hide it.

"So will he be in your bed as well, is it all apart of the deal you made him?" Inez didn't hold any ill will for Erina for using such methods; it was actually common in the business world even if it was distasteful. What Inez felt was pity for the woman, forced to do things that many before her had to endure to keep afloat in a mans' world. What had kept the words of distaste from coming from Inez's mouth was the way Erina looked at Akito as he left, she had some feelings for him. Maybe it was infatuation or maybe sympathy, either way Inez choked back on her more biting comments and left the woman to her thoughts, Inez had many of her own and much to inform Ruri off.

-Section Divider-

Ryoko swore heavily as the newbie's Aestivalis vanished alongside the new Jovian assault unit only to return crushed. "How are we supposed to fight these things?" She asked anybody listening that had a good idea. Izumi wasn't much help, still wearing her ghost outfit from the party, and Hikari was trying her best not to be shot from behind. Akatsuki however did have a solid plan, he had marked out the jumping pattern of the two units and informed the others of it.

Listening to Akatsuki's newfound knowledge, Ryoko fired a salvo of heavy arms into the air hoping the menace would teleport into it. "If you're wrong I'm about to become a mass murderer!" Ryoko threatened as her weapon ran out of rounds. A moment of panic filled her body as looked at fire trail her explosive charges were making as they headed towards the building. Then exploded prematurely as the enemy unit did appear as planned, sending the unit to the ground, where it initiated its kamikazi program unknown to the human pilots. "Alright now get the other one!" Ryoko ordered her surviving lance-mates, as she was incapable of delivering any further damage.

"I'm on it!" Hikaru cheered and fired much like Ryoko did into the open air, her timing was slightly off however. The round went wild as the jump field warped the air currents and sent Hikaru's missiles skyward. Izumi however had anticipated that and fired at the legs, so as her volley inclined it struck the enemy in the chest and the lumbering behemoth went silent. "Way to go Izumi! Mine had a mind of their own!"

Izumi's joke however was lost in a bevy of emergency klaxons and messages that the thought destroyed first unit was about to explode and take out the entire city. Akatsuki, as well as the surviving female pilots, turned their eyes towards the growing mass of energy as it walked towards the Nergal research station. They knew they'd not make it in time, but they had to try, that was when Ryoko noticed movement on the top of the nearly destroyed building. "Is that…"

"It's Tenkawa and the new old ex-pilot!" Hikaru exclaimed as her own visual's picked up the movement. Akito was running towards the mecha with a box in his hand, and Nakushita was right behind him. "What are they planning to do throw a bomb at it?" Hikaru asked as Ryoko's horrified face filled her other comm. channel. They all watched silently as Akito threw the box he had in his hands at the oncoming death only to see it open and spill hundreds of small blue stones.

Faintly the Aestivalis and Megumi on comm. picked up Akito's cry, "This is something only I can do!" Then the man screamed aloud while his body appeared to fill with light. Lines of bright light crisscrossed Akito's body, and Ruri's but her suit masked them, as the boson tunnel opened above them all. Ryoko flew as fast as she could towards them, seeing Akito and the other man's body being lifted towards the gaping maw that had just appeared. The distortion field of the opposing mecha kept her from reaching them in time, and they were all swallowed. Over the comm. station everybody heard Yurika's tortured screams.

-Section Divider-

Akito's body felt like an amalgam of pain as his senses came back to him. He had no idea of where he was or why he was still alive, all he knew for a fact was that Nakushita had rushed after him, and a steady pounding in his head. "Nakushita…you here…you ok?" Akito asked weakly as he fumbled to his feat, the Jovian mecha nowhere to be seen. Looking around wearily Akito's heart chilled as he saw a young woman swinging a large metal pipe at Nakushita.

"You're a Jovian spy!" the woman yelled as she launched weak attack after weak attack at the barely conscious form before her. The girl had not seen Akito and had taken the odd appearance of Ruri's suit to be some sort of respirator, funny how it was claimed to be that allowed the Jovian lizards to breath human air. "I won't let you kill my family!" the girl cried again and made a wide arc swing that connected against the brim of the facemask. Akito watched in fear as the mask splintered into thousands of tiny plastic shards cascading around the them.

Rushing the girl and scaring her off with his sudden assault upon her, she hadn't know the evil Jovian had an accomplice and was off to get the military. Akito hurried back to the prone body of Nakushita, painfully aware of the crunching plastic under his feat as he made every step. "Naku…Nakushita are you…alright?" How could he be, he can't breath, he died saving you! Akito's mind yelled at him, but as he drew near, as he saw what lay behind the mask. Akito's mind came to a sudden and screeching halt. "Ruri!"

A small line of blood trickled down her nose from a sloppy blow to her helmet, Ruri stared upward as she tried to catch her breath. Her eyes, upon hearing her name moved to see the source of the call. She hadn't seen Akito when she landed and had for a moment panicked and thought of any number of possible places she could have landed, then she was attacked now…now as the adrenaline left her body and Akito rushed to her side, calling her name, her real name, Ruri sat up and wrapped her arms around Akito tightly. Of all the things she wanted to say, all the words of love and sorrow for leading him to believe she had died, all she could say was, "sorry."

-End of Chapter-

Yes Akito and Ruri have officially met again and on the moon of all places. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and I hope you continue to support this story. I'll try to keep updates at a steady processing but with my other stories…its hard to keep on one for to long

Oh and…no pre-reader was available for this chapter so forgive my poor grammar

Ja Mata

Zentrodie


	17. Coming to Terms

Hey everybody, guess what I'm actually posting another chapter, great isn't it. Work has been good, social life has been dead, and cat has been insane, but that's nothing different. Finding time during the week to write is near impossible so that's why updates are coming weekly now instead of more frequently, sorry but them are the breaks.

Well that's all I got for now, hope you enjoy this installment.

X-X

Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai

Chapter 17 – Catching Up

Dazed, Akito walked down the darkened streets of one of the newly reclaimed lunar colonies, Ruri hanging over his shoulder. 'Ruri's been alive this whole time? She's been living with us and I've been training her since we left Mars. Why didn't she tell me?' He'd have asked her the answer had the young woman been conscious. Ruri's trip through the Boson tunnel and then attack had left her to weak to stay awake and Akito was forced to carry her. With his hands behind his back holding Ruri's behind, her legs sprouting out in front of him, a parody of extra limbs, Akito ran from the searchlights of the security detachment.

"That had been a few hours ago," Akito's tired voice echoed down the alleyway. He had too much to take in, too much to plan, and to little energy to do anything. Kicking at garbage that was in his way, Akito felt something he hadn't expected at learning of Ruri's survival. Anger. He was furious with her for hiding from him, didn't she know how much it hurt him to think she was dead? That brought a laugh out of Akito's tired body, 'Of course she does, I told her to her face.'

Feeling Ruri slipping down his back, Akito took a moment to re-hoist the woman into a better position; he tried not to think of how soft Ruri's arms felt against his neck as they hung lifelessly against him. "Is somebody out there?" a timid voice rang out in the stillness of the supposed night, Akito couldn't tell the time but due to the darkness assumed the colony was in its 'night' mode. The moon had no real day or night, only what was scheduled for such.

Unsure if he should chance another encounter with security by answering the voice or to hide again, Akito stood still. The voice called out again, "Hello, is someone there?" It was a female voice, how perfect Akito's mind taunted. He'd had nothing but problems with women all his life it seemed. He saw the girl's face, illuminated by a small domed light above the door at which she stood. By his estimation the girl was about sixteen, had shoulder length brown hair, she wasn't unattractive. Cute in a plain sort of way and garbed in a dirty apron and black slacks.

Ruri's moan of pain made Akito's choice for him, he had to get Ruri someplace off of the streets so he could insure her safety. Yes he was upset, livid, at her, but he wasn't going to risk her life before he knew why she abandoned him. Emerging into the illuminated area by the door, Akito responded to the call with his most 'friendly' voice. "Miss, hello." Akito was right to think the girl had taken a few steps back into the building, he would have too. "My friend got hurt when our apartment collapsed." It was a lie, but Akito was certain the building he woke up at was a derelict apartment he prayed the girl believed him.

Wary of the man, the girl pulled the door closer to her body, ready to rush in and lock it at a moments notice. "Hurt, hurt how?" she didn't like being untrusting, but with the world as it was, and with the attacks going on it wasn't uncommon for the less ethical people to try and take advantage of things.

Turning his body to allow the young woman a view of Ruri, he'd taken off the remains of the helmet and her gloves in an attempt to make her more comfortable revealing Ruri's short hair and face. The drying blood was still caked under Ruri's nose and chin. "A metal rod fell and hit her across the face, if you could let us in so I could check and make sure that's all. We'll leave right after I promise," Akito's voice pleaded as he took a few fugitive steps closer to the door.

Ayumi had to admit the girl being held looked bad, and the man seemed very trusting. 'He looks like Kyo-chan,' she thought sadly about her dead boyfriend, killed a year back during one of the Jovian attacks. Her old feelings betrayed her self-preservation as she pushed the door open further. "Sure come in, I'll get some water for her." Akito was never more grateful for such a small blessing and quickly followed the girl into the building.

X-X

She hurt all over, not sections of her body hurt, her entire body hurt. Ruri didn't want to move, think, or even breathe as anything added to the low drumming ache. 'What the hell happened this time,' she thought as she felt something moist press against her forehead. Water dribbling down the sides of her temples and meshing with her short hair. Despite her want to not accept reality, Ruri's voice croaked out of her parched throat. "What building did I fall out of, and why did you save me?"

Not expecting Ruri to speak, she hadn't moved for three days, caught in a sudden fever that should have received medical attention, Akito's hand jerked. "You didn't fall off the building, you jumped with me and the Jovian mecha," his voice devoid of emotion. Sitting by Ruri's futon in the Amatsu family's common room, Akito had held vigil over her body while she slept. Had they been important people, Akito would have moved her to a hospital. Sadly he was a nobody, and Ruri, well Akito didn't know what to make of Ruri now, so any hope for a doctor had been dashed upon reality. Reality dictating that in a time of crisis money was the real power. "You've been in and out of a fever since we got to the moon."

Ruri's eyes opened at the toneless words spoken by a man she knew was brimming with emotion. 'Akito,' Ruri's mind thundered as she took in the blank face of the man hovering over her. She had envisioned her reunion so many times she had lost count, thought of all the different ways it could have happened. Oddly this wasn't one of them. "Akito, how…where are we?" she asked in an insecure voice that was alien even to her.

Pangs of guilt and regret stung Akito's mind as he heard Ruri speak. How easy it would be to just forget the past, take her into his arms, smother her in kisses, and hope for things to get better. 'She seems so frail, like glass or porcelain when she talks like that.' But just as the memories of good came, so did the memories of the bad. He thought of the pain and hurt of thinking her dead. He had felt it was unjust for him to live and her die, yet here she was, alive and for all intensive purposes well. He didn't know how to cope, "We are in the care of the Amatsu family. Their daughter let us in after she found me carrying you away from our destroyed apartment."

Always one to catch on quickly, Ruri made a mental note of the cover story. Laying on her back, Ruri did the only thing she could, watch Akito as he moved in short jerky motions. 'I guess I should have expected this, I mean I did lie to him. Let him believe I was dead. I didn't want to…but now what do I do.' If Akito knew that she was the same girl that was also aboard the Nadesico he'd treat the young girl differently. Such a difference could spell death for her, but that was something to think about at a later time, now she had more important issues. "She doesn't love you does she, the daughter. Women seem to throw themselves at you," Ruri tried to joke, to get a smile from Akito.

"I remind her of her boyfriend," Akito admitted with a slight upturn of his lips, not a full smile but some expression. Truth was Ayumi had taken a small shine to the man who helped her father work. Saw him as an elder brother, somebody she could trust in a place where trust was scarce. Finding an unappreciative look on Ruri's face, Akito pushed himself off the ground and to his feet. "Don't worry, I'm sure its nothing. I have to go and help her father with some cleaning work. Consider it payment for room and board."

The cry for Akito to stop died on her lips as he walked through the door. What could she say in reality that would make any sense? I didn't tell you I was alive as I'm from the future? I tried to tell you but Inez wouldn't let me. 'Or how about, gee sorry I let you cry on my shoulder about me being dead, funny thing is I'm alive and just let you suffer.' Her tactical mind couldn't come to a solid conclusion about how to face Akito about her farce on the Nadesico but knew she had to. Her racing heart was proof that regardless of how Akito may feel for her right now, she loved him, and wasn't going to just let him leave her now that he knew she was alive.

"So you're awake huh?" an unfamiliar voice called from the door. Ruri was right to assume it was the young daughter of the Amatsu family. And Ruri was also right when she thought she saw malice in the young girl's eyes. The time traveler just sighed and tried to fight back the urge to cringe, it hurt like hell when she did, as the girl walked over to her. It was going to be one of those types of conversations wasn't it, the tech thought? She was right.

X-X

Four days past in that way, Ruri recuperating from her illness and unknown blowback from Boson jump, Akito helping the Amatsu family, and all the while the two old flat mates stumbled around one another. Akito wanted to talk to Ruri but didn't want to press her while her health was down, and in fact didn't know what to say to her. Ruri was just afraid, afraid that all she wanted to live for, what she was fighting and suffering for was going to abandon her. 'I can't refute him for it though, with what he knows he has every reason to hate me.'

One week since their sudden arrival on the moon, and one week prior to Akito's nonchalant call to the Nadesico, if time was the same Ruri added, the pale woman forced her body off of the floor mat and onto her feet. She was still in slight pain, but it was easily manageable now. Taking in her environment for the first time, Ruri wondered if all apartments were the same off of Earth. The dwelling was small but cozy, wooden floors adorn with a small rug or carpet, glaring white walls hosting portraits of dead family members, and a general air of desperation. "Just like our apartment had been" Ruri spoke under her breath

A voice Ruri had grown to know in her short stay in the apartment wafted through the small hallway in which she stood. "It smells so good, how did you get so good at cooking Akito-san?" Of course it was Ayumi and by the sound of the girl's words, Ruri guessed she was with Akito in the kitchen.

'If I was stuck on the moon, the only men around two sometimes three times my age, I guess I would cling to the first man my age I saw too,' Ruri mused as she shambled her way towards the voices. She heard Akito claim it was his job and dream to be a good chef someday, some things never changed it seemed. Finding the kitchen to be nothing more than a simple stove and sink, Ruri thought of the food she had been eating while she recovered. 'Has he been making that too?' And there stood Ayumi, right behind Akito and peering over his shoulder while he cut some vegetables. Ruri was happy to intrude, "Is this the work you've been doing to pay for our boarding?"

Not missing a step, Akito replied as Ayumi turned and gave Ruri a shocked and unhappy stare, "They found out I was a pilot and the other men are asking the guard base here if I'd be allowed to use one of there mecha in an emergency." The words carried the emotional weight of a broken man. Standing in this small kitchen, using food stock that would have been left to rot under better times, Akito tried not to think of how piloting was always their to ruin his dreams and hopes. Setting the knife down and turning to face Ruri, "Feeling well enough to stand today?"

Sensing the air in the room growing heavy, Ayumi excused herself, citing she was going to check on her mother. Waiting for the apartment door to close, Ruri was satisfied with a loud click followed by silence. "I'm doing a lot better now Akito." Was he going to allow her to use such a familiar term with him, or had she in her urge to survive ruined their relationship.

Rubbing between his eyes with his thumb and forefinger, Akito wasn't ready to talk to Ruri yet, but knew it was the best time to. Turning the heat under the pot of stew down to a low simmer, Akito followed by Ruri made there way in silence, drawn by an unknown cue to the dining room table. "I guess we have a lot to talk about don't we Ruri," Akito let the words remain vague, he was going to let Ruri take things at her own pace, he owed her that much.

The metal chair felt cold and uncomfortable under her weight, Ruri realized as she fell deep into it. Neither one of them could meet the other's eyes. Where to start, the beginning, no she couldn't tell Akito about her real reasons for hiding from him. That much Ruri understood. "Akito, about…me not telling you…" Ruri's strength was ebbing away with each labored breath she took in. The air itself seemed to be heavy and weighing her down.

Breaking his silence bringing the question up, Akito slammed his palms against the table. His face still and unreadable mask, "Sorry, just…all this time Ruri…all that time since we picked you and Inez up you…you just…" Shaking his head, Akito again lapsed into silence. What Akito knew about Ruri was that she never did anything without some reason or thought. So what was her reason for not telling him? Did she not care for him any longer, did she ever, or maybe she resented him getting away from Mars while she had to stay there and suffer. 'I've been selfish to think only about my feelings about this…she had to have some of her own.'

Rattled from Akito's outburst, Ruri sat rigidly and proper, a child scolded by its parent and afraid of further disappointment. "I wanted to. I wanted to tell you the moment I saw you aboard the Nadesico Akito, you have to believe me." Though the words were heartfelt, Ruri doubted they'd reach Akito's mind. Having lost so much, and seeing how he'd changed due to her supposed death; Ruri doubted anything could truly reach him on some level.

"Its easy to say you wanted to after the fact isn't it," Akito said bitterly. While his mind was aghast at what he said, he couldn't stop himself. All the feelings of abandonment, of loss, and regret came flooding back into his mind know with the knowledge that it was fake. He wanted to forgive Ruri, to give her the opportunity to tell him why she had hid herself, but it was so hard to keep his emotions at bay. "Just show up, on accident might I add, and say 'oops sorry' and I'm supposed to forgive you?"

Not what she wanted to hear, but deep down Ruri knew she it was what she was expecting. One can't lie to another for so long and expect it to blow over. Yet being yelled at by the only man she had loved for reasons she couldn't help was as torturous as it was maddening. Try as she might to think of a good reason for her actions, she couldn't. Tears started to slowly streak down her cheeks and pool on the table. "Yes…you're supposed to forgive me." Her voice hitched in her throat and for a second Ruri wondered if she'd be able to speak again. "You're supposed to forgive me because you love me!"

Throwing her hands over her mouth, Ruri couldn't believe she had used Akito's love for her as a weapon against him. Used the knowledge of him to find an escape for unanswerable questions. Akito just gazed at her hard. Ruri was sure he'd stand up and leave her, but not just leave her physically but emotionally too. He didn't, yes he got to his feat and walked over to her. Ruri cringed back, expecting a fierce blow to her face. She believed it expected, yet the only touch was a soft one, a cupped palm to her chin as Akito lowered himself to look her in the eyes, his own moist with unshed tears itself. "Shouldn't that have been why you told me?" he asked quietly, neigh above a whisper.

Throwing her arms around Akito's neck, Ruri crushed her face against his chest sobbing. Yes she hated herself for showing such weakness, yes she knew it was wrong of her to take support from the one she should have been supporting, but to be in his arms, to feel him, not just the rough texture of her suit against her skin. She could smell his aftershave it was mellow yet intoxicating. When he wrapped his arms around her, joined just above the small of her back, Ruri and Akito both could feel it. They would move past this, he loved her and she him, so they would move on. But for right now, they would hold one another as they had dreamed of ever since they separated, later on they would deal with the why's and how's of the past.

Pushing Ruri back softly, her eyes accusing and almost hurt at the act, Akito smiled at her. 'Hope she doesn't think it to forward but I vowed if I got the chance…' Akito closed his eyes and pulled Ruri into a small chaste kiss. He drank in her essence in that light contact, savored it like fine wine, as she herself was doing. From her hiding place by the door, Ayumi sniffed quietly. Even though it meant she had no place in the man's heart, Ayumi could feel the joy they were feeling and vowed she too would find a love like that.

X-X

"Somebody seems in better spirits lately," Kazuya Amatsu said over his diner plate three days after the reconciliation. Having returned late that night from getting permission for Akito to pilot after many attempts at persuasion, Kazuya was forced to eat a reheated diner while his wife and daughter slept. 'And that girl of his is sleeping too…'

Sharing a drink with the man that allowed him safe haven, Akito smiled over his can. "I guess I got some good news over the past few days." It was confusing as hell, and it still hurt knowing that he had lived with such guilt for so long for no reason, but Akito couldn't stop himself from the elation I knowing Ruri, his Ruri was alive and back in his life. They had spent nearly every moment together after the tear filled argument that ended with a fragile rejoining.

Raising his can up to Akito, who did the same, "To good news, may we all get so much of it the Jovian's choke on it." Akito mimicked the cheer and the two men drank heavily. Letting out a content belch, Kazuya patted his bulging stomach. "You keep cooking for us, I may not let you leave. I know Ayumi would like that. Though I doubt your lady friend would."

The silly grin still on his face, Akito replied, "I doubt she would too. Though I'm sure Ayumi will find somebody a bit more her style than myself." Ayumi's still be more extravagant and flashy, a trait Kyo had in spades while he was alive.

His daughter and wife were his reasons for living, so at the mention of his daughter Kazuya lulled into silence. This man, Akito, hadn't seen the tears and screams of his Ayumi at the news of Kyo's death, so maybe flashy and extravagant weren't what the young girl needed. "A man can't choose his heart Akito. It's a woman's job to chose it for him, and smack him when he doesn't accept it. Remember that."

Not fully understanding the older man's logic, Akito smiled nervously and agreed non-the-less. "I wanted to thank you again for letting Ruri and I stay here, once Ruri can find a way for us to contact our ship we'll be out of your hair." Though living alone with Ruri again had its perks, but he wouldn't abandon Yurika and the others. 'Yurika, what do I tell her…I love her to, to an extent. And Ruri said she had to put the disguise back on when she gets back so I can't even use her as an excuse.'

After the tear stricken hug and kiss had ended, Ruri was quick to business. She knew Akito's fate put him back on the Nadesico, and that meant she was bound for it too. Though with him knowing she was alive complicated things more. Nakushita was at one time a real person after a hack job to the Nergal mainframe, Ruri in her current form wasn't. Her younger self was also a hindrance. If Akito was to know that she was both the older woman and young child he would treat the younger version differently. If his change in attitude towards the young Ruri altered said girls perception, well who could tell what altering the past meant to those that were deemed non-existent, they weren't around to tell.

So Ruri had been adamant in her facts that she was going back and in disguise again, her lie to Akito stemmed from their time together on Mars. She was an escape experiment, and if found out would be terminated. So in a certain light it wasn't a lie at all. Secondly she made it clear that she had no ties to they young Hoshino aboard the Nadesico, and lastly she had to stay living with Inez. 'It's just better that way for now, don't worry though it won't be for long,' Ruri had told him. Her rational was that it was only roughly two months until the boson jump test that shipped her to the past would occur and she'd know what fate had in store for her.

Akito's internal recounting was broken when Kazuya pushed himself away from the table, the metal legs screeching against the floor. "Well I'm off to bed now, don't stay up to late now we have a long day tomorrow." Akito waved to the man as he walked out of the room to join his family in the small room where they slept, giving the strangers a room of their own.

It was going to be a long day tomorrow, and a long night, Akito thought. He looked at the hallway that lead to his and Ruri's room. 'I'm going to sleep with her tonight,' Akito realized as he got out of his own chair. They hadn't slept in the same room very much when they lived together, and handful of times when they were too tired to care. 'Maybe she's asleep already, or maybe she's waiting for me.' While they hadn't been very clear about there feelings back then, they were totally clear now, they loved each other. He had fantasized a few times about 'sleeping' with Ruri in the past, but thought it impossible then due to uncertainty, now however well the future is unclear, that's why it's the future.

Walking into the room and looking at Ruri's futon, Akito gasped as he found a pair of eyes looking at him, waiting for him. He shut the door and got into his futon, what happened afterwards neither Akito nor Ruri regretted.

X-X

'He's dead…he's dead and I was powerless to stop it,' Yurika sobbed as she clutched her pillow against her body tightly. Akito, the boy she loved ever since she met him, had died protecting them all from destruction at the hands of the Jovians. At first she didn't accept it, thought it was a lie, a problem with the projection over the comm. lines.

Erina and Inez confirmed what happened once there were aboard again. Yurika wanted to slap the self-righteous smirk off Erina's face when she saw her step foot on the bridge. She punched the woman after Erina said 'At least he was a hero in the end.' To Yurika, Akito was always a hero he wasn't just a guanine to use and wash her hands of after he was spent. 'What do I do now?' Yurika thought absently, the spark inside her gone.

"Yurika, are you crying?" a voice from a comm. channel asked her. She didn't even look up at it. She had disabled the link to her room after she had shut the door, she didn't want to even see artificial light at this point. 'Why won't these people leave me alone, all I want is one moment! Its either I need to be dumb, happy, a sexual figurehead! Why can't I be weak when I want to be?' Yurika's mind accosted itself. "Call later," was all she said.

"But if I did, it wouldn't be Christmas. Merry Christmas Yurika," Akito tried again, pained to see Yurika so hurt. Ruri had insisted they wait until after the accident that sent them to the moon had passed before contacting the ship for safety. Akito didn't understand much of the physics in it, but trusted Ruri's judgment. "Yurika look at me, please?"

Just wanting to voice to shut up and leave her to wallow in misery like she wanted, Yurika cast her red-rimmed eyes at the screen and her heart lurched in her chest and pounded in her head. She could feel every beat behind her eyes as she beheld the specter that couldn't be there, shouldn't. "Akito…dearest…is it…can…how?" Yurika fumbled as a myriad of questions filtered into her mind only to be squashed by Akito's slightly smiling face.

Laughing at Yurika's response, and her innocence, Akito just nodded to the unasked question. "Nakushita and I teleported to the moon somehow. We couldn't get in contact with you until now." Akito had to laugh at how Yurika snapped from sad to happy in a nanosecond.

Not a second after he had told her about his whereabouts, Yurika was online to the helm and setting a coarse for his destination. She had lost him once, she'd be damned if she lost him again. She wished Akito Merry Christmas just before the connection was lost and she headed back to the bridge. 'Next time I see him, I'm going to hug him, and kiss him, and I'm never going to let go of him, ever.'

Unnerved by the sudden change in their captain's temperament and the sudden change in plans, the crew of the Nadesico was just as shocked as Yurika to learn Akito was alive and they were going to reclaim him, Nergal orders be damned. Inez just smiled in her room, having gotten a call from Ruri at the same time Yurika got one from Akito. Making a new helmet for the young girl, Inez couldn't help but ask, "How was it?"

X-X

Author notes

Before anybody says 'how could you have Akito and Ruri do that! Its out of character' To you I have some orders for you.

Fall in love with somebody but never act on it physically

Have them vanish for a long time

Have them show up again and still feel the same if not more so

Keep your hormones in check while sleeping next to them

See I knew you couldn't do it so why blame them for finally consummating there relationship, I find it totally in character for them as I've matured their characters in my story. If you don't agree I'm sorry but I hope you still support my story and the characters there in.

I'm done defending myself

Ja Mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie-at-secondimpact-dot-com)


	18. What I have to say

Standard disclaimer

Wow after three weeks of having the chapter worked out in my mind and in notes I'm finally getting to this chapter. Don't know why I couldn't work up the drive to work on this story, I spent last few weeks on pet projects. Hope you enjoy it after the long wait.

X-X

Anata No Ichiban Ni Naritai

Chapter 18 – What I have to say

Akito's mind simply couldn't comprehend what Ruri had just said to him. After the previous nights intimacy Akito was under the impression that they were to be together again. Sure Ruri said she had to keep the farce of being Nakushita while on the Nadesico but was certain he could live with it. But sitting in the provided bedroom that the Amatsu allowed them to share, Ruri dropped the proverbial bomb on him. His voice hollow and dead, "You're what?"

It took all of Ruri's emotional control to keep her face from breaking. She couldn't handle the pain and betrayal on Akito's face. "I said last night was a mistake Akito. I was too caught up with the events of the past few days. We can't be together like that again Akito. I have too much going on to risk having a relationship like this." Her back mind chided her; yeah she had to keep him at a distance because it would change him. It would alter things and it would keep him from acting. Akito being in a real relationship, even if hidden, would raise questions about his changed character. Yurika would start to look deeper into his actions, and then she'd be found and that would be it.

"But I…we…I thought you loved me Ruri," Akito said. His usually passionate voice was dull. His eyes large and vacant, dolls eyes. All the pain of thinking her dead was replaced with a brief period of anger then filled with all the love he had for her. Now she was saying it was a mistake, an emotional decision made without thinking about the repercussions. "How can you say that Ruri, how?" His voice started to rise as disbelieve and anger rolled over him in waves.

Finally taking her eyes away from Akito's Ruri couldn't take the unasked accusation, 'don't you love me anymore?' She did, the last nights shared love had been something Ruri couldn't describe, yes it still hurt her physically, but emotionally Ruri could barely contain herself. That was before Akito contacted the Nadesico, then the reality of things washed in. "I have responsibilities Akito, Inez and me have a lot of work to do, and I can't be tied down by a relationship. I'm sorry, so sorry about what I've done to you but it has to be this way."

Finally the dam broke and Akito doubled over, drawing his legs to his chest and sobbed. Ruri had succeeded in bluffing him about her motives. She, in her moment of doubt, wondered if it was worth causing him this pain, was her life and the hope to survive long enough to the point she could be with him freely, was it worth it? Would he take her back if her younger form went back into the past and she was assured she wasn't in danger anymore. She ran her hand through Akito's hair, "We can…still be friends…to an extent. We just can't be together Akito I'm sorry." How sorry she was, Akito could never know.

Getting to her feet, Ruri walked away from Akito before her own tears were shed, she could feel them brimming behind her eyes just waiting to fall, but that would ruin the illusion she was making. Shutting the door to the room where her most cherished memory had taken place, Ruri leaned her back against the door just soaking in Akito's sadness. 'I'm a terrible woman. I take his love, rub it into his face, and take it away from him. I was so weak that now he'll undoubtedly hate me. I would if I did this, but if I am deemed to fade away, if things have changed and I'm not destined to live, I'd hate for him to go through that.' Ruri's motives were clear, Akito had thought her dead once, what would happen if it happened again. If they were a couple in reality, sharing happiness, sadness, good, and the bad only for her to fade away, not die but fade away. "It would hurt him more."

The next thing Ruri knew was she felt a sheering white pain across her face and her vision had changed from her feat to the left hallway. "You bitch! How could you do that to that nice man!" Ayumi screamed in Ruri's face. She had heard the noises the night before, and while she knew Akito wouldn't see her that way it still hurt. She cried herself to sleep that night, but now she had heard what transpired between the two of them while her parents were gone. "He loves you and you don't care! How can you be so heartless!" Ayumi's hand wound back and backhanded the still stricken Ruri who offered no defense or rationale, in hindsight Ruri thought she got off easy as Ayumi rushed off again.

X-X

Her heart was beating quickly in her chest, she was giddy. Megumi couldn't wait to see Akito again. When he told her not to follow him when they forced him to leave, she felt almost betrayed, until he told her why. 'He thinks he's not good enough for me, that I deserve better,' she squealed lightly as she pulled her big stuffed bear to her chest. He couldn't have been more wrong. Megumi would prove to Akito just how wrong he was once the Nadesico picked him up off of the moon. Pushing the play button again, Megumi was determined to watch all of Geki-ganger. 'If he likes this show so much I'm going to like it too!'

Megumi couldn't place why Akito was so desirable in her eyes, he just was. He was polite to her, treated her like a woman, but he seemed so sad and detached. While he was cute he wasn't the most attractive of men, but neither was she the most attractive woman. 'But I'm not going to let the captain have him, she doesn't see him for a person but as who he used to be,' she thought. The intro started and drew her mind away from why she wanted to be with Akito. For as corny as the show was, it was actually entertaining and from her past work as a voice actress she was slightly amazed by how good the voices were done.

Leaning back against the wall Megumi just watched the episode with a content smile on her face, imagining the time when she wouldn't be watching it alone. Checking her watch as the screen faded for the mid-episode break, she noticed it was time for her shift. "Well once we pick him up I'll tell him how I feel," her voice lacked conviction as she saw Yurika doing the same. Walking her small player, Megumi was about to push the stop button when an unexpected voice yelled out.

"Don't stop that tape!" the voice was unmistakably male but the sheer desperation. Turning towards the voice, Megumi's eyes widened in shock and she fell to the floor. Her largest stuffed bear, given to her as a bonus from one of her jobs working for a children's show, was now ripped into pieces as human limbs ruptured their plush counterparts. "That's episode 27, it was lost for ages!" The mutated bear rushed to the television, picked it up, and pulled it away with him back to the wall. "I never thought I'd live to see it."

Back peddling Megumi forced herself against the wall and reached blindly for anything that could be used as a weapon. "Who are you? What are you doing in my room?" Her fingers wrapped around a book edge and held it out like a shield. So far her intruder had done nothing but watch her television as if it were divine doctrine. Her initial questions met with silence she continued to force her bum across the floor until she reached a corner, she never wished for Akito to be with her more than at that moment. "What are you going to do to me?"

The bear's head turned its gaze onto Megumi, a sight that would have given any child nightmares for months, and set the television back down. "I'm terribly sorry ma'am. But I need a place to hide until I can escape. It was never my intention to harm or scare you." Pulling the bear mask off, Megumi's voice caught in her throat, what she was seeing couldn't be possible, Guy had died but this man looked exactly like him. Extending his still plushied hand to Megumi, "Can I assist you in anyway for causing you this discomfort?"

Shocked by the sheer oddness of the past few minutes, Megumi allowed the man that looked like the dead pilot to help her off the ground. She didn't miss the apprehension and hesitation in his moments, or even the blush on his face. "Who are you?" Megumi finally was able to ask after getting to her feet.

Having spent so little time with an actual woman, and referencing all of such to the Jovian template for womanhood Miss Nanako, Tsukumo Shiratori was all pins and needles. His body was ridged and unmoving. Standing at full attention, which while dressed in his normal gear covered in bear parts bleeding stuffing was enough to cause Megumi to laugh, Tsukumo saluted. "Tsukumo Shiratori of the 3rd Jovian assault force Ma'am."

'Jovian! He's a Jovian? But aren't they…didn't the military say they were lizards?' Megumi thought as she fought back the giggles that threatened to escape her mouth. "Stand down Shiratori-kun, no need for that." The man let his hand down yet still looked uncomfortable in Megumi's presence; it was oddly cute in the sheer queerness of it. "You said Jovian didn't you. Can you tell me more?"

Tsukumo didn't want to divulge military secrets to the enemy, but it was a woman! And women are supposed to be treated like the fragile and beautiful flowers that they were. So as Megumi sat down, her shift forgotten, Tsukumo started on destroying everything Nergal and the UN Spacey had told them about the Jovian menace.

X-X

Yurika could feel Erina's gaze boring into the back of her skull, feel the hatred and anger radiating from the woman, and she loved it. She knew that the Nergal woman had ulterior motives for being aboard her ship and it was Erina that had put Akito in danger. So by keeping her front of vacant stupidity up, Yurika was making Erina's life a living hell. "So I was thinking that after we get Akito back we could all go back to that we could all go for some shore leave," she said while placing her finger to the side of her mouth.

Snapping the pen she held in her hand, Erina about screamed. "Captain, we have orders to defend the lunar base now thanks to the new Jovian offensive fleet discovered!" She couldn't understand how somebody so stupid could have been given the rank of captain. 'Must have slept her way up the ladder or had her daddy help her.' To put matters simply Erina was disgusted by the mere presence of Yurika.

"But Akito just had such a life threatening experience, I don't think its right to put him on the front lines again," Yurika said in full honesty. After seeing him vanish and thinking him dead for all of three hours she was determined to keep him as far from the upcoming battles as possible. Nakushita would be doing Akito's fighting from now on. He would stay on board the Nadesico despite Jun's claim that since Nergal forced Akito off once it was against regulations to let him stay on. Husbands were given special accommodations.

Before Erina could speak her retort a small voice broke through the coming argument, "Captain, Miss Reinard hasn't reporting in for duty yet and the lunar colonies should be contacting us about airspace regulations soon." Ruri wasn't trying to pay attention to the women's debate about Akito, but she hoped Yurika won. Something about the odd man struck a cord with her, he'd helped her and respected her. Her heart warmed at the thought of him. "Should I call her quarters to inform her about her shift?"

A slight sneer crossed Yurika's face, Megumi was a problem that she didn't want to think about. Desperate women make rash choices, she'd hate to walk into Akito's room to find Megumi forcing herself on him. "Minato, we're on auto-pilot until we reach the five hundred mile marker correct?" Yurika turned from the platinum haired child to the surely looking helms woman.

Minato wasn't happy with her current situation, her last relationship was staring at her. Damn men and there egos would be the death of her one day she suspected. "That's correct captain," sensing Yurika's intent Minato almost thanked the woman, "would you like me to go and collect her?" She was already getting to her feet as Goat, at hearing a security report fled the room.

"Thanks, Megumi's been acting very unprofessionally, Ruri make a note of this in her record, we may have to seek disciplinary actions on this." Yurika smiled at Minato as she walked past her and Erina. Yurika knew about the failed relationship between Minato and Goat and was sympathetic towards the woman.

Stomping her foot at being ignored, Erina's eye twitched violently. "Captain are you even listening to yourself! We're receiving updates of Jovian activity on the lunar surface and you're worried about what the comm. officer is doing? I know you're obsessed with Tenkawa but that doesn't give you free reign to ignore a crisis!" Erina's arms pumped upward with each accusation of the captain's incompetence. What was so special about Akito that warranted such attention from so many? 'Sure he's attractive and willing to help, but even Akatsuki is more attractive.' But at thinking of the chairman killed Erina's internal debate. Where most men were domineering Akito was supporting, he wasn't interested in just sex and control, and he was actually a good guy. Her face warmed as she realized that she was looking down dangerous roads.

Turning to face Erina at her rather bold expression, Yurika's face as a total mask, devoid of emotion, she addressed her co-captain. "I'll thank you to leave my relationship with Akito out of this. You are simply trying to cover your own involvement in dangerous human experimentation. Don't let yourself think that I don't know it was partially your fault for what happened to him." Stepping closer to Erina, Yurika's voice dropped to a near whisper. "If he had died you'd have found your reception aboard my ship to have been even more hostile than they were, so please don't threaten me."

The smug look of control slipped off Erina's face faster than gas caught fire. The dopy yet happy captain had just threatened her and knew of her involvement with boson testing? How had such an airhead learned such things. Yurika was just keen on observation and had watched the tape of Akito vanishing constantly from the moment it happened until Akito called her. The box he had been holding had a Nergal symbol on it, and the contents of said box was the factor that lead to his disappearance. Finding it hard to speak, Erina gasped for air as she took sever steps back, "Yes c-captain, I'm sorry."

X-X

Her mind was in a whirl as she pushed the filled laundry cart down the vacant halls of the Nadesico. What Tsukumo had told her about the true origins of the Jovian's was at odds with what the public had been told that Megumi didn't know how to accept it. She doubted what would happen to the man if caught, but still felt bad about helping him. 'What if he comes back and kills somebody I know, he is an enemy.' But he was also a man in trouble and was lied to just as much as she. She'd help him for now. Whispering into the mess of sheets and clothing, "We're almost to one of the transports, do you think you can pilot it?"

Surrounded by women's clothing and bedding was making it very hard for Tsukumo to think straight. Added to his bizarre form of escape was learning that the vile earthlings also watched Geki-Ganger was a shock. "Yes Reinard-san, but could you hurry I'd not wish to cause you problems." And he really wanted out of the lacy confines.

Megumi's back shivered and she came to a complete stop as she heard a yell from behind her. "Megumi there you are! You're supposed to be on the bridge twenty minutes ago. We're almost to the moon and need you to talk to the base about hostile air zones." Minato ran up to the near trembling communications officer and put her hand on Megumi's shoulder. "What are you doing laundry for at this time of day anyway?"

Megumi just looked at Minato and down at Tsukumo with blank eyes, haunted eyes, thief's eyes. She had been caught with her hand in cookie jar and now she had to find a way out of it. "We…w-w-w-well…yo…you see I um…" her voice was so broken and her stutter so bad that Minato quickly deduced something was wrong. Following Megumi's line of site Minato saw what it was, a man was hiding in the basket. One she hadn't seen before and Minato's stomach iced over.

The stare the two shared over the body of the hiding Jovian pilot was broken by a squad of security officers lead by Goat. "Minato, Megumi have you seen any strange men around here? The captured Jovian mecha had a pilot and it seems he has survived and is now on the ship." While he spoke to both women, he was looking only at Minato. He had offered her everything, a nice home, money, and even a better job but she had snuffed him.

Sensing the drastic change in the situation, Tsukumo opted it was now time for him to take action. It was a cowards way but he had to get his new knowledge back to his compatriots. Leaping out of the basket he wrapped his arm around Megumi's throat and pulled her body close to his. "Sorry to do this to you women but you'll have to come with me, and you'll let me take a transport or I will kill them." He wouldn't but he needed a bluff or the security men would fire upon him and likely kill the women in the process.

X-X

"So here I am again, piloting," Akito's voice echoed in the cramped confines of the labor mech he was piloting. Lying on his futon in the Amatsu's home waiting for the Nadesico to pick him up, his depression was rudely interrupted by massive shockwaves hitting the small building followed by cries he pilot to protect them all. He hadn't seen Ruri since their talk earlier that day, not that he wanted to see her anyway. What would he say that he hadn't already? She was leaving him again, but at least she was alive.

Cursing in frustration at the clunky movements of the mecha he was in, Akito never wished he was in his Aestivalis more than right now. "Show yourself you coward!" his call sent out over the external speaker. Taking several more slow steps forward, Akito felt himself stumbling forward at an unexpected blow to the back, his words had worked in calling his enemy to him. "It IS a Geki-Ganger," he said to himself.

"Die filthy human!" roared from the Geki-Ganger type mecha as it launched its hand out towards Akito's cockpit. Quick thinking and combat instinct overpowered Akito's hero worship of the mecha as he forced himself to parry the blow. He would have escaped the blow had he been in his Aestivalis, but Labor was slower and larger. The attack smashed into his left side breaking off the arm at the elbow joint. As his opponent attack left him shaken, Akito saw an opening as his opponent had yet to recover. Using the broken yet sharp left arm, Akito threw his body towards his enemy. It was a suicide move anyway one looked at it, Akito didn't care much for living at that moment anyway.

The Jovian pilot banked a moment before it was too late and the shredded elbow slammed into his unit's unprotected midsection. Immediately afterward emergency klaxons sounded inside his cockpit, massive system and power failure. The leg units were locked into position as power wasn't being provided, if he wanted to move he had to boson jump. "Impressive human, but can you stand against the might of our Jovian might?" as angry as he was at being bested so quickly, the pilot was thrilled. A worthy opponent was a hard thing to find.

Not favoring to respond, Akito's mind had hazed over in a suicidal madness. "GYAA!" was his reply as he reeled back his unit's non-injured hand for another attack. All of Akito's pain, rage, and remorse was fueling his desire to die. He launched attack after attack at the teleporting mecha, finding most of his attacks either only landed a glancing hit or missed completely. "Why must this happen to me so much! Why can't I have happiness! Why? WHY?" He cried loudly as he continued to attack.

"Akito!" Yurika's voice broke in over his comm link. She had heard his frantic pleas and she was torn again. Megumi and Minato were being held captive by the fleeing transport that was heading towards Akito's position. The lunar defenses were soon to start firing all around him and the escaping shuttle as a Jovian battle fleet was on the move. She could end the battle though, fire the gravity blast cannon and kill them and save Akito, but he'd never forgive her, or himself. "Akito it's Yurika on the Nadesico. A Jovian pilot kidnapped Megumi and Minato and is approaching your location, stop them, save them."

'Megumi!' Akito's blinding rage bled away instantly at Yurika's communiqué. Wiling his mecha back to a legitimate fighting stance he scanned the surroundings. His opponent had yet to re-materialize, in the distance he could see the approaching shuttle. He tried to establish contact with it but failed. "I won't let others suffer! I don't want to suffer!" Rushing headlong at the oncoming shuttle the missiles from the lunar batteries started to fly by. He paid the approaching death no mind as he eyed his target.

"A..to t's Me..mi you have…not enem..." Megumi's voice filled his comm channel full of static. He tried to make out what she was saying but was to preoccupied by not being killed by friendly fire. He saw the shuttle try to bank away from him, but doing a move he had seen on Geki-Ganger he tricked the shuttle into his arms. "Akito! You have to let him go! He didn't mean anything!" Megumi's voice now clear due to the lack of distance.

Holding the shuttle with his good arm, Akito dodged more missiles flying towards an oncoming Jovian fleet. "But I can't let you go with them, I don't know what's going on but I won't let you two die for it!" Megumi's face light up with a bright smile, she'd gotten through to him. It was her face that nearly got Akito killed that day, as he listened to her tell him about Tsukumo and his predicament, the Geki-Ganger type appeared right before him and punched Akito's unit in the head sending him and the shuttle to the harsh lunar surface. Holding the shuttle protectively, Akito ushered a quick demand to the captive women, "tell him to tell that pilot to stop!"

Megumi nodded and her face vanished from view. Moments later the Jovian mecha stopped its assault. He then saw the shuttles door open and a spacesuit clad Minato and Megumi climb out and onto his unit's hand. "Let my compatriot go human." Akito nodded and watched as the shuttles door shut and the Jovian mecha picked it up. "You're a worth opponent human, might I know your name?"

Insuring the women were safe, Akito looked at the Jovian pilot and understood him. Had he cared more about his life at that moment maybe he would have acted more defiant, but at that moment Akito didn't care. "Akito Tenkawa." The man smiled at him and cited Geki-Ganger line for line. 'If we had met under different circumstances maybe we could have been friends,' then the shuttle and mecha teleported away. Akito could only think, 'or maybe you'd betray me too if we'd met differently,' Ruri was clearly in his mind as he walked back towards the Nadesico Megumi and Minato in tow.

X-X

Inez expected a lot of things to happen when she saw Ruri back on the Nadesico. She thought she might have to knock before entering or she'd see Ruri and Akito together, possibly a happier Ruri, not a sobbing wreck of a girl lying on her floor. Rushing into the room after shutting the door, "Ruri, what the hell happened, Akito didn't do something to you did he?" As radical idea as that sounded Inez couldn't think of anything else that could have caused such a breakdown.

Wiping away tears as they fell down her cheeks, Ruri couldn't staunch their flow. "No…no…it was me. I told him it was a mistake that it shouldn't have happened." Inez took a guess at what Ruri had meant, and was right. Wrapping her arms supportively around Ruri's waist, Inez pulled the fragile girl to her bed. "He- he hates me Inez…" she crushed her head against Inez's chest tears falling unabashed Inez's shirt.

"Ssh…shh, Ruri tell me what happened, why did you do it?" Inez asked as she stroked Ruri's hair and made small circles with her other hand on Ruri's back. There was no 'hello', no 'life is perfect', and no joking at Ruri's and Akito's lost innocence on the lunar surface. 'Life sucks.'

Holding Inez like a drowning man holds a life preserver Ruri tried to form words to match her thoughts. "I told him it was a mistake, that I had been to emotional at being seeing him. Told him that I can't be with him, have more important responsibilities." Taking a moment she pulled herself away from the warmth of Inez's bosom to look her in the eyes seeing the questioning look there-in. "I saw how my 'death' affected him once, I don't want him to go through that again if I fade away." But just thinking of the broken look on his face bought her own grief back as she started crying again.

Inez didn't know what to say. From a scientific and unattached viewpoint Ruri had been right. Akito had taken her 'death' hard and nearly broke due to it, if he had to go through it again suicide might not have been un-thought of. Shushing Ruri and making comforting sounds she just rocked the woman and said that everything would be alright. But would it? Inez doubted it. Ruri loved Akito, Akito loved Ruri yet from what Ruri did she doubted Akito would still be there for her if things went well for them in the future. Love can only take one so for and if one feels that love is unrequited it won't stay for long, not with so many others offering it. "It'll be ok Ruri, you'll see, everything will be ok."

She just didn't know how or why.

X-X

Author notes.

Yeah I'm sure you're a little pissed at having Akito and Ruri back together only to have this happen, but don't worry, I plan for a good ending. And it's just for now too. I have good reasons for his, and well I hope you have faith in me and my idea for the future of this story.

Be assured that things only get dark to get bright again. Darkest before the dawn so to say, and this story is actually nearing its end. Not to many chapters left until the finale. Thanks for staying with this so long and hope you enjoyed it despite the darker tint to it, last few chapters have been to waffy anyway. Oh and sorry for grammar mistakes this time I wrote it fast and posted it before I gave it to my pre-readers.

Ja Matta

Zentrodie

Tsukumo Shiratori


	19. Wounded Hearts

Standard disclaimer

Wow this has been neglected. Not on purpose mind you but as it nears its completion I'm taking special care not to mess it up. Yes, sadly this story is nearing its end but not this chapter! Well not much else to say but sorry for the delay but life does things to people that we oft wish it wouldn't or that we regret. Hope you find the wait worth it.

X-X

Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai

Chapter 19 – Wounded Hearts

Ryoko stood by the entrance of the Aestavalis hanger bay and just watched Akito futilely attempt to fix the left elbow junction of his unit. Something happened to him, that she knew for sure, but what had happened on the moon prior to his rejoining the crew was the topic of many rumors. Hearing a muttered swear and the metallic clang of the wrench that Akito just thrown, Ryoko was tired of watching. "Akito want some help with that?"

Turning his head away from the open compartment, Akito's eyes honed onto the source of the offending noise. He wanted to be alone, no more women in his life, they just brought pain and misery. "Hi Ryoko, I'm fine. Just a little rattled over what the admiral did." A convincing lie as nobody had expected the 'rat bastard admiral' to admit to murdering Guy let along steal the X-Aestavalis only to have it blow up around him. Seeing disbelief on Ryoko's face, Akito turned back to his job sans the tool he needed. "I'll be fine in a few days."

"How about we cut the bullshit Akito? Something is bothering you and it wasn't what happened yesterday. Its not the knowledge that the Jovians' are human like us, now are you going to try and fix your Aesti with your mind or are you going to let me help you!" With each word Ryoko's voice rose in pitch and volume while she continued to walk towards him. "So what's it going to be, I don't mind waiting here for an answer Akito," she said as she came to a stop right next to him.

Taking a fugitive look at Ryoko, Akito saw something on her face that he hadn't noticed before. Aside from the anger and frustration, he saw beauty there as well as compassion. While he couldn't tell her the full reason, he realized he could talk to her and trust her to a point. Whether it was real or imagined to give him an excuse, Akito smiled. "Can you get that wrench that I threw, I still need it."

A light blush adorning her checks and a steady thumping in her ears as her heart rate increased Ryoko nodded. "About time you stopped mopping around Akito." It helped to stop looking at him, allowed her to focus. When had she started having feelings for him? Why did she? Bending down and wrapping her slim fingers around the tool, Ryoko had no answers. "So why don't you tell me what's been eating at you Akito. Everybody is worried about you."

Taking the wrench from Ryoko's extended hand and trying again to remove the bent bolt Akito missed the pleading look on her face. "Have you ever been betrayed by somebody you trusted completely?" He pulled hard on the wrench, hoping the activity would fight the resurging memories.

"We all have at some point Akito. One of my best friends in flight school stabbed me in the back to get a date with another pilot." Ryoko's voice faded softly. She hadn't really cared about the other pilot like Shiori had and what hurt most was losing that friendship. "We just have to move on from it. I made a mistake in choosing her as a friend is all."

The tendons on his neck strained outward as he threw all his strength against the stubborn bolt. Sweat trickled down his neck as he pulled a moment of fear passed through him as he thought it wouldn't give. It did and the bold popped out cleanly. "Do you really think so? If you could do it all again would you not trust her? If you see her now how do you react?"

"Where is this headed Akito? I want to help you but this questioning isn't what you need. Just tell me damn it! What happened to you on the moon that's turned you into this inverted recluse?" Ryoko's forced Akito to look at her by firmly putting her hand on his shoulders and twisting him around. Face to face with him, she had to force her body to react as she wanted. Now wasn't the time to fawn over him or even be kind. Sometimes you had to be cruel to be kind. "Tell me Akito, no dancing around it with vague questions about trust and friendship!"

The fierceness in Ryoko's eyes frightened Akito, it was raw and savage nearly animalistic. "R-Ryoko…" his voice pleaded for her to back down, let him go about this in his own way. The intensity did not leave her face, she simply shook her head 'no.' Closing his eyes and dipping his head, Akito owed up to his fate. "Nakushita…we had an encounter on the moon. He followed me against my wishes during the battle on Earth. It gets confusing when we started living with a family on the moon waiting for the Nadesico to get us. It turns out I didn't really know him at all, I learned that the hard way."

It wasn't hard for Ryoko to sense that Akito was holding back something, it was written all over his face. She was tempted to push the issue and force him to owe up to the rest of the story, but she was unable to. Akito's façade of quiet strength broke as he again saw himself and Ruri together in that small bedroom followed directly by her telling him it was all a mistake, he didn't care that he looked pathetic while doing it, he cried. Slowly tears fell down his cheeks and it mystified Ryoko. "A-Akito, are…are you alright?"

The question, as pointless as it was, was answered with a bitter smile as Akito drew Ryoko into a small hug. The emotional pain was far surpassing anything he'd suffered in battle. An endless wave of pain and suffering, rolling in and out like the tides as his memory suppressed and recovered the memories. Ryoko was just a convenient outlet for it and a source of temporary relief. Ryoko was glad to offer it and tentatively wrapped her arms around him to offer what support she could. And Akito was finally ready to get on with life.

X-X

The bridge of the Nadesico was oddly quiet. Gone was the general buzz of conversations, rumors, and generally happiness. Was it the death of Admiral Munetake, the realization that the murdering lizards were in fact humans, or was it just Yurika's depression making its presence known?

As much as Megumi saw the captain as a rival she couldn't refute that seeing the usual chipper if not down right bubbly captain so depressed had sucked a lot of the life out of the bridge. "Captain, we're entering Earth's atmosphere and should be within communications range soon," the young comm. officer reported.

"No problems detected in phase transition engines, switching to standard thrust in three-two-one," Ruri rattled off from her central position on the bridge at the main computer terminal.

Yurika nodded to each woman as the spoke but said nothing, her mind was elsewhere. So much had been thrust upon her since she'd taken command of the Nadesico and it was finally catching up with her. She had not anticipated so many random yet life changing events to take place so fast. Now she was faced with knowledge of the enemy that would no doubt shatter many preconceived notions about the war, she had lost yet another admiral, and personally she was unsure of what to do about Akito. She wanted, needed, to talk to him but he had again locked himself away from everybody.

Minato said again, "Captain are you listening to me, I said that we've breached the atmosphere and have set in a course for Japan. Do you have any other orders?"

Shaken from her thoughts by Minato's near shout at her, Yurika rubbed her temples to ease the budding stress. "No that's fine Minato, steady as she goes. Megumi any transmissions?" Having been in the ionosphere would have limited communications to emergency channels or higher broadband channels used for special communiqué, Yurika expected some form of greeting from Nergal.

The captain was not to be surprised as Megumi responded. "We have two incoming lines. One is for you and Erina from Nergal while a second is for Ruri from…Peaceland?" Megumi had to check the signal again to insure she had read it correctly. Why would Peaceland a neutral country want to speak with a parentless computer officer?

Ruri's brow furrowed as she arched an eyebrow, "I have a call?" She had no reason to suspect a call from anybody, let alone a foreign country for her. Megumi just laughed nervously as she nodded. "If I maybe excused I will take it from my quarters." With that the young girl stood and left the bridge as the other officers looked on in confusion.

"Captain we should take this in private to, captain?" Erina said trying to get Yurika's attention. The captain again slipping into a deep thought hadn't heard much if anything of what Megumi or Ruri had said. "Yurika snap out of it!" Erina yelled exasperated.

Erina went on to yell at Yurika and pull the absent minded woman out of the room and into a private comm. room leaving Megumi and Minato alone on the bridge, Jun was still out due to his injuries sustained during the battle where Munetake died. "She's not taking this isolation good is she?" Minato asked.

Pulling lightly on her ponytail, Megumi nodded. "I guess I can't compete with that can I?" Megumi replied in a low voice almost inaudible to Minato. Running her fingers deeper into the knot of hair over her shoulder Megumi could feel her heart clenching painfully in her chest. "Maybe I should give up, help her to get him."

Shocked at the sudden turn in Megumi's mentality and the response to her question, Minato swiveled her to face Megumi. "Is that what you think is best, to give him up?" was what she said, but her mind was thinking differently. Minato's mind said it was a good idea for Megumi to give up the man she had been fixated on. _She would have had him by now if it was meant to be._

"I don't _want_ to, but he's not talking to me, and I've been thinking a lot about how things are now. I think I love him but I can't compete with Yurika so it's just a matter of time isn't it? She'll never give up on him, even now when he's here but not really, she's waiting for him. I don't think I can do that." The cold feeling in her chest grew outward leaving her fingers chilled and fumbling with the controls. Just thinking about giving up felt so right that it scared her. Love wasn't enough sometimes. "I…I need to take a break."

Minato's heart went out to Megumi as the comm. officer got to her feet and ran from the room. She'd been down that road before and it was a lonely one. "Sorry kid," she mouthed as the door shut behind Megumi blocking Minato's line of sight. Young love was a beautiful thing, but the withering and death of that flower was an ugly and painful thing to behold and the flower that had been Megumi and Akito had lost its last petal.

Readjusting the course to avoid an approaching storm, Minato hoped the best for Megumi. So much was happening aboard the ship that it was hard to keep track of it all. When it seemed to be calming it was just in lieu of another storm.

X-X

"You have to snap out of this Ruri, yeah things are bad but you can't just sit here all day and expect it to work itself out!" Inez said to Ruri in the confines of there shared room. While Inez looked the picture of composure, Ruri had degenerated into a disheveled mess. Her hair was unkempt and knotted, her eyes sunken with large black blotches, and even her skin appeared dirty and sick like spoiled tallow. "Killing yourself in this room won't fix anything."

Rolling over on her bed to face the wall, Ruri didn't care what Inez said. She was sick of everything now, didn't care if she was fated to disappear and if asked at that moment would have said she'd welcome it. The knowledge of her betrayal of not only Akito but her own feelings never left her. It was a black shawl that was wrapped around her, draining the will to do anything. "Go way Inez," she said weakly.

Her lips drew together tight forming a thin line on her face as she looked down at Ruri, disgusted. "Get over this already Ruri, it hurts now yes, but have you tried talking to him? Have you tried seeing past your own pain for a minute? Yes things are bad but it's not the end of the world for Kami-sama's sake!" Inez had grown tired of the self imposed punishment Ruri was administering. "I thought you were stronger than this."

"Well I'm not!" Ruri expounded as she rolled back over and got to her feet. Sadness and bitterness boiled over into anger at Inez's constant nagging. "I'm not that strong ok, are you happy now? And what do I tell him now huh? Well yes Akito I said I loved you then said I didn't but you know what I really do but keep it a secret ok? I just don't care anymore, I hope that the young me doesn't ask Akito to go with her to Peaceland, doesn't write about it in her log so Omaikane to find, and I hope she hates Akito. Don't you see Inez! Don't you get it!"

Unlike what Ruri suspected, Inez wasn't angry at that moment, in fact the smile on her face was genuine. She had finally got Ruri to do something other than mope. "No Ruri I don't get it because you haven't told me what to look for, what to expect. You've just been wallowing in your own misery for the last two weeks. I've just saw you lay there and cry and act like some spoiled child who had her toy taken away."

Ruri's fingers balled into fists, astonished by Inez's cutting remarks. "Well then, _doctor_," the word was infused with as much animosity as possible, "I'll tell you. When this happened to me, when Akito took me to Peaceland, it was the first time I saw him as something other than a brother figure. I wrote about that in my logs, Omaikane saw them and wrote a song for me to sing at the 'Miss Nadesico' talent show, and track down the location of Akito's orphanage where I was teleported to a week later. I'm running out of time and I'm glad, I want to die right about now. I've hurt him so much Inez, hurt him so much that I can't stand to look at myself. I used his feelings like a yoyo. Pushing him away and drawing him in to fit my needs. Well what about his huh? What about him? For all I've seen of him this last two weeks he's been miserable and won't talk to me!"

Inez didn't look impressed, even a little bored at Ruri's dialogue. "Are you finished now? All this 'oh poor me' stuff is running on my last nerve Ruri. You have to options here. Just two. You can either give up and jettison your body now out an airlock or you can fight. Anybody can be made to understand Ruri, anybody. But you can't expect anything if you don't try it. I'm not sure if the damage done between you and Akito can be fully repaired but you can try right? So what do you do, and remember if you're younger self does go back in time and you did nothing, you'll still be left with nothing."

Ruri's eyes widened at that thought. She'd never considered what she'd do if her younger self went back yet she had nothing left to live for. She had always pictured Akito with her in that event, not just her alone. "I-I…don't know if I can face him right now Inez. Could you…talk to him for me first?" as the words left her mouth, those weak and desperate words so close to begging, Ruri felt sick. It was bile leaving her throat and yet she couldn't stop herself, "you have to help me."

It wasn't what Inez wanted, she wanted Ruri to stand up for herself again, regain her lost confidence. "I'll try Ruri, but I'm just going to let him know that you want to talk to him. I'm not going to explain things to him. That's your job." As much as Inez loved Ruri, it was hard for her to accept what had just happened. Ruri had become so weak after Akito and her return from the moon. "Clean yourself up and get something to eat while I'm gone ok. You look like a mess," Inez smiled.

"I do don't I?" Ruri looked down at her dirty cloths and sickly complexion. Thinking beyond her own internal pain for the first time in weeks, Ruri was more upset with herself than ever before. As Inez walked through the door, Ruri let out one last, "thanks." She wasn't sure if Inez heard her or not, but it didn't matter. Inez had succeeded in breaking the shell of isolation she'd wrapped herself in, and now it was up to her to make her own way.

X-X

It didn't take Inez long to find Akito, not knowing the man as she did. She found him as he walked out of the cafeteria kitchen as his shift ended. Even with his problems, Akito wouldn't skirt his duties on others. "Tenkawa-kun a moment of you time if you would?" she asked coming up behind him.

Freezing at the sound of the familiar voice, Akito's body tensed and readied to run. He wasn't ready yet for this. Sure he'd talked to Ryoko for a long time after his small break down and she helped him realize hiding from the issue wouldn't make it go away, but to face it so soon? "Inez, what can I do for you?" he replied tersely.

"Oh don't be coy Akito, I'm sure you know what I'm here for," Inez said coyly. Both of them could read each other well enough to see beyond the surface of there meeting. It was about Ruri and him. "Shall we go to one of the VR rooms for some privacy?" Akito couldn't be sure but he was almost sure their was a playful hint to Inez's voice and her eyes shined with a dangerous light. Passer-by's heard them and went off to spread the rumors of the illicit meeting.

Struggling to keep his hormones under control, knowing she was playing with him, Akito chose to play along with her. If those watching them wanted to go tell everybody else why not make it a big show. Extending his elbow to Inez, she linked her arm with his and the two walked to the rec-rooms. "So how is he doing?" Akito asked as he felt his heart rate increase. He cursed his feelings, cursed how just the thought of that woman still affected him. He should hate her for what she did, so why didn't he?

Not one to often be in the situation she was in, Inez was quite enjoying the warmth of the body next to hers. Unconsciously stepping in closer she was a trifle off her game. "Good, well not really but making progress towards it. But we should wait until we start our date before talking about it ok?" How was he so calm about this? Wasn't he supposed to be as much a wreck as Ruri had been? Inez felt a twinge of resentment for Akito's apparent calm.

Opening the VR-room and letting Inez enter first, Akito sealed the door and removed his arm from her embrace. "I'm surprised it took you so long to contact me Inez-san, I had figured either you or Ruri would have come to talk to me sooner." Akito was no fool and as Inez and Ruri were living together and compatriots in the lie, they'd surely try to insure he not break their confidence.

Lowering the lights to a low dim, Inez moved close to Akito and spoke in hushed tones. "We have our reasons for this Akito, you have to trust us. Ruri never meant to hurt you on the moon, or keep her survival a secret but you have to trust us." Inez couldn't see how he could though. All they offered him was assurances with no backing, requests with no reward.

Inez had never seen such a detached look on anybodies face before as she saw on Akito's at that moment. He didn't seem to be wholly there, as if part of him had just puffed out like a candle flame in a breeze. "I'm sure she did, I'm sure you did. And I have my reasons for not wanting to deal with her anymore. We all have our reasons."

"You can't mean that Akito-kun, it's not Ruri's fault what happened to her or why she needs to have such secrecy now," Inez started but the words lacked any power. How could she expect him to understand without proof? Words have no real power save to explain, but what good is an explanation with no backing. "Give her time to sort things out ok?"

Inez's request felt hallow, shallow. "Inez-san, I'm tired of all of this. I've lost so many people in my life already, failed even more, and now you want me to give the woman that hurt me so much time to sort things out? Give her time to think if she wants to be with me only to push me away again? I couldn't handle that again." Inez could feel the bitterness in his words, smell it, taste it, and she gagged on them.

A few dry coughs escaped her mouth which was covered by her hand as she moved to a chair. "We all feel that way at times. I'm not asking you to forgive her or even love her again. I just want you to talk to her and let her say her peace and give you the chance to have yours. Sound fair?" It was a fair request, even if all he said was 'go to hell' and that was the end of it. Closure is closure even if you don't like it, and those two needed it badly.

"I'll think about it Inez, but will I be saying goodbye to her and yourself when we reach the Nergal main headquarters? I'm tired of goodbyes you see, I never get to say them to the people important to me or deserve it. Guy, Ai-chan, they never got goodbyes and they deserved them, why should I give her what she wants?" Akito's hands pulled into such tight fists that his nails broke the skin. So many innocent had died, so many that should have had more but didn't yet here he was considering talking to one he had thought lost only to find and be betrayed by. What did he owe her anyway?

Inez got to her feet and dusted off her skirt, "I never knew you were so shallow Akito, I thought better of you." Her remark got the desired result as Akito's face darkened with either sadness or regret. She smiled at that, it meant he hadn't truly meant his words, hopefully. There was still a chance for a peaceful parting of ways if the two couldn't work things out. "And I'll pass that on to her as well. Don't wait to long Akito, she really wants to talk to you."

Walking past him, she stopped and patted his shoulder sympathetically, "You've been through a lot Akito, but trust me in this when I say she's been through worse. At least give her a chance to explain. Be a better man about this and at least see her, for me if anything." She hadn't expected Akito to cover her hand with his and squeeze it softly. He said nothing but that small gesture was more than enough for Inez. Ruri would get her meeting. Walking out of the VR-room and watching Ruri's younger self walk inside of it, Inez felt good. She'd did what she said she'd do, and listening to the young girl talk Akito it seemed that things were still on track as the girl asked for her 'knight' to accompany her home.

X-X

She was waiting on the balls of her feet for the shuttle doors to open and Akito and Ruri's return from there short vacation. Yurika had been beside herself with how to respond to the changed Akito, but no longer. She'd seen his smiling face as he took Ruri off to Peaceland and knew he was still the Akito she loved. She'd wait for him forever if she had to, but just waiting wasn't her style. So when the door did open and a slightly bruised yet happy Akito walked out laden with packages and an equally happy looking Ruri stepped out she walked up to them. "Akito-chan how was the trip did Ruri-chan have a nice visit with her parents?"

Depositing the crews presents onto a waiting gurney, Akito turned to Ruri. "I'll have these taken care of, why don't you go get some good food ok?" He rubbed the top of her head affectionately eliciting a blush from the young girl who was rendered mute as she ran off. Turning back to Yurika who had only a marginal miffed look and said, "It was a unique visit to say the least Yurika."

"Well as long as you didn't get hurt then its alright." Taking Akito's hand in hers, Yurika lead the startled man down one of the many corridors of the Nadesico, opting to talk to him about private matters in private. "Akito, about the moon and your boson jumping, and how you're feeling…" Yurika paused to carefully choose her next words, "I want you to tell me if something's wrong. I don't secrets between us."

Since when did they have a solid relationship, Akito thought? Sure he felt something for the oddly brilliant captain, but was it worth the pain? Akito opened his mouth to speak but stopped. Looking deeply in Yurika's glistening blue eyes as she stood ever closer to him, feeling her breath against his face, and drinking in her emotions Akito wasn't sure he wanted to blow her off this time as something seemed different. He desperately needed somebody in his life, if only to add stability. "Yurika, it was a misunderstanding between Nakushita and me. It was hard for me to accept and then the whole Jovian thing. I was just…lost I guess."

Yurika stepped even closer to Akito, only a foot away, her smile while smaller than usual somehow seemed more real to him. "It's ok Akito, its ok." Moving the hand she still held up to her cheek, Yurika could feel such an intense heat radiating out of it through his glove. A small fire against her cheek, she loved it. "Akito, I've told you this before but I don't think you really believed it. But I love you Akito, I truly do. We haven't had a chance to talk much since the battle on Earth. I was scared to death that you might have been taken from me without you really knowing it. Tell me Akito, do you trust me, do you believe me."

How such simple words spoken in such a demure tone could penetrate him was unthinkable. It had been as if she'd yelled it in a microphone against his head, the words still echoed in his mind. She was not lying, embellishing, or even exaggerating in the slightest. The woman holding his hand loved him. He wanted to respond to her, to do what she wanted and accept her feelings, not respond to them, just accept the fact she loved him but his voice was locked tight. His lips moved but no words left them.

Gazing deeply into his brown eyes Yurika could see the understanding forming, the acceptance she craved. Hearts and thoughts fade in time for most, but for her, the heart she'd given to the deadpan youth on Mars had yet to dwindle. It was etched in stone. Her smile dwindled more, but it wasn't in sadness or even fear, she was far happier than she'd ever been. No her smile faded as her lips moved against his in sudden and brief kiss. A mere pressing of them together, feather light, but enough for her to know he'd eaten Italian food.

Akito didn't say anything else, he just took Yurika's hand back in his and nodded softly. The two of them silently walked down the hall and towards the cafeteria where they'd share a meal with the young Hoshino, had anybody not known them they'd appear a family sharing a meal together. Sitting in the back of the cafeteria the adult Ruri saw it and had she not expected it would have cried. But that Ruri knew that you can only hurt somebody so much, play with their emotions so long before they start to look elsewhere.

Ruri laughed inside her mask at the shear irony of her life. Her song, the song she'd sang about her feelings about Akito. _What would I do if I'd know you before everybody else, if I was your number one? Well I'd hurt you and drive you to somebody else._ She thought as she threw her leftovers away, more than half the Mars Bowl. Sure Akito and Yurika were just eating a meal together but Ruri could see the look on Yurika's face, hell she saw it on her own many times before in the mirror on Mars. A look of determination and ownership. Yurika planned on making Akito hers and Ruri didn't know if the man could resist her.

Humans seek love and acceptance to ease the troubles of their lives. Ruri thrust a bevy of pain and loneliness into Akito's life and Yurika seemed willing to remedy that. Heading back to her room, Ruri didn't bother checking the computer logs if her younger self made an entry about her experiences with Akito. As much as she wanted to doubt they'd be there, she knew they would be if only to spite her. _She may end up with him, but I care more about him than she could._

A chime on her door prompted her to put the helmet back on and answer her door. Who was standing behind it wasn't anybody she would have expected but seemed unduly pleased. "Miss Hoshino what a pleasure to meet you under these situations," Erina Wong said as she stepped into the room. "I believe you and I have much to discuss."

X-X

Author notes

I know it looks a little depressing right now but give me time. I have things in mind and I'm sure you'll be happy with the outcome. If you think Akito is being cruel or out of character again I believe I'm portraying him in a more human light. He believed the woman he cared for had died only to find out she was alive and hiding from him, then after he's lead to believe they're together again she tells him she doesn't want that. I'd think such a result would be a very hurt and vulnerable man, and when at our weakest don't we turn to others for support. And what better support than from somebody that was a close friend like Yurika?

Feel free to disagree but I think this is more realistic. But don't worry yet, Ruri isn't out yet and as the curtain draws closed I've more planned that you'll like. Trust me

Ja Mata

Zentrodie(zentrodie-at-secondimpact-dot-com)


	20. Sometimes the hardest thing is

Standard disclaimer

In lieu of putting Anata back on my writing rotation I've opted to head towards its completion. It's so close that I want to give it all my attention until its finished. So look out Mars here we come.

X-X

Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai

Chapter 20 – Sometimes the hardest thing to say is…

How things had gotten so out of control so fast was a mystery to Ruri and Inez. One moment their major concern was the likelihood of Ruri's survival and for Inez keeping her ward from spiraling into depression. Now however three days after Akito and the younger Hoshino ventured off for a small vacation in Peace Land, the two of them were seated in there room with a third party. "Now Miss Wong can you please just get to the point about why you're here harassing my subordinate?" Inez asked while gesturing to Ruri.

Erina's eyebrow rose slightly as her lips curled up in a tight grin, "Right to the point, I like that about you Fressange." Leaning back in the simple metal backed chair that she had been provided, Erina felt her back pop out of place. Sliding several documents across the table for the two's inspection Erina had to fight back her elation. She was in control here, she had the power. "You see Miss Hoshino we've been looking for you for some time now. And what I want is information that I think you can provide for me."

Her problems with Akito temporarily forgotten in light of a greater threat, Ruri thumbed through Erina's files. Photos of her outside her suit from the Nadesico's jump from Mars to Earth space, dual sign-ons for Omoikane's higher operating systems, and numerous other small slips and mistakes both Inez and she had. It was all very telling but not enough to link her as 'being' Ruri Hoshino. "And this is supposed to do what? Scare me, anger me, make me do your biddings? I don't see anything that would prove I have any information for you or why you're calling me the name of that kid on the bridge," Ruri responded dropping the files back on the table.

Recollecting the photos and papers, arranging them neatly and putting them all back in the folder they had been brought in, Erina drummed her fingers over the manila folder. "If this alone was all I had all I would be doing would be to kill you and Inez for being a security breech. Illegal hacking of Nergal property, lying to a military panel, and stealing private information are all punishable with extreme prejudice you see." Erina was upset when the two women across from her showed no signs of being intimidated. She continued, "But what I do have, and what was the final piece to the puzzle, was this."

Erina pulled a small disk out of her belt pack and tossed it to Ruri. "What's this supposed to be, more doctored evidence to prove some fantasy plot of yours that I'm some sort of time traveler?" Ruri's voice warbled slightly and it pained her to realize how frightened she was. She was trying her best to keep her hands and voice steady, to show no fear, but she was on the verge of cracking. What Erina could do to her if she was found out was easily one of her worst nightmares.

"Just play it Naka, we'll deal with Miss Wong's delusions after we see her 'pieces." Inez put a comforting hand on Ruri's shoulder. Unlike Ruri, Inez was in complete control of her fear and it robbed Erina of having sum control of the discussion. _We were careless and now we'll have to face the consequences._ Rubbing her fingers against her thumb, her only nervous tick, Inez watched the video feed play. It was from the moon, an unseen at the time security camera. Inez watched and felt the numbness in her chest expand and encompass her whole body.

The coldness in both women was intensified as they watched Akito call out to Ruri in shock and amazement as the artificial respirator was smashed revealing her identity. Ruri felt her stomach lurch and had to fight back the bile. They were caught, and it was Akito that gave them away. Trying to find a more comfortable position in her chair, Erina hunched over. "Yes it seems that Tenkawa-kun has been somewhat important to you Ruri. We didn't know he had a past with you and well after we viewed this we did some digging in his past looking for ties to you." Ruri covered her mouth as it dropped open, they had gone that far back? "It seems you know what we've found. Nergal never did find that hacker back then did they, well let me be the one to say 'gotcha ya.'

Inez watched as Ruri's head dropped and her arms folded inward, she watched as Ruri was defeated. The hope, plan, or even need to cling to the belief she could have kept herself hidden torn from her and used to slap her in the face. Inez watched this and the fear in her was burnt away in a blaze of hatred. The room almost seemed to bleed away as she focused every nuance of her will on Erina, "So get to it. What does Nergal's favorite little pump want with us? A way out of whatever manager's bed you've been warming maybe? How about we cut this little game short and you just come out with it already!"

Clenching her hands tight at her side, Erina heard her knuckles crack. How dare that bitch say such things, she wasn't happy with how she had to be used in order to stay afloat in her career but it had to be done. "You're going to tell me everything you know about Boson Jumping. How it works, how you are what you are, and maybe if you don't piss with me anymore I won't be watching as your lifeless corpse is dumped out an airlock." Erina yelled in the small room. Her breath hot and humid washed across Inez's face. "I'll give you two weeks to write your report and if its not acceptable I guess we could always use you as a test rat, something I think you know a lot about already. You were basically engineered and not raised right Hoshino?"

Inez was on her feet in moments, her hands gripping the table edge painfully as she thrust it aside. A resounding crash as the small circular table bounced off the ground sending papers, disks, and an assortment of other possessions scattered about. "Get the hell out of here now!"

Erina had been to her feet as soon as Inez's small rage exploded. Breathing heavily while trying to keep her body from fleeing, she could feel her heart beating in her throat. Her voice came out in small patches, "I'll…see you in two weeks…I suggest you play along." She attempted to keep her composure as she left the room, _running away_, and headed to bridge to see what that insipid captain was doing now.

Back in the severely redecorated room, Inez hid her face behind her hands. She had just made things much worse. Shame was etched on her features, as why she hid it from Ruri. Why had she let Erina's words get to her, not kept herself under better control? Now Erina would be harder to deal with, to manipulate as the woman would be on edge around them. Drawing in several deep breaths to calm her rattled nerves, Inez turned to Ruri. "Guess we've our work cut out for us don't we."

Slowly turning to look at Inez, Ruri's eyes large and vacant held little life in them. "Yeah, lot of work," she parroted in flat robotic tones. Moving on its own, her body started to clean the room while Inez left the room to collect herself. "What's it matter anyway?" Ruri asked herself as she dropped the papers in her hand back to the ground. Sitting on her bed she quickly felt depression sinking back in as she lay down and let sleep take her. As she slumbered she missed Akito's call and asked her to meet him later so they could have their talk.

X-X

With an extra bounce in her step, Yurika and Akito walked down the corridors of the Nadesico together. While her progress with Akito had been favorable she was still upset that she couldn't yet call him hers. "So what do you think Akito-chan?" she asked after taping yet another poster to the wall.

His face light up with a smile, "I think you're crazy Yurika, but then again it fits you." His comment was met with Yurika puffing her cheeks out in fake anger, her eyes betrayed her as they were nothing but adoring. Turning his full attention to the poster again, "But are you sure you want to have a beauty contest with being the captain as the prize?" Akito couldn't follow Yurika's plans sometimes, she to was a genius in the truest sense.

"Be the captain? But it's only for a day. See." Yurika pointed to the poster where there should have been a disclaimer about the length of time the winner would be captain. Finding thing her finger number fell down. "But I was…I put it…" Turning back to Akito with watery eyes Yurika milked the wounded look as much as she could, Akito always caved in for it she found.

She was right as Akito quickly set to cheering up his friend. "Don't worry I'm sure you'll win," he offered. Yurika's eyes dried as she cooed and wrapped her arm around his, nuzzling his arm with her cheek. Arms interlaced the pair continued down the hall stopping every so often to put another poster up. With Yurika on his side, Akito felt oddly good. For a short time he was afraid he was using the captain as a way of distancing himself from the pain he felt from Ruri's betrayal. But as time passed he grew to understand that his feelings for Yurika were genuine. If they were love he didn't know yet but he did like her, like her a lot.

The pairs talk of general happenstance and goings on shifted suddenly as the last of the posters was adorning the wall. A few minutes of silence had been shared comfortably between them but as they stood outside of Akito's room, Yurika couldn't hold her tongue. "Have you given any thought to what we talked about the other day Akito-chan?" the softness of her voice had the young man off his game. Where usually Yurika was so animated and boisterous, this question was meek, subtle, and oh so dangerous.

While they had talked of many things, ranging from outrageous to very pleasing to him, Akito knew exactly what Yurika was asking. She'd asked him to quit being a pilot and become cook full time. She as him to let Nakushita take over for him. His finger stalled over the open button to his door. "Yurika I did think about it, a lot." He saw the expectation, the hope on her face. "I'd like to do that," Yurika's heart lurched in her chest, thundered in her head, she was so close to her dream. "But it wouldn't be fare. I want to protect the ship, to protect you. I'm not sure I trust Nakushita to keep us, to keep you safe." Seeing the mournful understanding on Yurika's face, Akito didn't like it, didn't like seeing her hurt at all. Taking her hand in his he squeezed it softly, "I want to keep you safe because I care about you."

Her face was smiling but her mind was storming. Yurika was always aware of Akito's carefully used words. He'd say care, like, worried, and a host of other words that were so close to love but not the same. Why wouldn't he let down the walls around himself and let her in. "I understand Akito, and you're right. It's selfish of us to not think of the others. But what about us though? Aren't we entitled to a little happiness of our own?" A wicked yet fully enjoyable idea came to her mind. Keeping a tight grip on his hand, Yurika moved where his hand had stalled and opened his door. Pulling the confused man into his darkened room, Yurika led him to his bed and sat on it with him.

"Yurika what are you doing?" the hitch in his voice alerted Yurika to his nervousness. Moving the hand she held to her cheek, she again marveled at the heat it generated and the size of it compared to hers, dwarfed hers. "Y-Yurika?"

Inching closer to him, her legs now pressed against his as they dangled over the edge of the bed, Yurika looked in Akito's eyes. Looked for anything she could find be it love, fear, lust, or even disgust. _I love this man_. She let go of his hand and was happy that he didn't move it. "I've been patient Akito, ever since you came on board I've been waiting for you. I've seen you go from depressed to happy and back many times and I wanted to be there for you, like this."

Akito opened his mouth to speak but she stopped him. His hand moved away from her and the coldness set back in. "Let me be here for you Akito. I've told you already and I think you finally believe me when I say I have feelings for you. But you…" She looked away from him, looked to her interlaced fingers on her lap. All her life she'd needed an anchor, something to keep her going through all the hardships. Her training, the prejudice she had to endure from her heritage, the abuse she had to face because of her sex, and the resentment inherited from her family line. Though it all she kept going back to her early memories of times before the hardships. In those memories was the boy turned man before her. The dreams she had of him, of her with him, of happiness outside of a military uniform.

Summing up her courage into herself she looked back at him and saw the questioning look on his face. That goofy unknowing face of his that she'd fallen for, "Tell me Akito. I know you do, maybe not as much as I for you but tell me now. Do you love me?" Her hushed words floated around the room like a cloud.

Yurika was right, and Akito knew it. He did harbor strong feelings for her yet he danced around it. Tried not to face it or acknowledge it. To give in to Yurika's demand meant to abandon his feelings for Ruri. Could he do that? The vision of Ruri saying how mistaken she had been to sleep with him came back, and Akito knew his answer. "I do."

Tears? Why was she crying? Yurika couldn't venture a guess as to why she'd started crying, she didn't know she was. Weight that had been on her for ages it seemed fell of, she was almost positive she heard their metallic clang on Akito's floor. Throwing her arms around his waist she cried against him. She felt his hand running in circles along her back, stroking her hair and rocking back and forth slowly. All she remembered was that she was repeating in voiceless words, 'Thank you.'

X-X

He couldn't place the feeling he was having, but Akito knew it was a positive one. After Yurika calmed down and cleaned herself up she realized she had bridge duty to attend to. While reluctant to head off so soon after hearing what she'd waited years for, she wasn't about to place her own happiness above the lives of her crew. With nothing else to do but think about the current shift in his life, Akito headed to the mess hall for an early lunch. While picking at his food he couldn't fight off the gnawing feeling though. _Why can't I be just let her go and be happy with Yurika?_

The girl of his past had been brought back to his mind as her younger namesake walked in. "Ruri-cha, care to eat some lunch with me?" The time spent with her in Peace Land and the subsequent journey to her school had brought the pair closer together. Akito wasn't about to push her aside just because of the resemblance she shared with the girl he grew up with. Seeing hesitation on the child's face, Akito raised his hands, "No funny stuff, just wouldn't mind having some intelligent conversation over lunch. Just don't go over my head."

His statement whether it was meant as a joke or rueful stating of facts elicited a smile a light blush from the computer operator. "I will join you Tenkawa-san then." Grabbing a Mars bowl, she'd always get one when eating with Akito as he recommended it, she sat by the man. "You are looking happier than usual Tenkawa-san, has something good happened?"

Rubbing his chin, Akito chuckled, "Am I that easy to read? Well I guess you could say something good has happened, but I won't bore you with it. How about you things going well for our ships most gifted computer hacker?" Knowing so little about computers himself, it wasn't hard for Akito to state that the girl by him was vastly superior in there use. However being as smitten with Akito as she was, Ruri fumbled over her words.

"I needed to leave the bridge as the other helmswomen have been badgering me over my reluctance to enter the 'Miss Nadesico' competition." Ruri's brow furrowed in irritation and frustration. Why Minato and Megumi were so insistent she enter the captain's foolish pageant was unfathomable to her. _It is not like I could truly compete, though…_ Taking Akito in with her eyes she wondered how he would see her if she entered.

Eating a few bites of his own lunch, Akito thought of what Ruri had said. "Why don't you enter Ruri? It might be fun and you never know, you might end up as the captain." He added a wink at the end to brighten up the dower child's disposition. She always looked so sad and alone to him, like his Ruri did he remembered back on Mars. "It couldn't hurt and you'd have an excuse to take some time off. You work harder than most people on the ship."

_He thinks I could win._ Her mind was a daze, foggy and clouded as possibilities and hopes ran rampart and battled with common sense and better judgment. She knew she was a child and he a grown man, but she could have hope right? Nothing was wrong with hoping. "I will think about it Tenkawa-san. You have many valid points." The two's conversation lulled into pointless small talk, but talking to one another each felt the confusion and oddness of their lives fade slightly, the important things less prominent.

Taking in the last of his meal, Akito stood. "Well I better get to the hanger and get some training in or Ryoko will never let me hear the end of it." Walking around the table and patting Ruri affectionately, "Take care now Ruri ok?" Her blazing cheeks went unnoticed by the pilot as her hair masked her face as he walked away. Watching him leave, Ruri was struck with an odd notion, one that she didn't know if was a good feeling or a bad one.

_How would things have been if we were the same age…if we were together before you met the others. _Shaking such a foolish idea out of her mind, Ruri bussed her tray and headed back to the bridge only one word was spoken as she took her seat, "Baka."

X-X

"So how did the visit go Erina?" Akatsuki asked in the smug tone that send chills down Erina's spine. The fact that he came walking into her room unannounced hadn't been ignored either, but what could she do?

Wanting a shower badly, Erina needed to get her boss out of her room. _He's not here for just information._ Another chill, her neck hairs started to raise as she could almost smell the testosterone flowing out of the man. "I gave the two of them two weeks to comply and make a full report about everything they know. Added in a little threat so I'm sure they'll fold." She could feel his eyes on her, she unconsciously pulled her cloths a little closer to her body.

Walking further into Erina's room, taking in the sights of what little decorations she had. "Glad to hear it. Don't know though if I buy the full story you have, but I'll take what I can." His statement took on a double meaning as he looked her up and down and his grin widened. Since the captain wasn't biting he'd have to find another pole to scratch. "What do you think about the captain's little game?"

Through clenched teeth Erina said, "That stupid 'Miss Nadesico' thing? Well it could be a way to wrest control of the ship without needed to pull a full assault force in. We're going to have to sequester the crew if not detain them eventually for their knowledge of the Jovians." It wasn't something that sat right with Erina but the rest of the Nergal board as well as top ranking UN Spacy command that the fact that the Jovian's were human be kept at all costs.

Letting out a throaty laugh, Negara lapped his knee playfully, "You think you could beat her at her own game? Sorry Erina but I see that young Hoshino girl beating you before I see you winning out over our dear Misumaru." Yes Erina was attractive but with her connections among the crew being what they were, Akatsuki would have been shocked if they didn't vote her dead last. Wiping the tear out of his eye, "Seriously though we will be needed to attend to the crew soon however. We'll let things play out a little more, maybe if you use that fact against our two little connivers you'll get more out of them."

He had a point, a good point. With what she knew about the older Hoshino, Erina could tell something passed between Akito and her. Something she easily could use to get more compliance from them. _When did I get so dirty?_ Slapping her face lightly to rid herself of guilt, Erina had to do what she did. _Lie, cheat, steal, and sleep your way to success?_ "No," she said under her breath. She didn't like the person she'd become but to change now would put her life in jeopardy. "Was there anything else that you needed?" She hoped not.

"Just one last thing Erina," Akatsuki said as he walked to her door and locked it and walked back. The revulsion didn't leave Erina's skin until long after Akatsuki had left and she was well into her second shower. _Is power worth this degradation?_ Erina didn't know that answer, and hated the other women aboard the Nadesico a little more because of it. Because her life choices led her to this place, these people, and this feeling. "Maybe…maybe I'm wrong about this…maybe I should help them instead."

But how, and who?

X-X

"You said you wanted to talk Ruri. I'm here so let's talk." Akito didn't want to sound as ruff as he did, but found it hard to when he was called in the middle of the night to head to one of the VR-rooms. From her body language Akito could tell she was apprehensive yet determined. He had to get proficient at reading her that way as she wasn't one to express herself vocally.

She didn't really know what to say or how to go about saying it, all she wanted was to salvage some of what they had. "I wanted to apologize Akito. I've hurt you so much with my secrets and lies. I just…wanted to tell you I'm sorry." Her head hung low, the new mask in her hands.

He wanted to be angry at her, to yell, scream, to hit her, anything but forgive her. But he couldn't do those things. Seeing her standing before him, just as confused and afraid as he was inside, remembering the good times they'd shared. "Ruri how can you ask me that. How can I trust you knowing what I do now? You lied to me for over a year. I cried on your shoulder over your 'death.' Then on the moon…you said you loved me Ruri. We…we made love and then…" He trailed off unable to continue speaking.

With each accusation Ruri shank back further and further into her mental shell. He was right and she knew it. People can only take so much before they learn, or change. "I had to Akito. Things are complex for me, I'm sorry for lying to you. Sorry for what happened on the moon." But she wasn't. It was a dream now to her and it seemed very far off. She'd have taken him right then if he'd have her but knew better than to offer.

Slamming his fist into the wall, his mind unable to express the anger and frustration any other way, Akito yelled. "Then tell me about it. Oh wait I asked you that already but you can't answer. I'm just supposed to trust you on blind faith after you played with my heart like a yo-yo?" Ruri stepped closer to him at seeing the blood on the wall, he'd broke the skin of his knuckles against the wall. But he waved his hand angrily at her, forcing her off. "It's fine."

_Just say it, a moment's courage._ She willed herself to act. With an unknown amount of time left to live Ruri was not going to live it in regret. What she really wanted to tell him wasn't an apology, it was the truth. Not a full truth but what truth she could afford. "Akito…back on the moon…I lied."

"Yeah I know you lied, you said you lo…" Akito turned and said, he was cut off by an unexpected presence against him, Ruri. Ruri's lips to be more precise, she was kissing him almost forcefully. Bewildered by her sudden change in action, Akito pushed her away from him, "What are you doing?"

"Baka! Did our time mean so little to you, did you not trust me at all anymore," Ruri said as tears started to flow again. She'd been crying a lot since she'd lied to Akito on the moon, she hated it as it showed how weak she'd become. "I lied about saying it was a mistake! I love you Akito Tenkawa you damn pig headed idiot!" She rushed up to the dumbfounded man and started beating on this chest. "I didn't want to hurt you, don't want to, but I have to! HAVE TO!" She screamed in his face and wet his shirt with her tears.

His hands moved to hug her, stopped, closed in, pulled away, finally he hugged her as her punches lost power. "Ruri?" asked softly? _Don't trust her, it's another lie._ He wanted to think that, to believe it was all just a ploy to get him to do what she wanted again. Another lie would be easy to believe, but his nature prevented it. And he wanted to believe her, no matter how he tried to demonize her, to hate her, he just couldn't.

"Don't talk right now…just hold me," she sniffed back the mucus running down her nose, "just hold me." She knew he would, it was how he was. _You're using him again._ She shut the voice in her head up instantly. She needed comfort and he was all the comfort she could get, needed. She'd seen him and Yurika so many times together since her younger self went to her home, and each time she'd felt her heart ache, a nail driven into the soft tissue.

Unsure what to believe in, Akito did as Ruri asked. He didn't say a word and just held the sniffling woman. Just as he was about to move on passed their relationship she had to do this he thought bitterly. It wasn't fair to him, to Yurika, or even herself but Ruri had done it anyway. _But isn't it what you wanted? Her in your arms again. _He didn't know anymore, part of him loved her and would always but was it enough to forgive her for all the pain and lies? Time would tell he guessed, but for now at least he could hope for a friendship again.

X-X

"I'll tell you one thing, Omaikane sure can write a song can't it?" Inez said from her chair. Leaning over and pushing the off switch, the screen that had just played the 'Miss Nadesico' pageant had just ended. Turning to give Ruri her full attention, Inez was perplexed by the sudden change in temperament her ward was having. "I take it something goods happened aside reliving your glory days as an idol singer?"

With all the problems aboard the ship with Erina, her love life, and the fear of death Ruri couldn't see them right now. "Yes things are good. Well better. I never told you about my talk with Akito did you?" Ruri said while running her fingers through her hair.

"Didn't that happen last week sometime? And no you never did, but with all the work you've been doing on the Aestavalis and my research I guess we haven't had much time to talk lately." Inez said after a few moments of reflecting on the last week of Boson Jump research.

Taking out the pair of rings she'd received from her surrogate mother, Ruri felt the metal warm in her palm. "We made some amends. I told him the truth of about a few things. God you'd have been so disappointed in how I acted during our talk." She said almost bashfully and giggled at the end.

Smirking Inez could put two and two together. "You cried like the little girl you are and declared your undying love for him didn't you." When Ruri's eyes widened and her jaw dropped, Inez started laughing. "Wow and here I was taking a shot in the dark. Quite the flare for the dramatic you have going Ruri. So how are things then?" She didn't want to say it but Inez couldn't accept that Akito would be as forgiving as it seemed.

"Well not a lot happened mind you, I might have over exaggerated that part. But he seems to have forgiven me and he's been helping train me again." Inez nodded and let out a voiceless 'aah.' It explained why Ruri had been more animated about her training sessions, and even attending them for what it was worth. "Its like we got a fresh start. Friends again and as we just watched I'm still looking good here."

Pointing to the blank screen Inez shook her head, "No she was looking good, you're just hoping things are going to get better. Can't blame you but don't get them too high Ruri. Rumors are flying that Akito and Yurika are getting real chummy lately." Not liking to be the barer of bad news, Inez hated watching the small smile on Ruri's face vanish at the sound of Yurika's name.

Looking down at her feet then back at Inez several times, Ruri debated on if she wanted to respond or not to that comment. Making her choice, Ruri opted to speak her mind. "You think I don't know that Inez? I've seen them together and if our captain is any indicator she's about to burst with happiness. But you said it yourself. I have to live my life and if I don't die during the tests I still have to face him…her…us. I have to try something or what's the point?"

Inez then did something that Ruri hadn't expected after her rant. She clapped, and not sarcastically. "Glad to hear it kid. I was worried for a while that if things didn't go right for you two, you'd end up some after school special about suicide and unhealthy relationships." The scientist had no problem believing that love was great but it could be destructive too, and she had seen it at work on both Ruri and Akito. "I wish you luck Ruri and for better or worse we're going to find out soon about you. I bet my work on Boson Jumping is going to have Erina itching for some tests. Good thing is I'd have had this done without your help anyway so we can just fake your involvement."

"Thanks for everything Inez, I mean it," Ruri said downcast. The woman had been imperative to Ruri's survival and plans. Inez had kept her secret at personal risk, never asked her to betray secrets of things she couldn't say, and was a great confidant. "I'm going to get some sleep. Things are going to be hectic soon and I don't want to be caught unprepared for it."

"You do that Ruri, goodnight," Inez followed Ruri until she rounded the corner to the sleeping space and turned the light off. Inez prayed that if a God did exist he gave Ruri a chance to live through this. Erina was soon to be appeased and with it the event that would either save or destroy Ruri would occur. After that, well it was in the hands of God if Ruri and Akito could salvage their relationship of any sort. So many factors were against her on many levels, but Inez had faith in one thing. Not God or machine but in Ruri. She'd watched the girl face hardships unthought-of by sane men. _And she'll face this one with a clear head, I can do that much for her._

It was a long while before Inez joined Ruri in sleep.

X-X

Author Notes

Another chapter and this thing is going to be over. A few places in this chapter were a little rough in my opinion but I couldn't see it happening anyway else. The Akito/Yurika talk was one such scene but I can't see Yurika being any other way. Well hope you liked this chapter and look forward to the conclusion.

I've made a lot of mistakes along the way of creating this story. But I've grown as an author too. Looking back at the first two chapters I wonder how it was possible for me to make such progress, I hope you see it too and enjoy what I create and look forward to more.

Thanks to all of you for reading and taking this trip with me. Its been a blast.

Ja Mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie-at-secondimpact-dot-com)


	21. A simple experiment Redeux

Anata No Ichiban Ni Naritai

Chapter 21 – A simple experiment – re deux

Resting her chin on her palm, Erina thumbed through Inez's report about boson jumping. While she had been hoping for a more detailed accounting of how to perform the technique Erina had to accept what she was presented with. It was detailed enough that she knew the two women weren't lying or covering up for anything, but it was frustrating. "Guess we just have to use Tenkawa," she murmured. Just thinking about how to get Yurika to allow her to use that man as a test subject was going to give her a migraine.

But if she could get Akito to want to do the test, "Then that floozy would have no choice but to accept it!" Erina's eyes widened as she connected the invisible dots. Yurika didn't question Akito on anything, Akito wants to do the test, and then Yurika would have to let him. It was perfect, or so she thought. In a stroke of luck or fate, the final puzzle piece in her plan walked into the galley where she had opted to review her plan. Waving over to the man who had a tray of food in his hand, "Tenkawa-kun, do you have a moment I have something I'd like to talk to you about?"

Looking between the woman and his tray of food, Akito shrugged his shoulders. Sitting across from Erina, Akito was perplexed as to what the woman could want. They hadn't spoken much aboard the ship and the only time they had spoken it was when he was forced off the ship. "What did you need me for Erina?"

Having been watching Akito since she'd seen the footage of his jump so long ago, Erina could sense a more positive air about the man, a good sign. Now did she want to use the knowledge she had about Akito's connection with Ruri or not…? In a moment of conscious she decided, "I've been talking with Inez about boson jumping lately and we've come to some conclusions. Akito," she took the hand not holding the chopsticks into her own, use every advantage. "We've developed a test that could put us on par with the Jovian's technology."

For a moment Akito respected Erina for just coming out with her request. But only a moment as he felt her thumb roving over his hand, she'd try and use that against him would she? While he wasn't in a real relation ship with either Ruri or Yurika right now he wasn't about to let Erina seduce him. Pulling his hand free, "You want me to be a guinea pig for your little test is that it? How dangerous is this test?" He had no doubt it was very dangerous but would she tell him.

She'd seen countless men and women die back at the Nergal headquarters trying variations of the test, a test with zero successful completions. It was almost suicide for anybody to accept the test. "You'll be fine Akito, you've already jumped before. We just want to document it and study the findings to make it so others can jump too." She felt part of herself die as spoke, lied, and trying to condemn a man. She wanted to stop this type of work, this deception, but with this if it succeeded she would be done with it forever!

Before Akito could open his mouth to reply a holoscreen opened in the center of the table effectively blocking the conversing pair's line of sight. It was Inez and her face was drawn and her eyes narrowed in accusation, "She's not telling the truth Akito-kun, this is a very dangerous procedure." The screen rotated and Inez and Erina were face to face, in a manner, "so is this what you wanted my research for?" Inez was torn thanks to her foreknowledge. She knew that the test was what sent Ruri into the past, but if things were wrong, if her data wasn't right then she'd be killing them both. Something could have changed, something small that she hadn't thought of and she'd be killing three people.

"You're 'research' if you can call it that, states that not only has Akito jumped from the Earth to the moon, but that he also jumped from Mars to Earth! He's the only person we can use, unless you want to provide another subject for me," Erina was sure that Inez would know who she was talking about. Sure Akito was the optimal subject having survived multiple jumps, but the older Hoshino had demonstrated at least a small percentage of Akito's abilities. And again if either of them _did_ die it wouldn't be a big loss.

A moment of panic at the most crucial event being ruined, Inez fought for words. "Jovian mecha isn't present though as it was during all of the previous jumps that Akito made. How do you plan to compensate for that, or has that even entered your mind?" Inez looked around her room for Ruri, she needed to know what she did, to make sure she wasn't damning her by talking Akito out of the tests. She found not her friend but a note. She'd have to read it later.

Sensing the tide moving in her favor, Erina pressed her weakened opponent, "We've been able to open stable jump fields before its just the subjects haven't been able to complete…the…jump." Damn she'd slipped and let it to her hopeful pilot that nobodies lived, peaking around the screen, her breath held in her chest and her eyes blinking rapidly. Nothing, he'd left during the conversation. Perfect. She could say whatever she wanted to Inez now and not care.

But Inez had signed off too, she had to read Ruri's note and find that damn girl. Where was she at such a crucial time? By Ruri's account the test, if she didn't just ruin it, should be held in less than three days! "Damn it!" Inez said in a rare showing of frustration. Unfolding Ruri's note, Inez read the few scribbled words with trembling hands.

_I'm going to leave now, if Kami-sama is willing I'll see you in four days. And don't think you can find me, the Nadesico is big enough for me to hide in._ – _Naka_

The note was crumpled and thrown at the wall as Inez fell to her knees and a lone tear left her eye as she thought of Ruri.

X-X

Ruri walked the long bland corridors of the Nadesico in a daze. Seeing the doors, computer panels, and pathways but not knowing it. Her mind was occupied with other matters of more importance. Her life, her very existence, was to be decided in a very short period of time. Why had she run from Inez, easy to spare both of them the pain of the loss if she were to die. Did she like what she did? Not at all. _Its selfish of me to run and hide from her, from him, from everything but its to hard to see them. _

Ruri stood to the side absently as Ryoko, Izumi, and Hikaru walked by her. She boisterous laughing from Hikaru as Izumi again joked about Ryoko's crush on Akito. The haze in her mind cleared as fog does once confronted with the light of the sun. "I want to see them," she muttered as she started walking towards Akito's room. Her hand stopped centimeters away from knocking on the door. Voices, two of them, were coming through the door. _Inez? She's trying to talk Akito into doing the tests._

Feeling dirty eavesdropping but unable to stop, Ruri leaned closer to the door and prayed nobody walked by to see her. Listening to Akito voice his fears about risking his life to advance Boson jumping knowledge, of being a pilot, and Inez's calming but one sided counters to his questions left Ruri stunned. Having been thinking of her life and the risks she lived with she forgot about his. He was risking his life daily and though she knew she survived the jump she truthfully didn't know if he did.

"Have I been selfish this whole time…thinking of only myself and my problems and not acknowledging the same problem in others?" she said aloud. A giggle from behind her alerted Ruri to Yurika's presence. Turning on the balls of her feet, Ruri winced as she saw the captain smiling widely at her, head tilted slightly to the left causing her hair to sway.

An unexpected pleasantry, finding Nakushita outside Akito's door Yurika thought. From the man's words, Yurika concluded he was ready to take his place on the pilots' roster. "I was here to invite Akito-chan to lunch, but if you wanted Naka-kun we could make a quick trip to the bridge and set things right if you want. You do want to be put on the pilot rotation now correct?" Yurika's hand was already pulling on Ruri's dragging the confused young woman with her.

"Captain, what do you mean? I was under the impression I wasn't to be put on the line up as Ak…Tenkawa-kun didn't think I was ready yet." Ruri lied knowing Akito believed her more than a capable pilot. Feeling the captain's hand tighten, Ruri noticed a change in the air around the woman. It was something dangerous.

Stopping outside the bridge, Yurika turned to look at Nakushita. She was done with putting Akito in danger. She knew he loved her and wasn't going to risk his life any further if she had to. "Listen Naka-kun, my Akito is done piloting in combat. I'm sorry that you have to do this, but you're the only other capable pilot and we need you to take his place." Yurika's eyes were fierce, the warmth and caring replaced with determination and determination.

So stunned at not only the decree but the sudden change in temperament Ruri just let herself be lead by Yurika to the bridge. How could she refute the woman in that? Yurika had every right to remove Akito and replace him with another suitable pilot. Akito was listed as a cook and not Aestavalis pilot after all. While the motivation was not for crew safety and purely selfish reasons, Ruri wondered if she would have done the same thing if she had been the captain. Signing her name on the pad Yurika presented herself with Ruri had to fight to suppress the laugh. _Jokes on her if I vanish in the next few days, Akito will be right back out there._

The moment the order was made official to put Ruri on the roster, Yurika's features reverted to that of the carefree if not vacant captain the crew knew so well. "Now that wasn't so hard was it?" Patting Ruri's shoulder, Yurika was overjoyed as one more problem had been dealt with. Turning around and setting the pad back down, Yurika's eyebrow twitched as she noticed an order being broken. "Ruri-chan! I told you to take a break. Go to the VR-deck or the recreation room or something. You spend too much time with the computers." Satisfied when the young child stood up, muttered something and headed off, Yurika was going to thank Nakushita again but the man had left as she wasn't paying attention to him. Well no matter he did what she wanted.

Following her younger self, Ruri watched from the relative safety of the door way as history repeated itself before her. Akito laying on the ground under the fake sunset, her younger self walking up behind him, and the talk that lead her to learn about his orphanage. Watching it now, Ruri felt a powerful hope blossom in her chest. It threatened to break the view she had on the future, threatened to make it change from 'if' she could un-mask herself forever to 'when.' She saw the admiration on her young face, the sympathetic and caring look on Akito's, she saw hope in physical form. _This could happen, it really could. I remember this almost exactly like how it just happened. I…she…we could go back in time and set the cycle._

X-X

_How can this woman be so stubborn! _Was all Inez could think as she was well into the third day of trying to convince Yurika to let Akito test the Boson jump theory she formulated. She didn't know how she'd work the young Ruri into the equation but if things got bad enough she'd just throw the child in one of the extra weapons compartments and hope for the best. "I keep telling you he'll be safe, we've seen him jump before we just want it under controlled conditions."

Leaning back against her console, and the rest of the bridge, Yurika stood unconvinced. She didn't remove Akito from active duty so he could die in some science experiment. "Did you say before that you thought the jumps might have been influenced by Jovian technology why has that changed now?" A distinct accusing tone in her voice.

Oh how Inez wished Ruri hadn't left before telling her exactly how this test went so she could just get Yurika to agree to it. "It hasn't changed technically but it was a very off chance that the jumps were influenced by the Jovians." Judging from Yurika's body language, her hands taught and clenching the edge of the console, her eyes twitching, and her breathing increasing to heavy labored breaths, Inez could feel the time running out. Yurika was about to deny this test soon if she didn't come up with a way of calming her. Then it hit her, an epiphany. "What about if we add a kill switch of sorts? We have a manner of monitoring Akito in his Aestavalis that could stop the test if his life is put in any danger."

Yurika's grip lessened. If Akito was going to be completely safe and they found a way of helping to end the war via technology everything would be better. The crew could take some shore leave after the war, they could get closer, maybe even marry! "What would we need for this?" Yurika was careful to keep her voice level and show nothing of her budding willingness to this project.

Her heart almost stopped as she heard Yurika talking, Inez had succeeded! "Somebody would have to go with him, somebody with an IFS," bad wording Inez realized instantly as Yurika's brows furrowed. To Yurika anybody with an IFS and a pilot was a problem, those harpies would love to be alone with her Akito and she wasn't going to let that happen. Yurika opened her mouth to veto that plan when Inez cut in again, "Miss Hoshino here would be the optimal choice. She could easily monitor both Akito and his Aestavalis and she already has an IFS." Inez hoped to kill two birds with one stone.

Sparing the computer technician a glance, Yurika saw potential. Ruri was a child, and while she was a cute child, Yurika doubted Akito was a pedophile. And in honestly Yurika had a pleasant dream that night that involved not only Ruri but Akito as well. Of the three of them being a family. Akito the father and husband, her the wife and mother, and Ruri as the child. Sure they'd have to adopt her, if it was possible with her real family being found, but not impossible. Could she trust Ruri, yes she could. "She'd have to agree to it and I'd like to see this in writing before you risk either of their lives."

Inez didn't have a chance to ask the young child as Ruri spoke before either had realized she'd been listening. "I would be willing to be involved in this test." Her young voice sounded to mature for the body producing it. Ruri was standing before both women with a hint of embarrassment adorning her face, adding a slight pink to the otherwise pale skin. "I would like to keep Tenkawa-san safe."

Inez's smile was twofold but genuine in ever respect. She saw how the Ruri she had known on Mars was buried under the surface of the child, and saw promise for seeing that older Ruri again. "Well captain, I'll have that report for you in a few hours. I'd like to have the test as soon as possible. I'd hate for an attack to occur during the test." Feeling giddy with success, Inez took the young Hoshino with her to a lab to conduct a few tests to apiece Yurika. Was this how it happened before, Inez didn't know as she made a point of keeping the older Ruri from divulging to much information, but who cared if it worked.

"Inez-san, you're strange. Why are you so set on helping Wong-san, she has intent that is obvious not in our favor," the young Ruri asked flatly. Inez looked down at her and wondered where her older self's ability to speak with some emotion came from. That was answered as Akito waved at them as he walked into the galley ahead of them. Something's never change.

Hiding her smile behind her hands, Inez giggled at the irony of it all. "You'll understand when you're older Ruri, trust me."

X-X

"You want me to risk both my life and Ruri-chan's?" Akito's voice was filled with doubt and apprehension as he sat in his Aestavalis. Sure he was ready to risk his own life for this test, but he hadn't wanted to risk any others, least of all Ruri's. He'd grown fond of the young girl after the time he'd spent with her. She had such a hard life growing up without parents, being viewed as strange, and that harsh upbringing she had. The more he thought about her the more he saw his own childhood and the Ruri he grew up with in the child in the seat in front of him in his modified cockpit.

A vid-screen immerged to his left, Inez was looking less than confident at the moment. "She'll be find Akito. She'll be linking directly into your IFS so whatever allows you to jump will let her as well. And if she detects anything strange she'll be able to shut down the unit and abort the test." She hoped, hoped and prayed with all her might she was right. _This is it, he has to let her stay or its over._

Yurika's face popped up in a screen on Akito's right, concern but confidence was her expressions. "We can trust Ruri-chan to keep you safe Akito-chan. And after this test we can all have dinner and talk about a dream of mine, both of you." The content smile on her face told much to those viewing. It was a surface act to keep them all confident. Inside Yurika was still very close to stopping the test, her palms were sweaty and her throat dry.

Looking at Ruri, Akito wasn't so convinced, patting her head. "Are you sure about this Ruri-chan, I could still drop you off before I start the test." He hoped she'd say yes, that she had second thoughts. He was nervous as hell just thinking about what he was going to do, he couldn't fathom what she was thinking. What worried Akito the most was why he couldn't get his Ruri out of his mind? She hadn't been around to talk to him in a few days and it was worrying him. He thought they were going to try and be friends again, but then why the prolonged absence? "I won't be mad if you want to," Akito added just in case.

Blushing at the contact, Ruri turned to look at Akito, "I wish to do this Tenkawa-san. I am the most qualified to keep you safe and I wish to." To what degree she didn't know, but at that moment that child would have followed Akito through hell to keep him safe. "Lets begin this test so we can see what the captain wants with us," she tried to smile but only ended up drawing her lips up into a thin straight line.

Closing his eyes and breathing out slowly in frustration, Akito relented. He'd never been good at standing up to women, why start now. "Alright let's do this thing." Tightening his grips on the controls, Akito listened intently to the commands Inez gave him. If anything was going to go wrong it wasn't going to be caused by him, not with somebody else's life on the line.

From her station on the bridge, Inez could feel her stomach tremble and quack as her nerves beset her. "Starting count down Akito…Ruri. Concentrate on where you to go and this should be over in ten seconds. Beginning count down." Inez heard Megumi start counting but couldn't be sure what the numbers were. She knew that the older Ruri was somewhere aboard the ship watching this mission with the same intensity as she was.

Dozens of tiny blue crystals flooded out around the pink mecha as the count reached five. Inez could feel the bile rising in her stomach as the anxiety hit her. Ruri was watching with her helmet off from the hanger bay. What good would it be to hid things now, and it wasn't like anybody was watching her. She felt numbness. Life or death was only a few moments away. _I want to live, I want to live with Akito, I want to live with Inez, I don't want to die._ A lone tear tracked its way down her cheek as the fear settled in.

Akito's palms opened and readjusted as the count reached two. How was Ruri handling this? Was that little girl as nervous as he was? Don't think about that think about the bow of the ship. _The bow the bow the bow the bow the bow the bow!_ "One…" Akito didn't hear Megumi say 'field open' he knew it. His eyes were accosted by such a brilliant white light that he was sure he'd be blind from it. Try as he might to shut his eyes it mattered not, the light got in anyway. The felt the sensation of having the ground drop out from underneath him. It was maddening as much as it was exhilarating.

Then it stopped, the light was gone, he felt whole again, and he was looking out at the bow of the ship.

It took him three minutes calm down and looked around. He didn't know if the test was a success or if it'd even happened. Taking some steadying breaths he heard a voice calling out to him, was it Ruri in front of him? It had to be right? "Akito…Akito!" Why was the voice so frantic? Did they abort the test after all. "Akito what happened where is Ruri-chan?" Yurika's frantic voice tore through Akito's adrenaline filled mind. His eyes snapped open and sure enough he was alone in the cockpit, Ruri was gone.

X-X

Akito didn't get out of his cockpit as much as he threw himself out of it. The whole crew had rushed to the hanger bay after the jump. Ruri's disappearance rattling more than just a few cages. Running straight at Inez, a mad glint in his eyes, Akito wanted answers. "You said she'd be safe! What the hell happened Inez! What was all that talk about her being able to jump because she was linked to my IFS! ANSWER ME!" He screamed in her face. He didn't know what he felt, anger, hatred, sadness, betrayal, but mostly he felt guilty. He was responsible now for what happened to Ruri, and what else could he think but she wad dead.

"Akito-chan," Yurika said softly to try can calm him, but her own tears did little to sooth Akito's mind. The eyes of the crew on him were all accusatorial, they knew he didn't mean for it to happen, but it did. The young woman was gone yet Akito was still there. Was it his fault, not directly but enough to make them blame him.

Taking several steps away from Akito, Inez could only speculate on what happened as she hadn't seen the older version of the woman in days. "I don't know what happened Akito. The test was a success you jumped…we couldn't have predicted this would have happened." Inez scanned the room, looking for that familiar blue hair, that damn mask, a sign that Ruri had in fact survived. Nothing…she saw nothing, and her heart sank.

"I know where she went," Ruri said from behind the saddened scientist stepping out from behind the large mass of a man named Goat. A smile on her face larger than anything she'd shown to others before, yet tears of joy streaming down her face marring the beauty in ways, accentuating it in others. Gasps and hushed murmurs erupted from the crew as the strange woman stepped forward. Akito just tilted his head confused, unknowing why his Ruri took now to show herself to the crew.

Throwing her helmet on the ground, the plastic creation shattered. "She went into the past Akito. She…I jumped back to a small Martian orphanage where I met a boy…I grew up with him…fell in love with him. I hurt him to keep my secret safe so I could live to this day hoping I didn't change things enough to prevent this event from happening. Akito…she's happier now than she's ever been in her life!" The last few words where shouted as Ruri finally told her secret to the man she hide if from for so many years.

"Its true," Inez said as the murmurs of disbelief grew in volume. "I've known Ruri for years. She told me of her time on Mars…of how Boson jumping isn't just teleportation in a location sense, but in a temporal sense as well. We seen this when Akito jumped back in time two weeks. This girl here is Ruri Hoshino." A joyous cheer erupted as the fear of the girls death was cleared, sure some were skeptical but nobody wanted to think the girl dead, they'd check the validity of the statement later, but for now they wanted to believe and it was enough.

Ruri rushed to Akito, threw her arms around him, and kissed the man firmly on the lips. Yurika looked on disapprovingly but for the moment said nothing. Things were uncertain now, Ruri no longer had foreknowledge of the events that would befall her, but she knew some things. She was alive, she loved Akito, and she would fight for him. Not wanting to let go of the man, nor he her for the moment, be it confusion at knowing the truth of his half thought speculation, Ruri's return, or the guilt leaving his body Akito just held her and kissed her.

For the future was now and they'd have to face it together either as friends or as lovers they didn't know. The moment decided it all for them, they could see a plethora of futures before them now as Ruri's fears had been removed, the gloves were off and she was a fighter. The other thing that Ruri knew now was the answer to a question.

_If I had met you before anyone else You would have loved me as in my dreams...as I wish, right?_

And that answer was yes, yes he would. And that was more than she could have ever hoped for.

-The End-


End file.
